"Breakfast With Jesus"
John 21:1-19
A young man named Timothy writes: "I'm 23, I hate the way I look and I just hate myself as a person.
I honestly believe that no woman on the planet is attracted to me and I feel that a woman will never love me ever in my life."
An expert writes:
"Self-hate is evident in everyone on this planet.
A broad statement, yes, but we believe this to be true.
To one degree or another, everyone has lack of self-acceptance, lack of self-love.
Feelings of unworthiness are at the root of the self-hate patterns.
Self-hate keeps us from feeling loved by another.
We are frozen in unworthiness, often battering away at the stone with affirmations and behaviors to try to feel better about ourselves.
We exercise and diet and build careers and seek power or fame.
We wear makeup and hair gel and cologne, trying to hide the awful people we 'know' we are deep inside.
We seek lover after lover, trying to feel loved and special and valuable . . . but we never really FEEL it.
We drink and drug and sex, trying to dull the pain at the core of our bones that says 'unworthy'."
He goes on:
"The only way to heal the dark demon at the center of the SELF is to allow the feelings of self-loathing expression, in a safe place, and hopefully with someone who loves and can listen without judging."
The expert finishes by saying we must "Breathe In Love."
"And then let yourself rest in the arms of love, and know that you are worthy and valuable."
In the chapter just before our Gospel Lesson for this morning we are told that Jesus "breathed on" the disciples and said, "Receive the Holy Spirit."
And in the Book of Acts we are told that Jesus remained on the earth forty days following His Resurrection.
And according to John, those days were filled with activity.
John said, "Jesus did many other signs in the presence of his disciples."
Jesus already appeared to His disciples on Easter day.
He returned when Thomas was there and allowed him to touch the nail marks in His hands and put his hand into His side.
Last week we talked about how Jesus appeared to two other disciples on "the road to Emmaus."
And they ran and told the other disciples: "The Lord really has risen!"
So, why did Jesus continue to appear and appear to His followers for 40 days after the first Easter?
I would say it is Grace-plus some!!!
Those forty days were the basis for the apostles' ability to endure the most severe suffering, self-doubt, and--yes--even self-hatred!!!
They had, after all, all deserted Him in His most desperate time of need.
They had "betrayed" Him.
And they felt horrible about themselves.
Experts say that "self-hatred or self-loathing" can often be linked to "guilt for someone's own actions that he or she views as wrongful."
So, even after the disciples were able to rejoice and believe that "Jesus is Alive," it took time for them to heal and become strong enough to become His messengers.
Healing does take time, does it not?
And we serve a patient, loving and understanding God Who knows us and what we need better than we know ourselves!!!
Luke wrote: "After his suffering, [Jesus] showed himself to these [men and women] and gave many convincing proofs that he was alive.
He appeared to them over a period of forty days and spoke about the kingdom of God."
Author and theologian Leonard Sweet writes: "Had it not been for those forty days, faith in Jesus' resurrection would have had a weak foundation.
Had it not been for those forty days, the disciples would have continued to misunderstand the Scriptures.
During those forty days, Jesus opened up their understanding as He spoke of Himself from Genesis to Malachi, expounding the kingdom of God."
Sweet continues, "The forty days also established a new way of knowing Christ, a way that was not after the flesh but after the Spirit.
Recall that when the disciples first saw Jesus in His resurrected state, 'some doubted.'
But in the course of those forty days, Jesus revealed to His followers a new way of knowing Him--a way that would carry forward after His ascension, where believing without seeing became the norm."
This morning we find the disciples, who have already "seen" the Resurrected Christ, together and they don't seem to be very animated or motivated, shall we say.
They are at "the Sea of Tiberius," and after some time, Peter in what reads like a kind of dejected manner, off-handedly says: "I'm going fishing."
It doesn't sound like Peter was feeling very worthy or valuable.
Could there have been a "hint" of self-loathing holding him captive?
Do you suppose he was depressed?
What do you do when you are feeling sad and depressed?
Do you return to a routine that once brought you comfort?
Do you sort of "go through the motions of life" without much enthusiasm or zest?
It appears that Peter wasn't the only one who was feeling depressed.
After Peter said, "I'm going fishing," the other disciples said, "We'll go with you."
And we are told that "they set out in a boat, but throughout the night they caught nothing."
Remember how, last month, when we were studying John, we noted several times that John uses the metaphors of "darkness" and "light" over and over again in deeply symbolic ways.
And night, in the Gospel of John, symbolizes separation from God.
And there is no sadder place to be than in the "night" of "separation."
So the disciples fished "all night long," in the darkness, and "they caught nothing."
But then, when the morning came, and the day began to dawn...
...and the light started to shine, "Jesus stood on the shore."
He instructed them to "Cast [the] net on the right side of the boat..."
"So they did and there were so many fish that they couldn't haul in the net."
We can try and live our lives in the darkness.
We can try and be happy living in separation from God.
But it doesn't work.
It never has and never will.
Humankind cannot be at peace without a living relationship with God.
And we cannot even begin to love ourselves until we come to know how much we are loved!!!
In 1 John Chapter 4 we are told: "This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins."
We are also told that "God is love."
And that "There is no fear in love."
I was listening to an older man give his testimony this past week.
He's been in church most of his life.
And he's talked to a number of people about God.
One person asked him, "Who or what is God?"
And, although he had led a life of faith, this question stumped him.
So, he went and told a friend about this person's question.
His friend told him, "Oh, that's easy. The Bible tells us Who God is. God is Love."
The man said that this changed his life!!!
Who is God?
God is LOVE!!!
If you know that, that is the most important thing you can know!!!
Do you know that?
Do you know that God loves you?
Do you know that God loves you no matter what you have done, what you look like, what others have said about you, or how others have tried to define you?
Do you know that God loves you even if you do not or cannot seem to love yourself?
Is there any better news in the universe?!!!
So, Peter and the other disciples had seen the Resurrected Christ, on a few occasions already.
Thomas had touched His hands and sides.
But they still could not come to love themselves or forgive themselves for having deserted Him in His darkest hour.
So here they are fishing in the dark--catching nothing!!!
And then the light dawns and Jesus stands on the shore--and they catch so many fish "that they couldn't haul in the net."
Then when John recognizes that its Jesus standing on the shore, giving them fishing instructions, "Simon
Peter...jumped into the water."
And when they got to the shore Jesus was cooking them breakfast.
What an act of love this is in and of itself!!!
I know it's Mother's Day.
How many of you have fond memories of your mother cooking breakfast for you?
As a matter of fact, the first meal we ever experience comes from our mothers...
...the first act of love which we experience comes from our mother's feeding us.
And so, in love, Jesus feeds His disheartened, desperate, isolated, self-loathing disciples.
And we are told that the disciples "knew it was the Lord."
Still, when they finished eating, Jesus asked Simon Peter: "Simon son of John, do you love me...?"
Don't you think Jesus knew Peter loved Him?
Why would Jesus ask him these questions?
Could it be that Peter had to hear himself say it?
Could it be that Peter had to be asked in order to "know"?
In 1 John 4 we are told, "love is from God, and everyone who loves is born from God and knows God.
The person who doesn't love does not know God, because God is love."
So Jesus asks Peter, "Do you love me?"
"Do you love me?"
"Do you love me?"
And each time, Peter says: "Yes, Lord, you know I love you."
Do you know that God loves you?
We can say it, but do we really believe it?
It can take time and experience to really come to believe it.
Jesus asks Peter if he loves Him 3 times.
Of course, this directly corresponds with the number of times Peter denied Jesus.
And each time Peter tells Jesus, "Lord, you know everything; you know I love you," Jesus gives Peter a job to do: "Feed my lambs," "Take care of my sheep," "Feed my sheep."
We really can't be happy in life if we do not know the love of God.
And we really cannot know the love of God unless we are actively engaged in what God is doing.
When we, along with the community of faith, put God's love into action...
...when we become part of what's going on...
...when we help feed the hungry, when we give a tenth of our income to God's work, when we help cloth the poor, when we visit the sick and those in prison, when we minister to Jesus' sheep, His lambs, we come to know Him and experience His love in such ways that we wouldn't trade serving in Christ's name for all the money in the world!!!
When we love others, we come to find that we can actually love ourselves!!!
That's the way God has set it up.
When we are being selfish or self-consumed...
....when we are doing everything for, me, myself and I...
...when we are out only for "number one"...
...how could we possibly love ourselves?
When we come to love others, not only in words, but in deeds--with total commitment--we come to love who we are, and we come to truly, truly learn to know the love of God, and the peace of God which surpasses all understanding!!!
In verse 18 Jesus tells Peter that he will actually give his entire life in service to Christ.
And not only his entire life--but he will be killed because of his love for Christ.
And then "after saying this, Jesus said to Peter, 'Follow me.'"
And Peter follows.
You know why?
Love is the One Thing worth dying for.
And God is Love!!!!
The most common and the most deadly disease known to humankind is self-loathing or self-hatred.
This disease causes us to do everything from slitting our own wrists to killing our own family members, classmates, co-workers, spouses, strangers--you name it.
But thank the Lord there is a cure!!!
There is One Cure!!!
And that One Cure is God, Who is Love!!!
Do you love Jesus?
Feed His lambs.
Do you love Jesus?
Take care of His sheep.
Do you love Jesus?
Feed His sheep.
Follow Him!!!
