Do you have any annoying people in your life?
A spouse does not count because in the “for better or for worse clause” we accepted certain irregularities.
Shelby shared a video with me this past week that I would like to share with you this morning. This video is of a South Carolina mother that has just begun the Summer Break with her daughter and as you will see, only three days into the break; she is already getting annoyed.
VIDEO: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p3kZQ1nN_kE
In our text this morning from I John we are reminded of the power of love. We are admonished to “love one another because love is from God and everyone who loves is born of God.”
I read a poem on the internet this past week. “To live above, with the saints in love, Ah! That would be glory! To live here below, with the saints that we know, now that is another story!”
Have you ever wondered or thought about why we get annoyed with people though? It is important to try to understand why we get our nose bent out of shape with people who drive us crazy.
I. I think that we get annoyed with people because we value the wrong things in life.
A. People matter- not things!
1. We read in the gospels that everywhere Jesus went the people were hanging on him. He touched lepers and bleeding women, he ate supper with tax collectors, the scum of society and He even spoke to a despised Samaritan woman –an outcast because she was not “one of us.”
2. Jesus surrounded Himself with annoying people, because people matter – not things!
3. We need to be concerned about “the things” in our life. The care of planet earth, the preservation of plants and animals, the art, literature and history of the human race all need to be honored and protected. But, Jesus did not come for mother Earth and though every creature is valued by the Creator, the crown of God’s creation is human kind not a spotted owl.
4. We know the destiny of the things on earth, II Peter 3:10 and following: “But the day of the Lord will come like a thief. The heavens will disappear with a roar; the elements will be destroyed by fire, and the earth and everything done in it will be laid bare. Since all these things are to be destroyed in this way, what sort of people ought you to be in holy conduct and godliness?
5. God looked at His creation in Genesis 2 and He said “It is good!” And He looked at humanity in John 3 and put His words into action: “For God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have eternal life.”
6. Every human being matters to God. Some of us may have been a surprise to our parents, but not to God. Only two things last forever according to Scripture, The Word of God and the Human Soul.
7. This morning, what has your attention, your devotion? What are the priorities of your life? If you value things more than people then you probably have a bumper crop of annoying people in your life because you value the wrong thing.
II. But we also get annoyed with people because they make us face our own insecurities – our own weaknesses!
A. We often times highlight the faults and failures of others that we want to hide in ourselves.
1. In I Corinthians 6 Paul asks us to look at our true selves and in so doing to
“Cut others some slack” for their failures. Then he lists some sins in verse 9 that those who practice will not inherit the Kingdom of God; fornicators, idolaters, adulators, homosexuals, thieves, drunkards, etc, but he concludes the chapter with this sobering truth, “And such were some of you…”
2. Maybe one reason we get so easily annoyed with people is we see in them a reflection of our own weakness and shortcomings and we want to distance ourselves from that truth, so we place on others the disdain we feel about ourselves.
3. Jesus died for every jerk you know and for the biggest jerk of all, me. Isn’t that what Paul was emphasizing in I Tim 1:15, “It is a trustworthy statement, deserving full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, among whom I am foremost of all.”
4. But wait, Paul is not finished. Listen to verse 16, “Yet for this reason I found mercy, so that in me as the foremost, Jesus Christ might demonstrate His perfect patience as an example for those who would believe in Him for eternal life.”
5. Annoying people challenge our own behavior and our own beliefs. At times I have found myself sitting in the stands watching a sporting event and being annoyed by the repeated cussing of a person behind me. He may have been cussing the team, or the refs, or whatever, but I found it terribly annoying.
6. But why was I annoyed? Yes, he was loud and obnoxious, with little respect for those around him and we can be justifiably annoyed by this kind of behavior, but mostly I was annoyed because as a Christian I felt like I needed to let him know that God’s last name was not damn it and that Jesus is the name of the Son of God and not a word to say when you are ticked at something or someone.
7. I was annoyed because I felt like my silence gave him approval for his behavior.
8. The annoying person who gets on our nerves is sometimes hiding a secret, an insecurity, a pain, etc. We need to try and look beyond and through their behavior to who the person really is.
III. But I think that we get annoyed with people also because respect is a lost art!
A. We need to treat people the way Jesus does.
1. In John 4 Jesus visits with a Samaritan woman who has come to the well to draw water and in the conversation that ensues He reveals that she has been married 5 times and that the man she is presently living with is not her husband.
2. But his words were not laced with contempt or ridicule. He
respects her as a human being, as a person of worth and challenges
her to be more than what she is, “Go and sin no more!”
3. There is a false teaching permeating our society today that says you and I must accept all lifestyles, that inclusivitiy means we accept each other’s differences.
4. Jesus always valued people but He never accepted sin. His call to
the Samaritan woman was to “go and sin no more.”
Illustration: Newspaper columnist and Minster George Crane tells of a wife who came into his office full of hatred toward her husband. “I do not only want to get rid of him, I want to get even. Before I divorce him, I want to hurt him as much as he has hurt me.” Dr. Crane suggested an ingenious plan, “Go home and act as if you really love your husband. Tell him how much he means to you. Praise him for every decent trait. Go out of your way to be as kind, considerate, and generous as possible. Spare no efforts to your undying love and that you cannot live without him, then drop the bomb. Tell him that you are getting a divorce.
That will really hurt him.” With revenge in her eyes, she smiled and exclaimed, “Beautiful, beautiful. Will he ever be surprised!” And she did it with enthusiasm. Acting “as if.” For two months she showed love, kindness, listening, giving, respect. When she didn’t return, Crane called. “Are you ready now to go through with the divorce?” Divorce?” she exclaimed. “Never! I discovered I really do love him.” Her actions had changed her feelings. Monition resulted in emotion. The ability to love is established not so much by fervent promise as often repeated deeds.
5. I wonder how many annoying people could be changed for Jesus if those of us who know Jesus treated them with respect and not disgust? If we loved them as Jesus loves them?
IV. But we also get annoyed with people because “to feel” means I have “to care” and we don’t always want to give it the time or energy that is required
A. Life’s greatest treasure is in relationships.
1. You and I have the power to help or to hurt another human being – to give them Jesus. But it means that we must be willing to sacrifice our time and our energy.
2. When I am really tired, I can get one of two ways. I can become as cranky as anyone you know or I can become as silly,- obnoxious is what Stacy calls it as anyone you know.
3. Stacy cannot stand it when I get silly because I like to tease her and I may laugh and laugh at things that she is annoyed with.
4. But in the relationship between a husband and wife you may feel like choking that spouse at times, but the investment that you promised to give included care, forgiveness and love. That does not mean you have to like all that your spouse does, but you are called upon to love him or her regardless.
Conclusion:
This morning who are the annoying people in your life? Someone at work? A neighbor perhaps? A total stranger? Maybe you!
I believe what every annoying person needs is someone to care, someone to try and understand; someone to go the distance with them.
“And by this they will know that you are my disciples in that you have love one for another.”
The challenge that I would extend to us is to be Jesus to the annoying people in our life.
Instead of expecting them to change to meet our standards; you change. Show them that you care, show them that they matter; show them how Jesus loves!
