Memorial Service for Brian McKay
Good afternoon. I am David Henderson and I am the pastor of Eagle’s Landing Baptist Church here in Port Richey. We are grateful for the life of Brian McKay and very pleased that our military is here to help honor his life.
Scripture/Psalm 23 Today we find ourselves in the valley of the shadow of death that the Psalmist talked about…..it is a difficult place to be but as the psalmist talks about it is also a place where we can experience the presence of God. One of the things I have discovered through the years is that we are never really completely ready to lose someone who we are close to. I have stood here and helped with services for people who were very young, in the prime of their lives and as well for many who may have lived to be 100 plus years and in neither case is the family ready. Nor do we understand God’s timing. So one of the questions we often ask at the time of losing a loved one is why? We cannot help it but we often ask why things happen as they do. David asked why ... in Psalm 22 ... David had faced death as well. Paul the apostle said now we see thru a dark glass….it’s not clear but one day we will see face to face...he was saying it is not all clear now but one day it will be...there are things we do not understand right now but one day we will understand...that day according to Paul will be when we see Jesus Christ face to face. I look forward to that day.
A college professor tells the story of being invited to speak at a military base. A soldier named Ralph was sent to meet him at the airport. After they introduced themselves they headed toward the baggage claim area and as they were walking down the concourse Ralph kept disappearing, once to help an older woman whose suitcase had fallen open, once to lift up two toddlers so they could see Santa Claus, and again to give directions to someone who was lost. Each time he came back with a big smile on his face.
The professor asked him, “where did you learn to live like that?” Ralph said, “During the war, I guess.” He said on my last tour of duty, it was my job to detect mines, and he said I watched as several on my friends were killed right before my eyes. So I learned to live between steps. I never knew whether the next step would be my last, so I learned to get everything I could out of the moment between when I picked up my foot and put it down again. Every step I took was a whole new world, and I guess I’ve been living that way ever since.”
Too many times our lives are spent around the area of setting big goals and achieving big things unfortunately we don’t always reach those goals. We are always looking at the long view of life and we fail to pay attention to the daily tasks/jobs that God places in front of us. Too often we fail to live between steps. To just take life one day at a time as Brian McKay did. “This is the day the Lord has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.” Psalm 118:24.
It seems to me Pat that as you described your husband Brian to me in detail today that this is the way that he lived. And I believe it is the way that you have lived as well. It would be good for all of us to live this way. When Brian McKay, at the youthful age of 23 developed an aneurism he knew he had to resign from the military. He had finished an associate degree in college. He had become a Captain in the Army but now it was time to take a step back. But he chose his steps carefully. He chose not to resign from life. He was an over comer and Pat so are you. He was told they his years would be limited and that he might not live very long but he chose not to accept that and he lived for another 40 years. He was married for almost 41 years, would be 41 in August. You were told that you would not be able to have children, yet Dallas and Leah are here today as a testimony of God’s goodness and Pat you have 3 beautiful grandchildren.... all girls. Your proved the doctors wrong. Both of you chose to live life in the moment and make each day count. You are to be commended for your positive attitude and for the courage you had to face life and make the most of this challenge you were facing.
Brian loved sports. Tennis, golf, boating, fishing. Lots of guy stuff. He loved to hang out with other men. He also worked in a auto body shop doing repairs. He worked at a marina so he could stay active with his boat. When Operation desert Storm came around in 1991 he hoped that he would be called to serve. That is where his heart was and I am told that he was disappointed that he was not called. Pat told me that Captain McKay was always interesting. He was never boring. He was good with conversation and he was deeply loved by all of you I know. I am very sorry today for your loss.
Counselors tell us there are 3 things we need when we lose someone we love. (1) time -doesn’t usually happen quickly...the grief process takes time..so don’t try tp rush it...sometimes a few months....sometimes a few years. It is different with each person. (2) talk- share memories, stories, talk is therapeutic. (3) Tears- when Jesus learned of the death of His friend Lazarus the scripture tells us that Jesus wept. Tears are O.K.
The Bible tells us a bit of what heaven will be like.
...there will be no more death
...we will never grow tired
...no sorrow
...no pain
...no darkness or night
...no need for the Sun...... Jesus will provide all the light that we need
...there will be no end….it will last forever
there will be no more disappointments, problems or difficulties no addictions.. The Bible describes it as a perfect place....no more cancer, disease or seizures or seizures of any kind! And the Bible tells us that if we commit our lives to Christ then Heaven will be our future home.
John 14:1-6 Catherine Marshall in her book beyond ourselves tells the story of a friend of hers whose teenage son died of diabetes before insulin was discovered. He asked her one day, mommy what does it feel like to die? Not knowing what to say she ran into the kitchen pretending to be doing something at the stove and she said Lord tell me what to tell my son. She said Kenneth you remember just a few years ago when you would play so hard that when you would come in you would fall into mama and daddy’s bed. You didn’t undress you just fell asleep, but then the next morning you would wake up and you would find your self in your own bed, in your own room, where you belong. That was because your father would come along with his strong arms and would lift you up and carry you to where you belong. She said...that is what death is like. Our heavenly father comes along and he carries us to the room where we belong. In my father’s house there are many mansions/rooms.
Prayer...heavenly Father we are reminded of the time that your friend Lazarus died and we find the simple words in the scripture that tell us that you wept. We are grateful that you are a God that has feelings...one that cares for us in our darkest moments…..one who knows all our feelings ...all our needs and you have the answers and the hope that we need. Today I pray for each member of this family asking you to comfort them guide them and help them though this difficult time. I pray that would you show then just how real that you are and how much you love them and that they would sense your presence with them in a powerful way today and in the months to come. I pray for your comfort and for your blessings on them...in Jesus name....Amen.
