Summary: How Jesus defined traditional marriage

Background:

• Very sensitive issue/very emotional

• The critical issue of redefining marriage. Ill: Sam & Fred desperately want to be married. They seek to find a way to lead the

charge to legalize marriage between people who love each other, no matter their sex. What is wrong with marrying the one you

love? Who does it hurt if two committed adults come together in holy marriage, like Sam and Fred and marry Jennifer? (Where

do you stop the redefining of marriage?)

• The rapid pace of social change has seemed to run over anyone in its path. In 1996 The Defense of Marriage Act was passed

overwhelming by both House and Senate and signed by President Clinton on the grounds that the defense of marriage was a

moral issue. Less than twenty years later, the majority of Americans (not in TN) seem to be for gay marriage.

• This morning’s message is not directed to the world, but rather directed to those who call themselves followers of Christ and thus

followers of God’s Word. It is safe to say that the redefining of marriage is here to stay; but the question this morning is where is a

Christian to stand, and how to we respond?

• It was no different in Jesus’ day. (How people say Jesus did not condemn homosexuality and or gay marriage, and yet they fail to

look closely and ignore Matthew 19). Read 19:3-12

I. The World Attempts to Re-define Marriage. (19:3,7)

• Notice, the Pharisees seek to trap Jesus in either being a marriage crasher or anti-Moses. And sure enough, when Jesus

takes one side, the Pharisees are quick to fling “OT/Moses command for granting divorce”. Ill: No difference today when the

world throws in our face polygamy in the Bible.

• Deception is always at the foundation of a redefining of marriage. The word “love” is thrown around like a cheap pair of sock;

in reality Jesus nails the heart of the matter – “a sinful culture breaks down marriage” (vs. 8)

• This proposed change is from “true traditional marriage” (true monogamy = one man & one woman for all time; to serial

monogamy = one man and one woman at a time)

II. The Word Affirms True Marriage. (19:4-6;8-9)

1. How Jesus could have answered:

• Financial reasons: Divorce is quit costly; two incomes are better than one

• Social justice: By divorcing you force a woman into instant poverty, that is not right. What about the rights of a woman?

• Family concerns: Think about the children, and how hard divorce has on them. Think about all the stress and worry you

will create.

• Love concerns: It is not good being in a loveless marriage; as long as he loves you it is ok to divorce and remarry.

2. How Jesus answered: Jesus goes back to creation for His argument not culture!

• Jesus affirms marriage as God intended! “From the beginning”

a. Jesus affirms the sexes: male & female

b. Jesus affirms the number: two Some say what about David, Solomon Jacob? How did that work for them?

c. Jesus affirms the duration of marriage: till death do they part. Jesus takes on marriage directly by putting himself

above the Law – “I say that the only reason for divorce is not because you are out of love but it one spouse proves

to be unfaithful with another person.”

- This passage doesn’t make gay people uncomfortable as much as divorced people.

- All groups of people are under God’s grace. We are all sexually broken people in every relationship possible.

- We cannot expect to be blessed and go against God’s Word.

III. The Witnesses Ambition to Pursue Holiness. (19:10-12)

1. Marriage is hard work. “Maybe it is better to be single”

• Some are born not to marry. (Naturally, mentally, physically can’t marry. This does not make them any less of a human

being)

• Some can’t marry because of what others have done to them. (society, environment, abuse)

• Some chose to be different and thus take themselves out of marriage.

2. Holiness is hard work. (monogamous marriage is not the standard, holiness is)

• Marriage is not for everyone, but holiness is (Christian).

• Singleness was never meant for a person to live for themselves, but to give themselves away in the service of Christ. (

1 Corinthians 7)

• Those who struggle with same sex attraction must pursue holiness just as a those who struggle with sexual addiction or

lust, or extra-marital affairs. One is not more sinful than another!

• Homosexuality is one of many things that we must lay at the foot of the cross and surrender. To follow the King is more

important than living whatever lifestyle makes us feel comfortable.

Conclusion: ILL: The standard that Christians should fight for is not to force everyone to live the way that makes us comfortable, but

rather to express to this world that we too are imperfect, sexual creatures, but man’s pursuit should be much higher than a

definition of marriage, but rather a pursuit of Holiness. It is not about being comfortable because you’re married to one

man or one woman; but in that relationship, does it live up to God’s standard?

• Do not minimize the sexual struggles that children, youth, and adults are facing. We never water down Biblical truth, but

we never refuse to offer hope to those who are struggling with their identity. “Made in the image of God to live in

holiness”

• Be sure before we point a finger at the world’s attempts to redefine marriage that you have a marriage that you would be

proud to mirror for the world.

• If we choose to marry, we must marry as Jesus affirms!