OPEN: Someone once asked a bunch of elementary aged children what they thought about love.
Glenn, age 7: If falling love is anything like learning how to spell, I don’t want to do it. It takes too long.
Regina, age 10 agrees: I’m not rushing into love. I’m finding fourth grade hard enough.
Angie, age 10: Most men are brainless, so you might have to try more than once to find a live one.
Dave, age 8: Love will find you, even if you are trying to hide from it. I’ve been trying to hide from it since I was five, but the girls keep finding me.
Manuel, age 8: I think you’re supposed to get shot with an arrow or something, but the rest of it isn’t supposed to be painful.
ILLUS: Some recent studies tell us that when a person is in love, their brain lights up.
When you're in love, your eyes light up, your face lights up - and apparently, so do 4 tiny bits of your brain. According to Andreas Bartels, a research fellow at University College London: It is the common denominator of romantic love.
When test subjects were shown photographs of their sweethearts… certain areas of their brain just lit up – which means there’s a higher flow of blood going to that part of the brain.
These "love spots" were near, but not the same as, sections that become active when someone is feeling simple lust. And - in addition - looking at these pictures of their sweethearts also reduced activity in 3 larger areas that are active when people are upset or depressed.
(Janet McConnaughey R.Digest 9/01)
APPLY: In the text we’re looking at this morning, Jesus is SCOLDING the church at Ephesus.
They’ve lost something.
What have they lost? (Their First Love)
And Jesus rebukes them for it.
"Nevertheless I have this against you, that you have left your first love. Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent and do the first works, or else I will come to you quickly and remove your lampstand from its place—unless you repent.” Revelation 2:4-5
It’s like Jesus is telling them there’s certain parts of brains that don’t light up like they used to.
But how did that happen? How did they lose their first love for Jesus? Was it kinda like when you lose your keys or your TV remote? I mean - did they just misplace Jesus somewhere along the line? Well yes… and no.
I’ve known people (and whole churches) that have lost their first love for Jesus. But they didn’t wake one morning and say “I’m going to walk away from Jesus today.” If they gave any thought to it at all - if they even realized it had happened - they might say that their love for Him was just missing. They’d say it feels like they’ve MISPLACED that love and they just don’t know where it went.
But that’s not actually what happens.
They don’t MIS-place Jesus… they RE-place Jesus.
It’s kind of like a man who loses his love for his wife - and runs off with another woman. Most adulterers don’t set out to do that. They don’t just wake up one day and say “Hey, I think I’ll leave my wife today.”
ILLUS: At my first church I had one man come to me with his fiancé asking me to marry them. They’d both been divorced so I asked what happened in their previous marriages. His answer was “We just fell out of love.”
That raised all kinds of red flags, so pursued it a little further: “How long were you married?”
“Five years” he replied.
“When did you ‘fall out of love?’”
“About the 3rd year.”
“So, why did you fall out of love?” I asked.
“Oh, I don’t know, we just did.”
By the flippant way he answered I realized he’d fall out of love with this woman too, and I wanted nothing to do with the wedding.
He was telling me he just lost his love for his first wife… kind of like losing his keys. And it didn’t bother him in the least. But I doubt he “misplaced” his love for her. More than likely he found someone else who “replaced” that love.
ILLUS: Years ago, a number of preachers and I attended a session conducted by a local counselor. He warned to beware of our church secretaries, because he’d known too many preachers who’d run off with their secretaries… even though they were not nearly as attractive as the wives these men had left.
He said what happened was: the secretary would come into the office and do something nice for preacher… and he’d compliment her. Later on, she’d do something else for him… he’d give her more compliments. Before long this interaction built to the point where the secretary thought: “If only my husband treated me like this at home.” And the preacher got to thinking “if only my wife treated me like this at home.” And eventually they ran off together, only to find (about 6 months later) that the person they ran off with wasn’t all that much different than the spouse they’d left.
The key problem was that these preachers had allowed someone else to replace their wives in affections.
And that is what happens to people who lose their first love for Christ.
They allow something or someone else to take the place of Jesus in their hearts.
Now, this is a cautionary sermon. I’m not preaching this sermon because we have a problem here. I often tell people that we have people here who love Jesus in ways that make me feel inadequate.
But the church rebuked in Revelation was the church at Ephesus. This had once been a great church. Paul wrote to them (the letter to the Ephesians) and it is a letter with no condemnations. In fact, Paul commends this congregation highly.
If losing your “first love” can happen to the church at Ephesus, it can happen with you or me. I’ve seen preachers lose their first love/ Elders/ Deacons/ SS Teachers. It can happen to any of us. The question is not IF it could happen. The question is how do I protect myself from this danger?
The answer is found in a simple statement from Jesus in the Sermon on the Mount: “… seek 1st the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you” Matthew 6:33
ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS put God’s Kingdom and Righteousness above everything else. ALL THE TIME. That’s the way to avoid something else replacing our love for Jesus.
Now, you’d think that would be a no-brainer… but it’s not. Better people than you or I have fallen into this trap.
I could cover all kinds of ways people let something else replace Jesus, but I’m going to just focus on 3 topics today. And the 1st thing you could replace Jesus with in your affections… is YOU.
The Bible tells us that we are made in the image of God. How many of you knew that? Of course you did! Now that Biblical reality has an unusual side-effect.
ILLUS: Some time back researchers did a survey where they asked folks a number of questions about how they viewed God – His priorities and His view of mankind. AND they also asked a bunch of questions intended to have them describe themselves along with their priorities etc..
The researchers found the most intriguing thing when they collated the results: How the subjects’ viewed God - was remarkably like how they viewed themselves.
In other words, these folks tended to view God as an extension of themselves.
That’s not a bad thing necessarily… until folks begin to develop what I call a “God fixation”. That’s where they begin to think that God is like THEM. That He thinks like they do and has the same priorities and objectives in life. When that happens, folks can begin to think that any decision they make is … well… God’s decision.
ILLUS: Years ago I knew an Elder who (years before I’d known him) had almost died from an accident. His family nursed him back to health when the Doctors had given up all hope. This elder was convinced that his deliverance from death was brought about by God, and he was so grateful that he decided to dedicate himself to serving God in his local church … so that he could help direct the church. Now let me say now, I liked the man and I believe his heart was in the right place. The problem was this Elder believed HIS priorities were Jesus’ priorities and that his decisions were Jesus’ decisions. If you countered his decisions he would literally lose his temper. He did damage to that church because he forgot… HE wasn’t Jesus.
He’d forgotten his first love, because he was more in love with himself
That’s what damages a lot churches. There are Church members that get this God fixation. They don’t have to listen to Jesus…because Jesus listens to them. And, if they don’t get their way… somebody’s going to pay. Because they are speaking for Jesus.
Now, how can you tell if YOU are falling into this trap?
• If you catch your self saying “this is MY church”. Whose church is it? (Jesus’). Now I can understand saying you belong to this congregation and so it is “your church”… but these folks take that phrase to a whole new level of ownership.
• That phrase doesn’t have to be said however. If you catch yourself getting upset you didn’t get your way in a church decision then and making sure others in church know of your displeasure… and you work at making the lives of others uncomfortable because God’s will (channeled thru your displeasure) has been flaunted. People who do that have lost their first love. They’ve replaced Jesus… with themselves.
Another area where people replace Jesus is… with their FAMILY.
ILLUS: Saturday morning prayer breakfasts are enjoyable for me. About 20 men show up each Saturday to have breakfast and share what they’ve learned the week before about men from Scripture (each week is a different Bible character).
A couple weeks ago we studied the life an Old Testament priest named Eli – the priest who had raised Samuel the prophet as he grew up. But Eli had a personal problem - his sons had gone over to the dark side in their lives and (though they served as priests at the Tabernacle) did a lot of things they shouldn’t have done.
As I read God’s condemnation of Eli, these words stuck out: “you… honor your sons above me” I Samuel 2:29
Jesus said something like that: “Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.” Matthew 10:37
Whoa… back up the train here. You mean I shouldn’t love my family? No, that’s not what Jesus is saying. The Bible says a man is to love his wife, a father should not to provoke his children to anger, and a man is to provide properly for his family – because if he doesn’t, he’s worse than an infidel.
The Bible repeatedly drives home the fact that we should love our families. But what Jesus is saying was this: if you love your family MORE than Him, you’ve got your priorities out of whack.
If Jesus comes 2nd to family in anything, sooner or later Jesus will have to bow at the altar of your family.
Now how will you know you’ve put your family 1st… and Jesus 2nd?
All you have to do is ask some basic questions.
1. Is church a priority? Or do other activities take precedence?
ILLUS: What if you need to be out of town and can’t come to church here? Well, this Spring we’ll probably have some visitors who’ve shown up here about the same time every year. Their daughter plays ball in a league that holds a competition in Logansport every year. Why do they come here? They looked us up on the internet. They deliberately sought us out even though they’d never been here before. Why? Because they loved Jesus and they wanted to be in church.
2. Do you make sure your ADULT kids know it’s important to go to church with you?
My kids are adults now (at least on paper) and they don’t have to show up for church… so I reward them whenever they come. You could call it a bribe I suppose, but I view it as driving home to them how important Jesus is to me.
ILLUS: George Washington had a similar view. His preacher once noted "No company ever kept him away from church. I have often been at Mount Vernon on the Sabbath morning when his breakfast table was filled with guests. But to him they furnished no pretext for neglecting his God and losing the satisfaction of setting a good example. Instead of staying at home out of fancied courtesy to them, he used constantly to invite them to accompany him."
If you came to visit with Washington on a Sunday morning and didn’t plant to go to church, you had to figure what to do with yourself while he was gone… because he was going to church no matter what you did.
3. At family gatherings do you talk about your faith… or do you refrain for fear of alienating?
ILLUS: I have some relatives that once complained about me that all I talked about was my kids and Jesus. Well… I’m a dad, and I’m a preacher. What else am I going to talk about???
I love my kids and love Jesus and if you engage me in a conversation, that’s what I’m going to talk about. The best way to ensure that Jesus is always your FIRST love is to put Him first with your family.
The last thing folks replace their 1st love for Jesus with is… STUFF.
You know what STUFF is, don’t you?
Stuff, is the stuff that clutters up your life.
ILLUS: At my first church I visited a kindly old woman who had stack and stacks of magazines and newspapers all through her house. To get back to her easy chair you had to make your way thru an aisle she had created with those stacks of papers. That was her stuff and it cluttered up her house.
In the same way, Christians let stuff clutter up their lives and that stuff can block their love for Jesus.
1. Some folks complain that they’re too tired to get up and go to church on Sunday
2. Others complain that they have to work on Sundays… so just can’t make it to church.
3. Or there will be other activities that deprive them of Sunday worship and so they don’t go anywhere.
This is the stuff of life… this is REAL stuff. This it’s the kind of real stuff that gets in the way of our love for Christ. And – after a while - these people find themselves just not going to church at all… and just drifting away from God.
Now… let’s go back to the days of the early church. Did you realize that folks didn’t get Sundays off back then? Except for the Jews (who took Saturdays off) many Pagan cultures worked 7 days a week. It seems EVERYBODY worked on Sunday. Where on earth did Christians ever get the time to worship God?
Acts 20 tells us “On the FIRST DAY of the week, when we were gathered together to BREAK BREAD, Paul talked with them, intending to depart on the next day, and he prolonged his speech UNTIL MIDNIGHT. There were many lamps in the upper room where we were gathered.” Acts 20:6-7
They were gathered on the first day of the week. What’s the First Day of the week? Sunday. And what time of the day were they gathered? It had to be towards evening, because Paul preached until Midnight.
What were they doing in that upper room? They were breaking bread – the Lord’s Supper. Now, granted Paul was there and he preached, but he was just gravy, Communion was the real meat of their gathering. They may have studied Scripture and prayed, but every week they’d gather on Sunday night to take of the Lord’s Supper to honor the sacrifice Jesus had made on their behalf.
Now, why would they go out of their way – that at late at night - to have church?
Because they loved Jesus.
Have you ever seen a boy and girl in love? How often do they get together? That’s right, they meet whenever and wherever they can!!! You can’t hardly separate them. And when they can’t be together these days – what do they do? (I pulled out my phone) They text!!!
Why would they do that? Because they’re in love. If they stopped getting together whenever they could… they might drift apart and they don’t want that.
If you love Jesus you’ll find the time for Him. You’ll MAKE the time. But people who don’t make the time… they drift away from the love of Jesus.
If you can’t make it to church on Sunday morning, we have a Sunday night worship. If you can’t make it for that, call me any time of the day or night and we’ll get together and worship. But… you do realize you don’t need me to take communion. You don’t need me to worship. You don’t need this building to have church. All you need is to meet with a few Christians, get some crackers and grape juice, open your Bibles and pray.
CLOSE: Now it’s not like you’ll go to hell because you’ve missed a Sunday or 2. That’s not the issue. The issue is: the more STUFF you allow to clutter up your life, the farther you’ll drift from Christ. And my point is this: closeness to Jesus is what speaks of our love for Him. When we replace Jesus with something else even we should know we’ve stopped loving Him as we should.
To illustrate this, I’m going to read a popular poem. But I’m not going to apply it the way you’d think. I’m sure you know it. It goes like this:
ILLUS: One night I dreamed a dream.
As I was walking along the beach with my Lord.
Across the dark sky flashed scenes from my life.
For each scene, I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand,
One belonging to me and one to my Lord.
After the last scene of my life flashed before me,
I looked back at the footprints in the sand.
I noticed that at many times along the path of my life,
especially at the very lowest and saddest times,
there was only one set of footprints.
This really troubled me, so I asked the Lord about it.
"Lord, you said once I decided to follow you,
You'd walk with me all the way.
But I noticed that during the saddest and most troublesome times of my life,
there was only one set of footprints.
I don't understand why, when I needed You the most, You would leave me."
He whispered, "My precious child, I love you and will never leave you
Never, ever, during your trials and testings.
When you saw only one set of footprints,
It was then that I carried you.”
Did you know the poem? It’s called “Footprints” and it’s so popular that it people often use it as part their decorations of their home.
Now, why does that poem mean so much to people? Because it talks of God’s love for us. His love is so deep and powerful that He promises never to leave us or forsake us. He promises to always be near no matter what our circumstances are. And that promise from Scripture makes us feel good about God.
But now, think about that in reverse. What do you think God feels like when His people make the same commitment to Him? What do think He feels when we’ll do whatever is necessary to spend time with Him in Bible Study, Prayer and church?
He’d feel really good wouldn’t He? He’d feel your love for Him in a powerful and meaningful way. And that’s what we really want isn’t it?
INVITATION
