One Anothers #5: “Accept One Another”
TEXT: Romans 15:7 – “Therefore accept…one another, as Christ also accepted us to the glory of God.”
INTRODUCTION
There are a multitude of controversial issues that cause believers to devour one another instead of “accept one another” as Paul commands us in our text this morning. Satan is a master at using controversial and extra-biblical issues to distract the church.
Illus. – A former police officer tells of the tactics of a group of thieves. – He says:
They enter the store as a group. One or two separate themselves from the group, and the others start a loud commotion in another section of the store. This grabs the attention of the clerks and customers. As all eyes are turned to the disturbance, the accomplices fill their pockets with merchandise and cash, leaving before anyone suspects. Hours—sometimes even days—later, the victimized merchant realizes things are missing and calls the police. Too late. (Tom McHaffie)
I wonder how often Satan uses this strategy! We’re seduced by distractions, while our churches are ransacked. Many of our churches have lost not their merchandise, but their MISSION, and “a church without a mission will soon be out of COMmission.”
So, to protect the church from being distracted over controversial, extra-biblical issues, Paul tells us that we are to “accept ye one another.”
What does Paul mean to “accept” one another?— Vines Expository Dictionary of New Testament Words informs us that the Greek word used here means “to take to oneself or to receive…suggesting a welcome.” Paul is saying “ACCEPT one another,” which is the opposite of “REJECT.”
But how can we ACCEPT one another with so many controversial issues that divide us? In verse 7, Paul begins by saying, “Therefore.” Now whenever you see the word “therefore” in the Bible, you should see what it’s there for. Well, let’s see what Paul’s “Therefore” is there for!
Paul gave the church in Rome some practical, step-by-step instructions on how to be in H.A.R.M.O.N.Y. with one another in Romans 14:1-15:7 in these kinds of divisive issues. In our “One Anothers” study a few weeks ago, we talked about how to have harmony in interpersonal relationships with things like personal hurts and offences in our study of the command for us to be “like-minded” with one another. Today, the focus is when there are disagreements about beliefs and practices about which the Bible does not clearly delineate.
You know, today’s churches have much in common with the Roman church.
The Roman church was NOT divided in their FAITH, but they were divided on many NONESSENTIAL issues. There were some who had strict religious beliefs about things like meat offered to idols, particular days of worship, and types of diets, and they thought that those who disagreed with their strict beliefs were what we would call today “LIBERAL.” Others, however, had an equally strong belief that in Christ, they were free from such constraints and they considered the opposing camp to be what we would call today “LEGALISTIC.”
Does any of this sound familiar to you? Paul says that the solution to all of this is to stop CONDEMNING one another and start ACCEPTING one another. Let’s discover “Paul’s Seven Steps to H.A.R.M.O.N.Y.” on disputable matters.
I. First, he teaches to Hold back judgment on disputable questions. – Romans 14:1 – “Accept him who is weak in the faith, without quarreling over disputable things.”
What are the disputable matters Paul is referring to? He’s referring to practices the Bible doesn’t clearly address; they’re in dispute; they lie in the “gray area” so to speak; they’re issues about which good Christians may legitimately have differing opinions.
We’re not talking about clear commands in the Word of God, or things that violate a clear biblical principle of God’s Word. For instance, we’re not talking about, say, ADULTERY. – The Bible clearly condemns that, and it’s not being judgmental to condemn adultery. Nor are we talking about things like drunkenness or greed, which the Bible clearly forbids. So, if you exhort a believer not to commit adultery or get drunk …you’re not being judgmental; you’re trying to rescue a fellow believer from sin.
But what about gray areas?—issues the Bible does NOT clearly address?— which good Christians dispute because the Bible is not decisively clear about? THAT’S what Paul was addressing in this passage.
The particular disputable matters Paul was dealing with concerned diet and dates that came about because there were both I and Gentiles in the church. Some, especially I, believed that certain days—like the Sabbath or certain holy days, like feast days or Passover—should be more sacred than others. Some also held to certain dietary rules, like not eating meat—probably because the meat in the marketplace was not kosher, and also had been offered to idols.
The other group believed that all days were the same and if you gave thanks to God for the meat, there was no problem with eating it, even if offered to idols. Non-kosher meat and meat that had been offered to idols were cheaper, so they might have seen it as better stewardship to eat such meat.
Well, who was wrong?—Paul says that NEITHER group is wrong because these issues are NONESSENTIAL; they’re NOT CRITICAL to Christian faith and practice.
What are some disputable matters among Christians TODAY?—We see it in things like music tastes, worship styles, Bible versions and alcohol consumption. And this is nothing new: When I was younger, people fought tooth and nail over such issues as clothing, hairstyles, make-up, going to movies, and on and on it went.
If the Scriptures don’t speak CLEARLY on an issue, it’s because God has given us FREEDOM to choose in that area according to our own discernment.
• The Roman believers were free to choose to keep the Sabbath as a sacred day if they felt they should, but they were also free to choose to hold all days as being the same if they felt they had that liberty.
• Likewise, they were free to choose NOT to eat meat offered to idols if it offended their conscience due to their former idolatrous lives, but they were also free to choose TO eat meat offered to idols if it didn’t bother their conscience.
There are many things that Christians are free to do or free NOT to do, but the one thing we are NOT free to do is to judge others or quarrel about disputable matters.
II. The second step to H.A.R.M.O.N.Y. about disputable matters is to Avoid looking down on those who don’t share your convictions about doubtful issues. – Romans 14:2-3 – “For one believes he may eat anything: another, who is weak, eats only vegetables. 3 Let not the one who eats despise him who abstains; and let not he who abstains judge him who eats: for God has accepted him.”
I’ve found that in disputable things, adherents of both sides of an issue can be judgmental:
• Sometimes a person who feels strongly against a certain practice or behavior will look at those who see nothing wrong with it and say, “Well, he’s a LIBERAL.”
• But the other side can be just as judgmental and look down on the person with a strong belief about a certain practice and say, “Well, he’s such a LEGALIST.”
Notice verse 3, where Paul condemns BOTH of these judgmental attitudes.
• Paul says that the one who feels he is FREE from certain constraints in disputable matters must not look down on those who disagree.
• But he also says that those who feel they SHOULD follow certain rules must not pass judgment on those who DON’T follow their rules.
Why not?
Look at verse 4 – “Who are you who judges someone else’s servant? It is before his own master he stands or falls. And he will indeed stand: for God is able to make him stand.”
Paul is saying, “Hey, don’t judge your brother, because he’s not YOUR servant, but GOD’S. He won’t answer to YOU, but to GOD. And God has accepted them BOTH. So, we DARE not look down on the one whom GOD has accepted.”
III. The third step to H.A.R.M.O.N.Y. is Realize that you must live for the Lord alone. – Romans 14:5-12 – “One man considers one day more sacred than another: another considers every day alike. Let each be fully persuaded in his own mind. 6 He who observes the day, observes it to the Lord; and he who does not observe the day, to the Lord he does not observe it. He who eats, eats to the Lord, for he gives God thanks; and he who does not eat, to the Lord he does not eat, and gives God thanks. 7 For none of us lives to himself, and no man dies to himself. 8 For if we live, we live to the Lord; and if we die, we die to the Lord: So then, whether we live or die, we are the Lord’s. 9 For to this end Christ…died, and rose, and lived again, that he might be Lord both of the dead and living. 10 But why do you judge your brother? Or why do you show contempt for your brother? For we shall all stand before the judgment seat of Christ. 11 For it is written, ‘As I live, says the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God.’ 12 So then each of us wil give account of himself to God.”
What is Paul teaching in this passage? He’s saying this: “Look, some people feel they CAN do some things and they do them to the Lord and some feel they CAN’T. But they’re both motivated by the same animating principle: that whatever they do, they’re doing it to the Lord.”
The key is to make sure that whatever choice you make on such issues, you’re honestly trying to please the LORD, and not your flesh or doing it out of rebellion. Live to the LORD; live to please HIM, not others, or your own desires.
Paul concludes in verse 10, “What right do you have to judge a believer because he disagrees with you on a disputable issue? How can you show contempt for such a brother or sister?”
So, Paul says in verse 12, “We’ll ALL stand before the judgment seat of Christ and EVERY ONE OF US will give account of himself to God. So, you let GOD do the judging. As for you…accept your brother or sister and don’t judge them regarding their position on disputable matters.”
IV. Number 4, Make sure you don’t put obstacles in the way of others. – Romans 14:13-18 – “Therefore let us not judge one another anymore: but judge this rather, decide never to put a stumbling block or an cause to fall in our brother’s way. 14 I know, and am persuaded by the Lord Jesus that there is nothing unclean in itself: but to him who considers anything to be unclean, to him it is unclean. 15 But if your brother is grieved because of what you eat, you are no longer acting in love. Do not destroy…with your food him for whom Christ died. 16 Do not let what is for you a good thing be spoken of as evil: 17 For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit. 18 For he who serves Christ in these things is acceptable to God, and approved by men.”
Some people are stronger in faith than others and can exercise liberty in certain things that weaker brethren might not. But those who are STRONGER in faith must be careful not to flaunt their liberty before those who don’t feel they have that liberty.
Some Christians need more protections from certain temptations to sin, and you don’t want to be responsible for causing a brother or sister to fall back into sin. And even if something may not be inherently sinful, if a person BELIEVES it is sinful for him, it BECOMES sinful for him to violate his conscience by doing it.
That’s what Paul means down in verse 23, where he says, “And he who doubts is condemned if he eats, because he does not eat in faith: for whatever is not from faith is sin.”
So, if the exercise of your liberty in a disputable matter causes another believer to violate his or her conscience and then to sin, Paul says in verse 15, “you’re no longer walking in love”—but in selfishness and you can “destroy” your brother for whom Christ died. Paul includes himself in the group that is strong in the faith and has the freedom to eat anything, but he says that it’s better to voluntarily restrict one’s freedom than to cause others to stumble by exercising it.
V. The next point is this: Only do what leads to peace and mutual edification. – Romans 14:19-21 – “Let us therefore pursue the things which make for peace, and which edify one another. 20 Do not tear down the work of God for the sake of food. Everything indeed is pure; but it is evil for that man who eats with offence. 21 It is good neither to eat meat nor to drink wine nor do anything by which your brother stumbles, or is offended, or is made weak.”
You see, what is good is BAD if it leads to disharmony and does not build up the church. So, Paul exhorts us to follow the things that engender peace, and which build up. Paul recognizes that a lot of things people get in a huff about really aren’t sin issues, but if my exercising that liberty causes a brother to stumble or be offended or be spiritually weakened, we ought to avoid it in their presence.
Now be careful about the word “offended” in verse 21. I’ve heard preachers use this to say that if what you do OFFENDS someone, you shouldn’t do it, and I’ll tell you what: people can sure get “offended” easily. But a closer look at this word in the Greek shows that it means something different from the English word “offend” which the English dictionary defines as “to cause somebody anger, resentment, or hurt.” The Greek word is skandalízo (pron. skan-dal-íd-zo) (s?a?da????), which means, “to entrap, trip up; or entice to sin or apostasy.”
Paul is saying that you should LIMIT your liberty if it can cause a weak brother or sister to fall back into sin, NOT if it gets them in a huff because of your liberty.
VI. Number 6—Never put on parade your personal convictions. – Verse 22 – “Whatever you believe about these things, keep between yourself and God. Happy is he who does not condemn himself by what he allows.”
Paul says that just as a person with liberty shouldn’t flaunt his liberty, neither should you flaunt your personal convictions, nor try to force others to your point of view. Why does Paul tell us to keep our personal convictions about disputable matters, either pro or con, between ourselves and God in verse 22? Because our personal convictions are just that—PERSONAL! If they were meant for everyone, God would have put them in His Word! But He DIDN’T; He gave them to YOU—so you shouldn’t strut around telling everyone all the things they shouldn’t do on disputable matters because YOU don’t feel you should do them.
How could you “condemn yourself by what you allow,” as Paul puts it in verse 22?—By having a spirit of pride, thinking that you’re somehow more spiritual because of your strong convictions on disputable issues. If someone asks you about your beliefs on disputable matters, they’re certainly nothing to be ashamed of, because they’re what you believe.
But be careful not to equate personal convictions with holiness. They CAN be a sign of holiness if you do them to obey God’s leading in your own life or to protect you from your personal weaknesses. But they can also be a source of pride, as with the Pharisees who thought that their strict adherence to the Law meant they were holy.
In fact, Jesus’ harshest condemnation was reserved for the Pharisees— those most conscientious of all the things they DID NOT DO for God’s sake. Why?— Because they kept God’s commandments meticulously? No, but because they made the commandments of men equal to the commandments of God. The surest evidence of TRUE holiness is genuine humility.
VII. Lastly, Paul teaches us that to have H.A.R.M.O.N.Y, we must Yield personal preferences for the common good. – Romans 15:1-7 – “We then who are strong have an obligations to bear with those who are weak, and not to please ourselves. 2 Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, to edify him. 3 For even Christ did not please himself… [Now skip down to verse 7] 7 Therefore accept…one another, as Christ also accepted us to the glory of God.”
Paul is saying here that we should not insist on our own point of view but seek to please one another and to work towards unity.
Paul holds up Jesus as the ultimate example of someone who, rather than pleasing Himself, gave up His personal preferences for the good of mankind. We know Jesus didn’t personally prefer to suffer and die on the cross. In the garden before His arrest, He asked the Father if it were possible for that cup of suffering to pass from Him—but also prayed, “Not my will, but YOURS be done.”
If Jesus didn’t please Himself, how can YOU or I? If you insist on having YOUR own way in disputable matters, or if you insist that others must conform to YOUR views, then you’re missing the point. Paul concludes by saying, “Accept one another” in verse 7.
And HOW are we to “accept one another”?—Now this is important: Verse 7 says, “as Christ also accepted us to the glory of God.” How has Christ accepted us?
• According to anything we have done or deserve?—NEVER!
• According to our views on this or that issue?—NEVER!
• According to whether we abstain from this or that!—NO.
Jesus has accepted us totally by GRACE—undeserved favor.
CONCLUSION
Brethren, when love prevails among believers, especially in times of strong disagreement, it presents to the world an indisputable mark that we’re true followers of Jesus Christ. When love does NOT prevail among believers in these times, it shows the world a sad witness. The real question is: What will Grace Baptist Church show to the world? That depends on how YOU—those who make up Grace Baptist—deal with disputable issues.
So, let’s summarize Paul’s message: Basically, it’s as simple as this – DON’T JUDGE ONE ANOTHER IN DISPUTABLE THINGS. If you have beliefs against certain disputable practices—don’t judge those who don’t and don’t parade your list of convictions; just live them out with love and integrity. And if you believe you can have liberty in some of these issues—don’t JUDGE those who don’t, and don’t FLAUNT your liberty before those whose consciences are weak.
God help each of us not to be distracted by a bunch of controversial, disputable things. Rather, let’s focus on love and Christ and His Kingdom and reaching those without Christ.
Or as my preacher used to say, “Let’s keep the main thing the main thing.” And let’s focus on what the Word is clear and decisive on. There’s a reason He was so clear and decisive on those things: They’re what He wanted us to focus on! And there’s enough of that to keep me busy for the rest of my Christian life.
