We’ve been in this series called Family Values.
The Ten Values are based on Ten Commandments and they all come from God.
The first nine commandments deal with our actions.
But Commandment #10, deals with an attitude of the heart.
The first nine are outward issues, dealing primarily with behavior. The tenth is more inward, it deals with something far less tangible than specific behaviors.
The tenth Commandment reveals the darkest corners of our hearts.
It would be fair to say that lust, greed, and selfishness are all rooted and centered in the tenth commandment, which is found in Exodus 20:17.
Exodus 20:17 (NIV)
17 "You shall not covet your neighbor's house. You shall not covet your neighbor's wife, or his manservant or maidservant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor."
Every single one of us have broken this command.
It began when we were toddlers fighting over each other’s toys in the nursery.
It continued as teenagers when we secretly desired the physical traits or characteristics of one of our friends.
It’s what happens when we want what others have.
It could be a car, a house, a motorcycle, a phone, a gadget, or some other material thing.
But it’s not just stuff. It is broader than that
It could be your desire for someone else’s spouse, or their position, or their influence, or their children. The list of possibilities is endless.
It can lead to some very dark places.
Coveting is the uncontrolled desire to acquire…
The desire to acquire can be applied to just about anything that someone else has.
That doesn’t mean we cannot desire anything.
We can have ambitions. We should set goals.
But coveting has to do with an excessive craving for things that belong to someone else.
Coveting is often rooted in greed, envy, and jealousy.
Whenever we want something that someone else has,
we have subtly rejected God’s desire for our lives.
It is like we’re saying what God has provided, and what He has blessed us with is not enough.
There is an unhealthy craving for more.
We rarely hear the word covet, but we see plenty of examples of coveting all around us each and every day.
The desire to acquire in itself, is not a bad thing.
God placed that desire, or that ambition within you.
He filled the world with all kinds of exciting, wonderful, good, desirable things and He's give you a healthy desire to acquire these things.
That in and of itself is not bad.
The problem comes with control.
There are some things that are off limits.
They are not yours to want.
They will harm you.
So, we need to be careful.
We need to exercise control.
And that is not easy to do in our materialistic world.
Contentment sometimes seems to be in short supply.
This morning I want to begin by looking at some of the harmful effects of always wanting more.
This is what happens when I don't control this drive to acquire.
Coveting leads to FATIGUE.
In our push to get more (and never in history have we been so pushed to get so much so quickly) we overwork and take on second and third jobs for the sole purpose of acquisition.
It's the material rat-race and it leads to fatigue.
Proverbs 23:4 (NLT)
4 Don’t wear yourself out trying to get rich. Be wise enough to know when to quit.
It's foolish to wear yourself out constantly trying to get more.
God’s Word challenges us to be wise enough to know when to quit.
Coveting leads to DEBT.
Thanks Jeff and Michelle Ellis – This afternoon they will complete the current session of FPU. This has been our largest class to date.
I also want to congratulate those who have been a part of this or previous classes.
One of the primary lessons learned in FPU is to curb your wants and live within your means. Get rid of debt.
This is one of the paths coveting inevitably takes us down.
Ecclesiastes 5:11 (TLB)
11 The more you have, the more you spend, right up to the limits of your income. So what is the advantage of wealth—except perhaps to watch it as it runs through your fingers!
Sometime the problem isn’t that we don't make enough money.
Sometimes we just want too much.
A lot of the things we call needs are actually greeds.
Some people can’t seem to get enough.
It always costs more to have more.
Coveting can drive people further and further into debt.
If the grass is greener on the other side of the fence
you can count on it - the water bill is higher too.
Coveting can wreck your budget and drive you into debt.
Coveting leads to WORRY.
When we focus on things we inevitably worry.
Ecclesiastes 5:12 (TEV)
12 Workers may or may not have enough to eat, but at least they can get a good night's sleep. The rich, however, have so much that they stay awake worrying.
The more you have, the more there is to worry about.
It begins by worrying about how to get it.
Then we worry about…
How we’re going to protect it.
How we can save it.
Where to invest it.
How to insure it.
How to avoid the taxes on it.
How to keep from losing it, and so on.
Coveting leads to fatigue, debt, and worry.
Add them together and you have #4.
Coveting leads to CONFLICT.
Conflict is often the result of always wanting more.
James 4:1 (NIV)
1 What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don't they come from your desires that battle within you?
Financial tension is one of the top causes of divorce.
Couples fight about money. They fight about possessions.
When someone else has what you want, it often leads to conflict.
God says, "Don't covet that which belongs to somebody else."
Don't covet somebody else's job, car, house, wife, husband, etc. Don't do it.
Coveting leads to DISSATISFACTION.
These are the word of King Solomon, the wisest man to eve live, apart from Jesus.
Ecclesiastes 5:10 (NIV)
10 Whoever loves money never has money enough; whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with his income. This too is meaningless.
The Living Bible says "It's foolish to think that wealth brings happiness!"
Things can bring happiness for a while.
But the thrill is short lived. It doesn't last.
The excitement wears off.
We have all experienced this.
You get something new.
You have been looking forward to it.
You are so excited about it.
It is wonderful at first, but before long, the new wears off.
It's not so great any more.
Why don't things make us permanently happy?
Because things don't change and people do.
Since things don't change, we get bored with them.
Here are two key words that will help this make sense…
FASHION & STYLE.
Because things don't change we get bored with them.
We have to have something new.
You don’t want what you wanted last year.
Your wants are always changing.
That’s why we have to periodically redecorate, or remodel, or repair, or replace, or at least rearrange some things.
Things don't provide permanent happiness.
I wonder how many of you are still thrilled about the Christmas gifts you received last Christmas.
Most people don't even remember what they got last Christmas!
That is because things do not bring lasting happiness.
They are just a temporary thrill.
Coveting is the leading cause of dissatisfaction in the world.
The antidote to coveting is contentment.
The Apostle Paul had this to say about contentment…
Philippians 4:12 (NIV)
12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have LEARNED the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.
Contentment is something you have to learn.
It does not come naturally.
I am not by nature a contented person - and neither are you.
Contentment is not automatic.
You have to learn to be content.
It is a process of educating ourselves and making specific commitments.
How can we learn to be content?
1. Resist comparing yourself to others.
Comparing always leads to coveting.
It is not wise.
2 Corinthians 10:12 (NIV)
12 We do not dare to classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves. When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise.
Comparing yourself to others—whether it is houses, cars, jobs, looks, clothes, kids, etc. -- is not wise. In fact, it is foolish.
You create all kinds of dissatisfaction in your life by doing it.
Let me ask you this…
How do you react when you see somebody with a nicer car?
Do you say, "I wish I had that" or can you just be glad that they have a new car?
How do you react when you see somebody with a nicer house?
or better furniture?
It is a sign of maturity when you develop the ability to admire without having to acquire or compete.
I don't have to own everything to enjoy it.
Learn to be happy for others and be content with what you have.
Often, we compare because that is the way we keep score.
We try to measure a person’s worth by their possessions.
That is a definite sign of insecurity.
Your net worth has absolutely nothing to do with your self-worth.
Don't compare net worth to self-worth.
There is no comparison.
1 Timothy 6:9 (NIV)
9 People who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction.
Things can control us.
You can be possessed by your money and possessions if you’re not careful.
People will sacrifice values, morals, integrity, and all kinds of things in their pursuit to get more.
They'll even sacrifice relationships to get an extra dollar.
Did you hear about the lady that won the lottery the other day?
She won 17 million dollars.
She called her live-in boyfriend, "I've just won the lottery.
I'm worth 17 million dollars. Start packing."
The boy friend said, "Great, warm weather or cold weather?"
She said, "It doesn't matter as long as you're gone by the time I get home."
Stop comparing.
2. Rejoice in what you have.
Appreciate God’s blessings and be thankful.
Ask God to open your eyes to His blessings.
We all have so much to be thankful for.
Ecclesiastes 5:19 (NIV)
19 Moreover, when God gives any man wealth and possessions, and enables him to enjoy them, to accept his lot and be happy in his work--this is a gift of God.
God says I want you to accept, enjoy, and be grateful.
What you have is a gift.
You wouldn't have anything if it weren't for God.
It's all a gift from Him.
We can easily get trapped in When and Then Thinking.
When and Then Thinking says,
"When this happens______, then I'll be happy."
"When I get this ______, then I'll be happy."
"When I get there ______, then I'll be happy."
It never works like that.
Who or what are you waiting on to make you happy?
When I get married, then I'll be happy.
When I get out of this marriage, then I'll be happy.
When I have kids, then I'll be happy.
You are as happy as you want to be.
Happiness is a choice. It's your choice.
Happiness is not getting whatever you want.
Happiness is learning to enjoy whatever you have.
God wants us to enjoy His blessings.
1 Timothy 6:17 (TLB)
17 Tell those who are rich not to be proud and not to trust in their money, which will soon be gone, but their pride and trust should be in the living God who always richly gives us all we need for our enjoyment.
God wants us to enjoy what we have.
Like any loving father, I think God enjoys watching us enjoy what He's given to us.
God enjoys watching you enjoy His blessings.
But what parent enjoys watching a child who is always greedy for more?
One of the marks of maturity is when you can say "enough is enough - I'm happy with what I have."
There are really only two ways to have enough in life:
And that is to get more or want less.
Be thankful for what you have.
A third way to learn contentment…
3. Release what you have to help others.
God doesn't want to just bless you for your own benefit.
He blesses us so we can help others.
We are blessed to be a blessing.
1 Timothy 6:17-19 (TLB)
17 Tell those who are rich not to be proud and not to trust in their money, which will soon be gone, but their pride and trust should be in the living God who always richly gives us all we need for our enjoyment.
18 Tell them to use their money to do good. They should be rich in good works and should give happily to those in need, always being ready to share with others whatever God has given them.
19 By doing this they will be storing up real treasure for themselves in heaven—it is the only safe investment for eternity! And they will be living a fruitful Christian life down here as well.
When he says, "Tell those who are rich", who is Paul talking to?
We have talked about this before.
He is talking to all of us.
All Americans are rich.
By the world’s standards, even if you're on welfare, you're rich.
You may not feel rich, but if you make $20K annually
You are in the top 3% of income earners in the world.
So, what that means is that this verse is talking to all of us.
The question is this;
Is it possible to be wealthy and not be materialistic?
The answer is yes!
It's possible to be wealthy and not be materialistic.
Materialism is an attitude.
You can be poor and greedy or rich and greedy.
You can be poor and contented or wealthy and contented.
It's an attitude.
How can we be wealthy and not materialistic?
Paul gives four precautions in these verses.
If you follow these four things you can be as wealthy as you want and you won't be materialistic.
a. Don't become proud of your wealth.
Don't think you're better than somebody because you have more money than they do.
b. Don't put your trust in money.
Don't look to possessions for your security.
Security is not in your bank account.
Our security is in the Lord.
Bank accounts can be lost overnight in a thousand different ways.
So, don't put your security in money, no matter how much, or how little you have.
Make sure your trust is in the Lord.
c. Use your money to do good.
If you have a lot of money…
Don’t waste it. Use it to do good.
If you have a little money…
Don’t waste it. Use your money to do good.
d. Give cheerfully.
The Bible says that the more we receive…the more we are to give.
Giving is the cure for the disease of materialism.
You can exercise your way out of materialism by giving.
You might say you have won a spiritual victory every time you're generous.
This is how you handle wealth in a way that is pleasing to God.
The benefit: "You will be storing up real treasure in heaven."
Every time you give, you're storing up treasures in heaven.
It's like you're sending it on ahead and God's taking note every time you give.
That reminds me of the story of the guy who died and went to heaven.
He’s standing there talking to Peter when he saw his best friend drive by in a Mercedes.
He asked Peter "What's that all about?"
Peter said, "The transportation you're given in heaven is based on how much you've given (sent on ahead) while you were on earth. Your friend was very generous. He gave us a lot to work with. That’s why he got a Mercedes."
"Well, what about me? What will I get to drive?"
Peter said, "Well, as you know, you weren't all that generous. You’ll get a moped".
That guy was kind of sad about his moped.
But he felt better when he saw his former boss come by on a pair of roller skates.
What are you sending on ahead?
Jesus himself said: “It is more blessed to give than to receive." (Acts 20:35)
Generosity is a sign of spiritual maturity.
When you get more excited about what you give away than what you get, that's a genuine mark of spiritual maturity.
The fourth thing you can do to learn contentment…
4. Refocus your life around eternal priorities.
2 Corinthians 4:18 (NIV)
18 So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
Everything you see/have/want is temporary.
Nothing lasts forever.
Jesus told a story about a guy who was really successful.
He had barns full of grain.
It was another bumper crop year.
The guy’s response to these blessing was to just keep building bigger barns.
He didn’t get it.
He never considered sharing his blessings.
He just kept it all to himself.
And God said He was a fool.
The guy failed to realize that there is more to life than things.
Then Jesus made this point…
Luke 12:15 (NIV)
15 Then he said to them, "Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions."
Culture says, if I have a lot, I am worth a lot.
If I have a little, I'm worth a little.
But that's just not true.
The cross says you are worth a lot regardless of what you have.
I think we need to do a periodic checkup and ask ourselves the tough question,
"What am I really living for?
Do you know to tell what you are living for?
What do you think about the most?
What do you talk about the most?
What do you spend the most time on?
What do you spend the most money on?
These are the things that tell us what our true priorities really are.
True contentment will never come from possessions.
Contentment is found in a close, personal relationship with Jesus Christ.
The Ten Commandments. 10 Family Values.
As you build your life on these important values, I am convinced that your life will be truly blessed.
CLOSING PRAYER
