HoHum:
Sonja R. Ely- I was watching my 5 year old granddaughter Christy play with her dolls. At one point, she “staged” a wedding, her being the bride and her teddy bear was the groom. She picked him up and said to the “minister” presiding over the wedding, “Now you can read us our rights. Without missing a beat, Christy became the minister who said, “You have the right to remain silent, anything you say can be held against you, you have the right to an attorney. You may kiss the bride.” This is a cute and innocent illustration, but it helps to show us how far marriage has degenerated in our society.
Thesis: Let’s go over Matthew 19:3- 6 phrase by phrase and learn some things about the bedrock of the home, marriage
For instances:
1. Some Pharisees came to him to test him- vs. 3
“Then the Pharisees went out and laid plans to trap him in his words.” Matthew 22:15, NIV.
2. “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?”- vs. 3
A. This is a question that the rabbis often debated. The main crux of the matter comes from Deuteronomy 24:1: “If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house...”. This is specifically talking about remarriage issues but no matter the debate was centered on this phrase: “Something displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her”- This phrase is difficult to interpret and understand. Many interpretations of this. One popular one was that the something indecent covered anything even burning dinner. This is the point of the question, “any and every reason”.
B. No matter what interpretation, in the end, every way of getting out of a marriage was acceptable. Man would write out a certificate of divorce and send the woman on her way. Many women always wore expensive jewelry so that if divorce did happen, they would be able to sell the jewelry and provide for themselves for a time. Women had little say in the matter
Many times the Rabbis taught from the Scriptures but they would teach what Rabbi so and so interpretation of the passage was. Jesus did not teach this way. “When Jesus had finished saying these things, the crowds were amazed at his teaching, because he taught as one who had authority, and not as their teachers of the law.” Matthew 7:28, 29, NIV.
3. “At the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female”- vs. 4
This comes from Genesis 1:27 on Day 6 of Creation, the creation of mankind. Why did he make them males and females? Tells us in next verse. “God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. ” Genesis 1:28, NIV.
4. ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’?- vs. 5
A. This comes from Genesis 2, the description of the first man and woman. Adam named all of the animals but for him no suitable helper was found- Genesis 2:20. The word for suitable means one who corresponds with the other, one who complements the other, one who fits into another. Male and female need one another because they are different. The female has some things to offer that the male doesn’t have. The male has some things to offer that the female does not have. Not only do males need females, but the world at large needs the balance. This is built into Creation. Move in our day to deny this. Does not work. Not going to let my boys play with toy guns. Took bread sticks and pretended they are guns.
B. This goes against the homosexual agenda. Two males do not fit each other, two females do not fit each other. They do not compliment each other physically, emotionally, or in personality.
C. “So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman’, for she was taken out of man.” For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” Genesis 2:21-24, NIV. From that point on, a man and a woman leave their family, father and mother, and are united in marriage to each other.
1. Leave- must cut the aprons strings to mom and dad. This is about prioritizing our spouse over parents, children, siblings, and friends. Our spouse should be our best friend.
2. Cleave- The word cleave means to join fast together, to glue, or cement. Cleaving to each other primarily means commitment to each other. In modern language, this means the “I Dos” in wedding vows. For better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death; as God is my witness, I give you my promise.
Weave- The two will become one flesh. Minds are united, emotions are united, purpose is united, and the bodies are united. Physical part of the relationship, sexual intimacy, sexual intercourse. This act weaves the two together. One in heart and body. This cannot happen in a homosexual relationship. As a matter of fact, between two men it ruins the bowels.
5. So they are no longer two, but one- vs. 6
“All the believers were one in heart and mind. No-one claimed that any of his possessions was his own, but they shared everything they had.” Acts 4:32, NIV. Good advice to have everything together. It is a partnership. Partners share the profits.
The church shares in Christ. the Christian couple shares in Christ and also in the marital bond.
“then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose.” Philippians 2:2, NIV.
Christians looking for mates, must be fellow believers. “A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.” 1 Corinthians 7:39, NIV.
6. Therefore what God has joined together- vs. 6
A. Joined here is the word for yoke. When two are put into the same yoke, they keep their own personalities and bodies (like the church), but they become a single team.
B. Notice that God has joined them together. At the first marriage, God was the one who presided over it and He is the one who made them for each other. This is a God ordained marriage, one man + one woman, together for life.
C. Notice that the government had nothing to do with it. No matter what the government says, this is God’s formula for marriage. The government can redefine marriage all it wants (bad idea for society) but this is God’s way for marriage. Think about this. What is more important, to have relationship recognized by the state, or to have relationship recognized by God.
D. For many years until the 1500’s, governments did not require a couple to have a marriage license. The important thing was that the two families agreed and that the church agreed on the marriage (remember Romeo and Juliet, still in many marriage services the father gives the bride away). For the most part, the state was not involved. In the United States, a marriage license was unheard of until the middle of the 1800’s. In our day, a big issue is benefits. Need to have the government recognize the marriage so that benefits can be given to a spouse. Legally recognize the union. Now, as long as man’s law doesn’t contradict God’s law, we need to follow man’s law. A preacher in Milwaukee is advocating not having a marriage license from the state. This preacher makes a good point. He says this, “Some have said to me, "If someone is married without a marriage license, then they aren't really married." Given the fact that states may soon legalize same-sex marriages, we need to ask ourselves, "If a man and a man marry with a State marriage license, and a man and woman marry without a State marriage license - who's really married? Is it the two men with a marriage license, or the man and woman without a marriage license?”
E. Must recognize that the first marriage had nothing to do with government. "With This Ring I Thee Wed" pamphlet published by the Ohio State Bar Association. The opening paragraph under the subtitle "Marriage Vows" states, "Actually, when you repeat your marriage vows you enter into a legal contract. There are three parties to that contract. 1.You; 2. Your husband or wife, as the case may be; and 3. the State of Ohio." We are missing someone very important and that is God. In a traditional marriage service, God is mentioned at least 13 times; Jesus Christ is mentioned at least 7 times; and Scriptures are mentioned throughout.
7. Man not separate- vs. 6
Malachi 2:14-15: “the LORD is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant. Has not the LORD made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring” Goes down to Matthew 19:13-15
Debra Johnson- My 7 year old daughter wanted to take violin lessons, so I took her to a music store to rent an instrument. Hoping she would understand the importance of practicing, I explained that violin lessons were expensive so she would have to work hard. “There may be times when you feel like giving up,” I said, “but I want you to hang in there and keep on trying.” She nodded and then in her most serious voice said, “It will be just like marriage, right Mommy?”
