“Taming the Tongue”
James 3:1-12
Let me begin by asking you a question that you will probably prefer not to answer. When was the last time your mouth got you in trouble? Have you ever said something this you wish you had not? If I were to ask you what is the most hurtful thing anyone has ever done to you? I suspect you might describe some horrible words that were spoken to you. When we speak those kinds of words we often wish we could simply reach out and grab them and pull them back in. But as you know that’s impossible. Once we have spoken them the damage is done. We can say that’s not what I meant; what I meant to say was... Doesn’t matter. We can say well I was angry; I was emotional and we can even apologize but still the damage has been done.
All of this should remind us that in the area of relationships there may not be anything more important than learning to control our speech. James begins this passage by addressing those who are considering becoming Bible teachers. He says to them not many of you should be eager to become Bible teachers for this simple reason. You will be judged with more strictness. Bible teachers will be judged by God and also by those who hear them teach. James doesn’t say this to discourage those who want to teach, he simply wants all of us to take this responsibility seriously. The reason is simple. Our words have power and if you are in charge of a class in a place of leadership you have the capacity to shape lives. If you plan to teach you must be spiritually qualified. Teachers must practice what they teach. Teachers must be careful what they say with both their words and life. If a doctor neglects his own health; if an accountant can’t balance his checkbook; if an attorney violates the law it contradicts what they stand for. Likewise if a Bible teacher uses their words to tear down their students it contradicts what they stand for.
James continues to speak to the teacher but now he enlarges his audience as he says we all stumble in many ways. Notice here in verse two that James uses the word “we.” In other words, he too makes mistakes with his words. All of us do. At the same time we show our maturity when we control our tongue. The text here teaches that if a person disciplines his tongue he can control his whole body as well. If we can bring the tongue under control we will be able to keep other areas of life in check as well. In other words the tongue is pour biggest problem.
You see what we say and often what we don’t say are very important. Sometimes it is about saying the right words at the right time but it is also about controlling your desire to say something you shouldn’t. Let me give you a few examples of an untamed tongue. One that is out of control.
• When we Gossip
• When we are critical
• Bragging
• Manipulating
• false teaching
• complaining
• flattery
• lying
• spreading false words/rumors
Rumors have started through the years and many of them have been hard to stop. A rumor has been circulating since 1975, 45 years now, a rumor stating that Madelyn Marie O’Hare was trying to ban all religious programming. To take it all off radio and TV. Through the years I’ve had well-meaning people bring me one of these petitions for the congregation to sign. No such petition was ever filed with the FCC.
In 1997 someone started a rumor about Gerber products, the baby food company. Someone stated that Gerber had been involved in a class action lawsuit and would give a $500 check to families who have children and had used their products. Well who didn’t use Gerber baby food? Supposedly all the parents had to do to get the money was to send in a claim form with a copy of their child’s birth certificate by a certain date.
The rumor caught fire. Notices were posted in hospitals. Notes were sent home with children by school teachers. It was everywhere. Gerber posted notices on the Internet; tried to track down the rumors-called the media but in a three-week period before the deadline they received 18,000 phone calls and it ended up costing them millions of dollars. All because someone started a prank/a rumor.
How can something as small as the tongue cause so much damage? James gives us three illustrations of how this works.
Vs. 3 a horse by nature is wild. Unmanageable. To tame the horse James tells us that all you need to accomplish this task is a small bit and you place it into the horse’s mouth over its tongue. From that point on the rider pulls on the rains that are connected to the bit and the rider can control that massive animal. Horses are measured by the hand. A stallion could be 17 hands tall yet the six-inch bit can control him.
Verse 4. Take ships as an example. Now James could not imagine the huge ships of today but they still operate under the direction of a rudder. And by comparison to the size of the ship, the rudder is still very small.
Verse 5. Now what he does is that he summarizes the point of these two illustrations.
(1) Like the rudder and like the bit the tongue is small.
(2) Like the rudder and like the bit the tongue is powerful.
(3) Like the rudder and like the bit the tongue can accomplish great things or can cause great harm.
James says, “See how great a forest a small fire kindles!” He reminds us here that when the tongue is misused it is very similar to a fire when it spreads. Just a few words, just a spark can cause years of heartache. A few words can ruin a reputation. A few wrong words can wreck a friendship. With a few words you can embarrass, with a few words you can humiliate someone; with one statement we can destroy someone’s life. James in fact says no man can tame the tongue. It is always ready to pour out its deadly poison.
In verse 7 James mentions four different classes of animals... Those that walk, those that fly, those that crawl and those that swim. (Genesis 9:2.) Elephants can be tamed, snakes can be charmed, we can go to Sea world and see animals such as a whale, a porpoise, dolphins and see them being tamed yet we cannot tame our own tongues. He says the tongue is a restless evil, always busy causing problems.
Finally James tells us that the tongue has great potential to encourage and great potential to harm. Like many things it depends on how we use it. An old nursery rhymes says I lost a little word the other day, it was a very naughty word I had not meant to say, but then it was not really lost when from my lips it flew, my little brother picked it up and now he says it to.
David prayed in Psalm 141:3 set a guard Lord over my mouth: keep watch over the doors of my lips. James not only tells us that we send by what we say but that what we say reveals how sinful we are. Verses nine in 10.
It should bother us that we can praise God right now in less than an hour we can be cursing the driver who just cut us off in traffic. Verse 11 James compares our tong’s to a fountain. He asks “does a spring send forth fresh water and bitter water from the same opening? Can a fig tree produce olives? Our tongues have never been a model for consistency. ”Wouldn’t you think it strange if the apple tree in your yard started producing bananas? He gives us these thoughts but he doesn’t bother to draw any conclusions..... Because it’s obvious. It is all about this one word-consistency. In that area there was the Dead Sea which is salty, north of there you find fresh water. One spring can only produce one type of water. A tree produces one kind of fruit. We don’t go to an apple tree to get an orange. Nature is consistent. God is consistent. Our tongues are not.
Let me give you a few guidelines in this area. And I want you to know that these are directed to me as much as they are to you. This is an area where all of us struggle.
1. Never say anything about someone that you would not say to their face.
2. Never say anything hurtful about someone unless they are there to respond.
3. Refuse to listen to someone else gossip. Most gossip would end if we would simply refuse to hear it.
Ask the following questions:
T - is what I am about to say true?
H - is it helpful?
I - is it inspiring?
N - is it necessary?
K - is it kind?
When you go to your doctor, one of the first things they tell you to do is stick out your tongue. Because the tongue can tell them a lot about your physical condition. The tongue can also tell us a lot about our spiritual condition as well. It tells us what someone is like on the inside. Jesus said out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. The Chinese have a proverb that says what’s down in the well comes up in the bucket. We may say something and we think where in the world did that come from? It came from right here. It came from something hurtful someone said to you….years ago perhaps or it came from something you read or you heard. Something from television. A book. Whatever you fill yourself up with that is what is going to come out.
