The Comfort whereby I Am Comforted
2 Corinthians 1:3-6
It was a parking lot like any other, no unusual obstructions, no special problem places. There might have been a slight unevenness in the pavement, but that’s pretty normal, no real problem.
The day before Dad had clambered some of the less problematic places on Otter Peak in Acadia National Park. He didn’t take undue chances. After all, he had a knee replacement in January, so he’s careful. Later that day, we had climbed many steps down a hillside to reach the rocks on the beach next to Bass Harbor lighthouse. It was not a simple climb and he did ok. Again, it was a challenge, and he didn’t take chances, so he reached a decent vantage point from the rocks and got a good view.
Make no mistake, this is rugged terrain. The Maine coast and the adjoining country is broken and tumbled with huge granite boulders. To climb this stuff is safe, if you’ve got all your limbs working right. I have no limitations in this way, and I took a tumble of my own down these rocks. Not fun.
But Dad didn’t. He walked on the rocks, but it was in an asphalt parking lot, checking his oil like a responsible car owner that his foot caught in a random accident, and he fell.
He’s had problems with that hip. His doctor had told him he would need to change it out someday, but not yet. The other side was fine, so if he had fallen that direction, there would have been no cause for alarm.
But he fell, and broke his hip, and needed emergency hip surgery. They decided a replacement was the best option and he was in and out of surgery the same day. The diagnosis was immediate and the prognosis was decisive. It was broken, not dislocated. There was no possibility of a painful but quck fix. He would have to have surgery, no doubt about it.
What do you do? You’re in another state, a day’s drive out when everything’s fine. We’re even from two different places. And everything is not fine and this is a serious problem. He cannot go home, and we are called upon to figure out the best way we can help. This is an emergency if we’ve ever had one.
Questions arise:
• Why did this happen?
• Is Dad going to recover fully?
• What will we do now?
• How can we afford to deal with this problem?
Our lives are peppered with problems. Pain is part of life in this fallen world. We cannot bemoan the fact that we have pain in our lives, that is the human condition. If we face it well, that is the Christian condition.
God gives us tools to cope. One of those tools is each other. In the larger sense, we can cope with our troubles because other people cope with theirs, some with Christ and some without, but people cope. It is an advantage we have in Christ that our redemption begins a process of change in us we call the Fruit of the Spirit. Among the fruit are virtues like: love, kindness and gentleness. These are relational virtues that teach us the best way to interact with each other. Some of us have a strong value of the Truth, but could use some additional relational skills. But these things take time and we must give ourselves over to the working of the Spirit to see them perfected in us.
In keeping with these fruit is a statement made by Paul
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. (2 Corinthians 1:3-6)
So, though Paul was talking about persecution, there is no reason to assume that this principle does not apply to other kinds of hardship. In that light I want to share our spiritual experience in this crisis, to be a comfort to you and to help you see what we did that might be helpful to you.
There is a danger here, of course. Paul did not shrink from it, and today, neither will I. The danger is that by sharing how something happened, and what I believe God did in our life, I sound proud, like I am recommending myself as a model. I am not. I am blessed to have been given God’s grace over the past week and that is what I am sharing.
This is what we found
The problem was bad but it was not as bad as it could have been
I do not want to minimize Dad’s trouble. He is in pain and is severely limited in his movement. He is dealing with financial and physical difficulties totally unlike mine and Dawn’s.
But he is younger than many who fall and break hips and so his possibilities are much better than they would be otherwise. There was a really good hospital with a specialization in joint replacement in the same town, less than a couple miles away. We might have been in a much more remote location as we had been only a couple days before. It might have happened while Dad was at home alone with nobody nearby to help.
It would be stupid for us to act like nothing was wrong. It certainly is and was. Not just for Dad’s sake, but the emotional, professional, financial stress it places on Dawn and me are considerable. The questions above are not answered by looking at the ways in which the situation could have been worse. And another person telling us how much worse it could have been would not have been helpful at all. In fact, others recognizing the seriousness of our position (not sappy sympathy mind you, but a recognition that we were in crisis) was very reassuring.
Only God knows what might have been, so worrying about those things is pointless. But a recognition that He is in control and so He is working out a plan is important at all times is vitally essential.
What is that plan? I have no idea. I may never know. He might not even choose to tell me in eternity. That’s His option.
And that is the nature of Faith. It is trust that God knows and that He will work all things out. It may not be today or tomorrow or even in my sphere of recognition at all. Who knows? He does and that’s what’s important.
There’s a sentence of Scripture that helps us in these times, if we know the Scripture and believe it. Mind you, it’s not a verse that’s meant to be our word of comfort for anybody else, it’s God’s word of comfort to us when we see it for what it is, a promise from God that the troubles of this fallen existence are temporary. But the sentence is only helpful if we recognize that reality and believe it fully.
We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently. In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will. And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:22-28 NIV)
Do you get that? God sent Jesus here not just to redeem our spirits, but our bodies as well. In fact, He is redeeming all creation. But this is happening in His own time and way. For us that requires a level of patience. When we are in a position to exercise that patience then we are in a position to hear the promise that even these terrible things will work together for the good of God’s people. The pain we suffer and the anxiety that comes upon us, the trouble we face is symptomatic of the fallen world. It’s like Jesus coming has set a potential for ultimate good in the whole of the fallen creation. That goodness is like a child waiting to be born and the pain and trouble we face in this life is like labor pain.
• Dad’s suffering today is painful but it is a sign of hope
• My own complications over the next week are signs of hope
• Dawn’s emotional pain over the situation of her dad is a sign of hope
Just like a woman’s labor pain means a life is about to be born, the trouble you face is a sign that God has something good in store for His people.
Now here’s the kicker. If somebody is in pain and you tell them that, they’re likely to be moved with a sudden desire to slap you up side the head. Paul is saying this to the Romans as he experiences trouble and while they are at peace. He can say it because it’s what he, the man suffering, believes. He can say it to them to prepare them for a time when they too will suffer. It’s not a comfort but a reassurance for those who know others who need comfort. It’s something to be known, not to be lightly said.
So, if our situation had been worse, it still would have been true. We might not have readily recognized it, and there may be times even now when it is not in the forefront of our thinking, but it is true nevertheless. Whatever has happened has happened for a reason that is directly connected to God’s redemption of Dad, of Dawn, of me, of you, of His friends and family in PA, of all His creation. As good or as bad as it was is directly related to His plan and that’s got to be good for something.
A direct result of the faith that comes from hope is keeping an optimistic outlook
If you know me very well at all, you know I am not a positive thinker. I can be very negative at times. This is a flaw in my character. I think a steadfast faith engenders a positive outlook based upon a firm trust in God. Even when things are going badly, there are good things to find in our circumstances. I’m not talking about mindless wishful thinking, or some strange “Christian Science” doctrine that says positive thinking will make things be positive. No, I’m talking about remaining upbeat and looking for the path of progress through a situation.
Negative, pessimistic thinking will sap your energy, drain your faith and block your perspective from seeing productive courses of action. Optimism and faith are so related though, it seems like repeating myself. I just want to emphasize that when it is functioning at its best, faith breeds a realistic optimism, and that optimism is essential to coping with troubles.
Give space to your true feelings
If you are frightened or saddened or frustrated, you must be able to admit to those feelings. Do not try to over-ride them with blustery self-confidence. Notice that I have been expounding on how faith, that is, Confidence in God helps to breed a positive outlook. We must admit at the same time that this is not the same as self-confidence. When we look inside at times like this what we see is a profound smallness. Standing on top of Mount Cadillac last week, I felt a bit of that insignificance. It’s like looking out at the whole world, where one of the largest cruise ships I’ve seen where hundreds of people are living at the moment, is reduced to the size of the head of a pin. And I am smaller still. From their vantage point, they can’t even see me at all.
We feel that way in the face of our troubles and our own inability to solve them. It leads to grief. It makes us angry at ourselves and sometimes at God. It makes us desperate, It makes us sad. J.R.R. Tolkien has said one thing that I think has broad general applicability. “Not all tears are an evil.” We must not shrink back from expressing our own emotion. We must not become wrapped up in it, but we must give space for it in the midst of all the other things we must do in a crisis. It’s ok. Even if you’re a man.
We had to keep our heads about us
As Christians we are called to react in a way that is not like the world’s reaction. So, even though we may have been alarmed by the situation, it helps nothing for us to panic, to become angry, to indulge in depression, to engage in a blame game. These things are simply not conducive to problem solving.
Part of faith is knowing that God is there to help. Prayer is an important element of how we are called to respond. An expression of faith that God is in control is incompatible with an accusation that somebody else is at fault.
Don’t get me wrong, people do crazy stuff and everyone should be held accountable for their actions. If somebody had clearly caused the problem we had, then it would have been right to see their culpability in the bigger picture. That is one of the things working too. But that was not the case. It often is not.
• Accidents happen
• people’s bodies break down
• it’s not the fault of the healer but of mortality itself
unintended consequences arise
Sometimes it’s just a bad confluence of unrelated factors that causes something bad to happen. In this Solomon was right:
I have seen something else under the sun: The race is not to the swift or the battle to the strong, nor does food come to the wise or wealth to the brilliant or favor to the learned; but time and chance happen to them all. (Ecclesiastes 9:11 NIV)
As Christians we’re a little iffy about the word “luck”, but Solomon was not afraid of recognizing that sometimes, stuff just happens. Rather than seeing it as “bad luck” though, we are called to ask, “does God have a purpose?” Never the less, in this case we must allow that the Ramada Inn suffered a bit of ill chance that day, and they were not at fault, and neither was the paver, or the maker of the paving equipment, or Chevy, or the oil company that refines Dad’s WD-40. So the possibility of a lawsuit should not jump to mind in cases like this, and it didn’t.
Also, we were staying a place that was priced well for three days, but not for three weeks. We knew if Dawn was going to stay, she would have to relocate and she immediately began researching good options, and, thankfully, found one. You can’t do that if you’re panicking.
I’m not saying Dawn and I reacted in the only prescribed Godly way to react, but I will say that if you are facing trouble, it is better to let logic rule than emotion. I’m not silly enough to think that all emotion can or should be controlled all the time, but you should do what you can, and when you have a choice between a decision based on emotion and one based on reason, choose the reasoned approach. Emotion is a powerful enough influence on our actions without giving it free reign in times of crisis.
Accept help
When you are confronted with unusual circumstances, you must not try to cope with them in usual ways. Think about that for a moment. If we want to pry a board loose we might use a screw driver. But if we have a bigger piece of wood, we need a crowbar. You can’t do unusual work with the usual tools. Your life is yours to manage. Remember, you plan your path, but God devises your steps.
Last Tuesday, one of the steps God planned for Dad was to catch his toe and break his hip. The steps he planned for Dawn and me were to guide the car to the hospital rather than south toward Portland. We could not do what was required of us by holding on to our original schedule and budget, those tools no longer fit the job.
I would not be home for Wednesday evening re:Fresh and Dawn would not be able to devote herself to work at AFC.
As a result
• Someone offered to cover Wednesday evening
• Someone offered to cover Dawn’s calls
• Someone offered to feed our cat
• Someone offered us a reduced rate hotel for a couple days
• Someone offered the use of their business center
• Someone else let both of us stay for two nights while paying for only one
• Someone offered to take Sunday service if necessary
• Someone offered to pick me up at the airport
This was help offered knowing that we were unprepared for what happened. In some cases it was people who knew or could imagine what it would be like to be in our circumstances. Others were God’s people stepping up to do God’s work, supporting their co-workers in the Faith.
It is unwise and prideful to reject help at times like this. We are called to do what we can for ourselves:
Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else, for each one should carry his own load. (Galatians 6:4-5 NIV)
It is healthy and good for our own emotional well being to do what we can for ourselves, but we should also not reject special help in special situations.
because he almost died for the work of Christ, risking his life to make up for the help you could not give me. (Philippians 2:30 NIV)
Paul accepted help when he was in dire straits and even when people put themselves out to help him, he did not deny them that blessing.
It’s a delicate balance sometimes, to judge what we should do for ourselves for ourselves and what we should get help with. But one thing is for certain, when you are in extraordinary circumstances, ordinary measures will not suffice, and people receive a blessing from God for being servants. It is wrong to deny them that.
The word comfort in the New Testament also has the connotation of encouragement and exhortation. I am encouraging you today, thanking you and encouraging you. When I was in need, God’s people stepped up to help. Faith sustained Dawn and me in our time of trouble. God helped us to think and do what needed to be done. His hope was a blessing.
