A. The story is told of a rabbi was at odds with his congregation.
1. The president of the synagogue said, “Rabbi, we must have a conference to settle this dispute once and for all.”
2. So the rabbi, the president and the ten elders met together to discuss the issue, but the rabbi soon discovered that he was the sole dissenting opinion.
3. After some discussion, the president of the synagogue announced, “Let’s take a vote and let the majority rule.”
4. When the votes were collected, the president said, “Rabbi, you are outvoted eleven to one, we have the majority.”
5. The rabbi rose to his feet, “So you think you are right and I am wrong because of a vote. Well, think again, for I will call on the Holy One of Israel to give us a sign that I am right and you are wrong.”
6. Immediately, a deafening clap of thunder sounded, accompanied by a brilliant flash and the mahogany table they were gathered around was cracked in two.
7. The room was filled with smoke and the president and the elders were thrown to the floor, but the rabbi remained standing untouched and triumphant.
8. The president synagogue slowly rose from underneath the table; his hair was singed, his glasses where hanging from one ear and his clothes were in great disarray
9. The synagogue president got himself in order and announced, “Alright, alright, so the vote is now eleven to two, but we still have the majority!”
B. Life is fraught with disagreements and conflicts.
1. Just as we talked about last week, some things in life are black and white; clearly right or wrong, but there are also many things that fall into the grey area.
2. How are Christians supposed to make decisions about things that fall into the grey area?
3. Thankfully, the Bible gives us some guidance and Paul’s letter to the Romans is one of the inspired writings of the Bible that helps us the most.
4. Last week, as we studied Romans 14:1-12, we saw how that Paul challenged the Roman Christians to approach their disagreements with the following principles.
a. First, the strong, who felt they had the freedom to do certain things, must not look down on or despise those who feel they don’t have the freedom to do it..
b. Second, the weak, who felt they did not have the freedom to do certain things, must not judge or condemn those who feel they have the freedom to do it.
c. Third, each person should be fully convinced in their own mind, and should do what they believe will please their own heavenly master.
d. Fourth and finally, all of us should let God be the judge, it is not our job to judge God’s other servants.
C. Today, as we move into the second half of Romans 14, we will see that Paul offers another principle that will guide us as we navigate disagreements over disputable matters.
1. Last week I introduced you to a dilemma that a preacher I read about faced concerning that private club membership at a hotel that one of his members had bought him.
a. The membership entitled him to the use of the pool and dining room that had great meals at low cost to members.
b. You will recall that the dilemma involved the fact that in the evenings, that dining room became a “gentlemen’s club” featuring nearly nude female dancers.
c. We took a vote among ourselves and were divided about whether that preacher should use his membership during the day, but not at night.
2. I told you he used it only once, because he had the right to based on the spiritual principles in Rom.14:1-12, but didn’t use it again because of another spiritual principle in Rom. 14:13-23.
3. Let me share that preacher’s story in his own words: “There we were, my guest and I, enjoying our lunch at my private club at a local hotel to which I had been given a membership by someone in my church. The man across the table was a preacher from a neighboring town whom I had been encouraged to befriend. So I invited him for lunch and we were sitting by the window overlooking the beautiful swimming pool. I was telling him about the friend from my church who had bought me a membership to this place. And I told him about the privileges that were mine as a member, including the use of the pool. He looked rather shocked and said, ‘Do you believe in mixed bathing?’ ‘No,’ I replied with a smile on my face, ‘but I don't have any problem with mixed swimming.’ I thought it was pretty funny, but he never cracked a smile.
‘What are those large cages over there?’ he asked. ‘Well, I would never come here during the evening hours,’ I replied, ‘but I understand that in the evening go-go dancers get in those cages, are hoisted up where everyone can see them and perform for the patrons of the club.’
Needless to say, the rest of the lunch hour was extremely quiet. Conversation was rather strained. I could tell that my Christian brother was offended at being taken to such an establishment for lunch. I didn’t see anything wrong with eating lunch there when the go-go cages were empty. And yet, I never went back to that place and never used my membership again. Because although I felt perfect liberty to do it, the Bible teaches that I am to limit my liberty on the basis of love for my Christian brothers and sisters.”
D. Many of us would rather not hear that, because we want to do what we feel free to do, and we don’t want anybody telling us that we have any responsibility for the other guy.
1. That propensity toward self-centeredness started all the way back in Genesis when God asked Cain, “Where is Abel your brother?” and he answered, “I don’t know. Am I my brother’s keeper?” (Genesis 4:9).
2. People have been expressing that sentiment ever since: “What I do is my business, and what he does is his business. Don’t blame me for his actions. I’m not accountable for him. Am I my brother’s keeper?”
3. God's answer to that question today is basically the same as it was in Cain’s day: “Yes you are your brother’s keeper!”
4. Last week we learned that while we are not to judge our Christian brothers and sisters, because they answer to God and not to us (Romans 14:12), today we will learn that we are responsible for the way our conduct affects their lives.
5. Let’s work through Romans 14:13-23 and see how Paul presents this helpful guiding principle.
6. As we will see, Paul structures this section in the following chiastic order:
A - Warning about stumbling blocks (vs. 13b)
B – Nothing is unclean (vs. 14a)
C – Don’t destroy one for whom Christ died (vs. 15b)
C – Don’t tear down the work of God (vs. 20a)
B – All things are clean (vs. 20b)
A – Don’t do anything to cause a believer to stumble (vs. 21)
E. Paul begins verse 13, saying: Therefore, let us no longer judge one another. Instead decide never to put a stumbling block or pitfall in the way of your brother or sister. (Rom. 14:13)
1. The sentence, “therefore let us no longer judge one another” is transitional and sums up what Paul said in Romans 14:1-12.
2. Both those who are weak and those who are strong – that is, those who have misgivings and those who do not – are to accept one another as fellow members of Christ’s body.
3. And instead of judging each other, we should make a commitment not to do anything that would harm our brother or sister.
4. Paul uses two words to describe the kind of harm we might bring on a brother or sister and they both are vivid word pictures.
5. The first word is “stumbling block”
a. This is a picture of a path covered with stones, such that is it almost impossible to walk the path and not trip over a stone and take a hard fall – a lot of the trails we walk on during our men’s mountain hikes have a lot of stumbling blocks.
6. The second word is “pitfall” and it pictures a trap designed to catch an animal out in the woods.
a. When the animal takes the bait a trap springs, or they fall into a pit, or a net falls on them.
7. Paul’s overall point is clear: we must do everything we can to avoid bringing spiritual downfall to a brother or sister.
8. We must keep in mind that we are not talking about things that might simply bother their senses or their sense of propriety, but that which will cause them to sin.
F. In the next verse, Paul concedes with the strong that they are right on the basic issue.
1. Paul wrote: I know and am persuaded in the Lord Jesus that nothing is unclean in itself. Still, to someone who considers a thing to be unclean, to that one it is unclean. (Rom. 14:14)
2. It is impossible to overstate how radical this sounds coming from a man raised as an Orthodox Jew.
a. From the moment of his birth Paul had been taught the difference between clean and unclean foods.
b. Leviticus 11 contains a long list of food that was either permitted or prohibited to the Jews.
3. Nothing could ever have been more revolutionary for the converted Jew than learning that the kosher laws no longer applied.
4. This left men like Paul in a dilemma: should they continue to keep the kosher laws out of habit? Should they change their diet to demonstrate their new freedom in Christ? And most importantly, what should they say to others wrestling with these questions?
5. Paul wanted the Christians in Rome, both Jew and Gentile, to know that all foods are clean, but for the one whose conscience still thinks otherwise, it is unclean to them.
6. And because of that, we must be careful with the use of our freedom.
G. Paul continued: For if your brother or sister is hurt by what you eat, you are no longer walking according to love. Do not destroy, by what you eat, someone for whom Christ died. (Rom. 14:15)
1. The strong who feel free to eat certain meat, are causing harm to the weak who think it is wrong.
2. Paul uses very strong language for the damage being done to these Christians.
3. The word “hurt” means to cause pain or distress, but the damage doesn’t stop there, Paul says it may destroy those people spiritually – it may bring their ultimate spiritual ruin.
4. How might this happen, that the strong might destroy the weak?
a. One possibility is that the “peer pressure” brought about by the example of the strong may lead the weak to eat what he or she is still convinced is unclean, and so violate his or her conscience and thus be sinning.
b. Another possibility is that the strong believer’s flaunting their freedom may so offend conservative Jewish Christians that they are driven from their faith altogether.
5. Additionally, Paul emphasizes that this possible tragic outcome would fall on those for whom Christ died.
a. We shouldn’t want to do anything that might make the death of Christ a wasted sacrifice.
b. Christ loved them enough to die for them, shouldn’t we love them too?
H. The next thing that Paul brings to our attention is the values of the Kingdom of God.
1. Paul writes: 16 Therefore, do not let your good be slandered, 17 for the kingdom of God is not eating and drinking, but righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit. 18 Whoever serves Christ in this way is acceptable to God and receives human approval. (Rom. 14:16-18)
2. Paul is encouraging all of us, especially the strong, to reorder our priorities such that the kingdom values take precedence over selfish interest, pleasure and freedom.
3. Ultimately, the kingdom of God isn’t about the freedom to eat and drink, but is about righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.
a. Paul suggests that we should be valuing righteousness (behavior that is pleasing to God), peace which includes horizontal harmony with our brothers and sisters, and when these are present then joy will be the result.
4. And when we serve Christ in this way, then we will experience approval from God and approval from fellow believers.
I. Now, as Paul works his way back through his chiastic argument, he encourages the removal of stumbling blocks and the positive goal of edification.
1. Paul writes: 19 So then, let us pursue what promotes peace and what builds up one another. 20 Do not tear down God’s work because of food. Everything is clean, but it is wrong to make someone fall by what he eats. 21 It is a good thing not to eat meat, or drink wine, or do anything that makes your brother or sister stumble. (Rom. 14:19-20)
2. So we must live out the values of the kingdom by acting in ways that lead to “peace” and the “building up” of one another.
3. Have you ever noticed that at the beach there are always those children who want to build the sand castle, and there are always those children who want to tear it down? And as fast as the one builds the other tears down?
4. Sadly, the same often takes place in the church where some are working so hard to build up the body, while others, knowingly or unknowingly, do what tears it down.
5. None of us should do anything to tear down the body of Christ, and Paul emphasizes that we better not do so over something as foolish as the food we eat.
6. He says that while reiterating that all food is clean – the point is not who is right or wrong about food, but what is best for everyone involved.
7. And Paul emphasizes that it is best to not do anything that will cause a brother or sister to stumble.
8. How willing are we to give up our freedom for the sake of our brothers and sisters?
9. If I knew that my involvement in something, whether it be politics, or going to bars, or going to secular concerts had made someone quit the church and stop following Christ, would I consider giving up that freedom or at least keep that freedom more private?
J. In the final two verses of this section, Paul draws conclusions for both the strong and the weak.
1. Paul writes: 22 Whatever you believe about these things, keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the one who does not condemn himself by what he approves. 23 But whoever doubts stands condemned if he eats, because his eating is not from faith, and everything that is not from faith is sin. (Romans 14:22-23)
2. Paul urges the strong to keep their convictions about the matters in dispute to themselves.
a. There is no need for them to broadcast their views or to be continually trying to convince fellow believers how right they are.
3. The blessing at the end of verse 22 is the bottom line for the strong believers – they should act in such a way that they have no reason to “condemn” themselves by what they approve or practice.
4. But Paul reminds us again that there are those who are unconvinced about freedom on these matters.
a. And those believers, who still “doubt,” should not eat.
b. While the eating in itself is not wrong, it is wrong to violate one’s conscience.
c. The weak believer who would not be eating “from faith” (under the conviction that it is okay), would be sinning, because everything that is not from faith is sin.
K. So, what principles can we draw from these verses to help us navigate our differences about disputable matters?
1. First, we clearly see that there is the principle of liberty – we do have a lot of freedom in Christ.
a. Christianity is very different from the law-based Judaism of the old covenant.
b. That doesn’t mean that Christianity doesn’t have any dos and don’ts, but we are guided by many more principles than rules and laws.
2. Second, we see that there is the principle of conscience – we have a conscience, and we should not violate it, nor encourage others to violate their consciences.
a. The conscience isn’t the perfect guide, but it must be respected.
3. Third, we see that there is the principle of peace – a primary goal for Christians is to do our best to live in peace with our brothers and sisters and to do what builds others up.
a. It can never be a peace at any cost, but it may be a peace at great cost of our freedom.
4. Fourth, we see that there is the principle of silence – we have the freedom to hold our convictions and at the same time hold our tongues.
a. Everyone doesn’t have to know what we think, nor do we have to convince others to think like we think.
L. Here are some things to keep in mind.
1. Let me emphasize and repeat, Paul’s call for tolerance and acceptance of our brothers and sisters in Christ has to do with disputable matters, not matters that are clearly wrong.
a. Right doctrine and practice matters immensely and eternally.
b. Paul is not encouraging acceptance of any professing Christian, regardless of what he or she may believe or how he or she may behave.
2. One of the challenges we face has to do with determining what things are essential matters and what things are disputable matters.
a. We can err on the side of the “minimalists” whose list is so small that virtually no one and nothing is excluded – this impulse is strong in the ecumenical movement.
b. At the opposite extreme, we can err on the side of the “maximalists” whose list is so long and is filled with so many “t’s” to be crossed and “i’s” to be dotted that almost no one makes the cut – this impulse is strong in many fundamentalists groups.
3. I really like an early restoration motto that had the right balance, it says: “In essentials unity, in non-essentials liberty, in all things charity.”
a. We should be careful not to bind things that shouldn’t be bound, nor loose things that shouldn’t be loosed, but love must always be practiced no matter what.
4. Here’s something that love should help us do: to respect and acknowledge as genuine the faith and sincerity of others with whom we differ.
a. Love should cause us to try to understand and respect where people are coming from.
5. One of the most important things we can learn from Romans 14 is something that Paul does not say: nowhere in the chapter does Paul say that the weak in faith must change their view.
a. Paul does not tell them that they have to change their mind and he does not berate them from holding on to a view that they don’t have to hold on to.
b. But this is usually our first reaction to someone who differs from us – we want to change their minds; we want to convince them that we are right and they are wrong.
c. Paul would certainly support the church’s efforts to educate its members as fully as possible about the gospel and its implications.
d. But Paul is wise enough to know that there is a time and place for such efforts.
e. All of us have our sacred traditions and beliefs that dictate our personal consciences and preferences, and these things are not easy to give up.
f. But as long as they are not contrary to the gospel and are not hindering the work of the church, we should learn to tolerate these differences.
g. These things might have to do with our opinions and preferences about worship songs – the old hymns verses modern contemporary songs, or our choice of translations – there are those who insist on the King James Version, while there are others who value more modern translations.
h. We may have to agree to disagree, and try to meet each other half way.
M. And let me emphasize one more time the important principle that none of us should ever violate our own conscience nor encourage anyone else to violate their conscience.
1. Whatever does not come from firm Biblical conviction is sin for those who participate.
2. If any of us have doubts, then don’t do it.
3. And going back to the story of the preacher gifted with the private club membership.
a. He decided not to continue to use his membership because it was clear to him that his presence at that hotel at any time of the day could cause other Christians to sin.
b. And when he was perfectly honest with himself, he realized that he didn’t really feel comfortable there.
c. Even without the go-go girls in their cages, he found that just being in that place caused his mind to be distracted from a pure walk with God.
N. Finally, let me emphasize on final truth: God is always right, but I am not always right.
1. In one of his books, Robert Lightner tells of a custom Japanese parents use when their children can’t get along with their playmates.
a. The offending child is instructed to place his hands on one side of a pillow and say, “I am right and my friend is wrong.”
b. He then is to move to the next side and say: “My friend is right and I am wrong.”
c. Going to a third side he is to say: “My friend is partly wrong and I am partly wrong.”
d. Going to the fourth side of the pillow, the child is to say the final phrase with great thoughtfulness: “I am partly right and my friend is partly right.”
2. When we have differences with others over disputable matters that is often the case – I am partly right and my friend is partly right.
3. Let me end with a thought-provoking quote from Mark Twain: “When I, a thoughtful and unbiased Presbyterian, examine the Koran, I know that beyond any question every Mohammedan is insane; not in all things, but in religious matters. When a thoughtful and unbiased Mohammedan examines the Westminster Catechism, he knows that beyond any question, I am spiritually insane.
I cannot prove to him that he is insane, because you never can prove anything to a lunatic – for that is part of his insanity and the evidence of it. He cannot prove to me that I am insane, for my mind has the same defect that afflicts his.
All Democrats are insane, but not one of them knows it; none but the Republicans and the Mugwumps know it. All the Republicans are insane, but only the Democrats and Mugwumps can perceive it.
The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane. When I look around me, I am often troubled to see how many people are mad…this should move us to be charitable towards one another’s lunacies.”
4. God is right about all things, and while we try to think what God thinks and do as God would want us to do, let’s show love and graciousness toward those who think and do differently.
a. Let’s be careful never to judge others or look down on them.
b. Let’s be careful never to put a stumbling block or pitfall in the way of our brother or sister.
c. Let’s be careful never to violate our own conscience or lead someone to violate theirs.
5. Doing these things and letting God be the judge of all His servants will help us to avoid unnecessary conflict so that we can live in righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.
Resources:
Romans, The NIV Application Commentary, by Douglas Moo
A Warning to Wine-Drinkers, by Ray Pritchard
Am I My Brother’s Keeper?, by Richard Strauss
