Sermon for 6/20/2010 Father’s Day
Proverbs 23
Introduction:
A. My family attended a home school conference near Baton Rouge and one workshop from that really stuck with me. It was exclusively for fathers. The workshop leader is the father of a home school family. His wife teaches his children. He holds a high level government job that takes a lot of his time and energy.
B. He asked a simple question that really applies to fathers (but also to every parent): “What is a father to do?” Most fathers work full time (and many mothers) and many times are tired when they get home. What is a father’s role and what can they do?
C. Some people in our society say that males are no longer necessary. They are useful when it comes to reproduction but beyond that, what good are they? Ken Canfield, founder and president of the National Center for Fathering, once asked a stadium full of men, “Are fathers necessary or optional? Do dads have a unique and important contribution to make in the lives of their children?” The crowd grew quiet. He sensed that many of them had experienced firsthand the emptiness a young boy feels when his father is not involved in his life. Ken went on to say that he believes men possess more power through healthy fathering than in any other area of their lives. “As we consider who will be the real heroes of the coming generation, I’m convinced that fathers like you and me have a great opportunity – to shape the destiny of America one young life at a time.”
D. To answer, look at 2 Samuel 10:9-13 in the KJV. Vs. 12- Let us play the men.
E. What is this saying? Joab is saying that we will play the part of the men. So many times in the history of Israel, the men just didn’t show up. This is the problem today, men just don’t show up. If they would just show up and act like men, be responsible and take seriously their role as men, then a lot of the problems of our society would melt away. As Christian men, we need to play the part of men even for those families where the man doesn’t show up. Men make a big difference.
F. What role does the man play? If nothing else he teaches valuable life skills. He teaches things that cannot be taught in the classroom.
G. The ladies have a chapter in the Bible and that is Proverbs 31. Talk about a chapter in Proverbs that can really apply to the men.
Thesis: There are some skills that are talked about in Proverbs 23 that men can teach their children.
For instances:
1. In eating
A. Proverbs 23:1-3.
1. Yes, men need to teach their children good table manners.
2. Men need to teach their children about self restraint and self control.
B. Proverbs 23:20-21 as it applies to eating. We must control our animal instincts. Use moderation and self control, even when we eat.
C. Our Nation has a problem with obesity. From 2002- Over 7 million people in the U.S. are classified as severely Obese, 13 million are Obese, and 80 million are over-weight. That is over 1/3rd of our population. Do we realize that the calorie intake on average for all of the countries in the world (excluding the U.S.) is about 436 calories per day! The average American eats 3,576 calories per day!
2. In drinking
A. Proverbs 23:29-35
1. I do not partake of alcoholic beverages. I understand that there are other Christians who do but I would not encourage it. I believe alcohol can ruin one’s witness for Christ and cause someone weaker to stumble.
2. I cannot say one is sinning by drinking alcohol, but the Bible does speak plainly concerning drunkenness. It seems logical to me that if the first drop is never sipped then drunkenness will not be a concern.
3. Illegal drugs also fit in this category. Also, prescription drugs are a growing problem for Americans.
5. Many people in today’s culture are looking for freedom in the wrong places. Plug for Celebrate Recovery.
B. Proverbs 23:20-21 as it applies to drinking and drugs.
3. In dealing with members of the opposite sex
A. Proverbs 23:26-28
1. Men need to teach limits and boundaries on sexual issues.
2. Pornography.
3. Gawking at women when they pass by. Giving them sexual rating, etc.
4. Think about the witness a man can be if he tries to get this right in his life and then teaches this to his children.
B. Proverbs 23:25
1. Men need to model how to love a woman in the covenant of marriage. (Prov 5:18 NIV) may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.
2. Men need to respect their wives. Proverbs 23:22
C. James Dobson and Gary Bauer in book Children at Risk – “Fathers must be there to tame adolescent boys, to give a young son a sense of what it means to be a man, and to explain why honor and loyalty and fidelity are important. For daughters, fathers are a source of love and comfort that can help her avoid surrendering her virtue in a fruitless search for love through premarital sex.”
4. In discipline
Proverbs 23:13-14
Men need to discipline their children. Many times children do not honor a woman’s discipline, but they fear a father’s punishment. Not that I am advocating abuse but the buck should stop with the father and he needs to set the tone when it comes to discipline.
5. In providing for a family and making money
Proverbs 23:4-5
A. Men need to teach their children about hard work. It is impossible for most people to become rich. Get rich quick schemes are too good to be true.
B. We need to make money to provide for ourselves and families but don’t make money the goal in life. J. Vernon McGee- When I preached at a church in the downtown financial district of Los Angeles, I found that men, even including some Christian men, were far more zealous in coming down early on a Monday morning to watch the stock market open that they were on Sunday morning to attend church service. I met such a man rushing to the stock market display at the brokerage on a Monday morning. He met me, greeted me, and told me what he was going to do. I mentioned to him that we had been missing him at church. He said, “Well, you know, I haven’t been feeling very well.” That is interesting. He didn’t feel well enough to come to church, but he was well enough to worship his god very early on a Monday morning.
B. The United States dollar has an eagle on it. The eagle will fly away often. One man said: "That money talks, I’ll not deny, I heard it once, it said, ’Good-bye.’"
B. Men need to teach their children about how to handle money. Need to teach them how to get money: Through hard work, honesty and integrity, and by depending on God. Need to teach them how to keep money: By not borrowing, by planning ahead (budget), and saving for the future. Need to teach them how to use money: by giving to God first, by giving to meet the needs of others (like family and the less fortunate).
6. In ethics and morals
Proverbs 23:10-11
A. Men need to teach their children about moral values that are always right.
B. Men need to teach their children that God will always look out for the less fortunate so we better treat everyone with dignity and respect.
C. (Luke 6:31 NIV) Do to others as you would have them do to you.
7. In hospitality
Proverbs 23:6-8
A. Men are not that good at the details of hospitality but they can be teachers about hospitality. Men need to teach their children about how to share and what to share.
B. Men need to teach their children about opening up their home and letting their friends come to their house. Some men unfortunately feel like their house is off limits.
8. In the truth
Proverbs 23:23
A. Jesus is the truth. (John 14:6 NIV) Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.
B. We must buy the truth. (Mat 13:45 NIV) "Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant looking for fine pearls. (Mat 13:46 NIV) When he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it.
C. Do not sell it.
D. (Eph 6:4 NIV) Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. Main ways fathers exasperate their children is to say, “Do as I say and not as I do.”
