Concordia Lutheran Church
Lent 5, Wednesday, March 24, 2010
By His Stripes: Healing Wounded Relationships
Forgiveness and Absolution
† IHS †
May you realize the incredible grace of God our Father, paid for by Christ’s suffering and death, convince you that He has cleansed you from all sin and unrighteousness. And trusting in His word and deed, may you rejoice in His love and peace!
The Excuses
As we have dealt with the negative behaviors that weaken and even destroy relationships, we have mentioned tonight’s theme as the pathway towards healing. For most of us, the journey seems difficult, at least to begin to undertake.
It requires us to do something that to be honest, many of us fear. It means we have to responsibly acknowledge that we can sin against others, and that we have been sinned against.
Perhaps its because we live in a society that seems fascinated with get what is ours, or defending that which others would try to take from us. Dr. Sonnenberg, in the materials notes that we are a state where for every 120 people there is one practicing lawyer.
Great examples of avoiding responsibility are seen in the various excuses people give, to show that they are not at fault in car accidents. Here are a few.
"The telephone pole was approaching fast. I was attempting to swerve out of its path when it struck my front end."
"The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him."
"An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my vehicle, and vanished."
"I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way."
"Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I haven't got."
"I did not think the train ran on those lines anymore."
"I had been learning to drive with power steering. I turned the wheel to what I thought was enough and found myself in a different direction going the opposite way."
Undoubtedly this one was his favorite.
"I was on the way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident."
Not sure I want to find out what that one meant.
Theses are funny stories, sure, but how many times, trying to avoid responsibility, have we said or written similar things? We avoid saying it’s our fault, or we try to minimize the damage by including words like “because of”, or “but, if they,”. Likewise, we minimalize the pain others cause us, when we say, “Oh, it’s nothing,” or “Well I can take it”, and somehow attempt to ignore the pain and the division.
The Need
Now while most of us wouldn’t mind not being found at fault for an accident or perhaps a speeding ticket, most people bear very heavy burdens that they were not meant to bear. How much stress, how much illness is caused by our pasts? Unable to face the challenges of dealing with things on our own, we repress the pain.
It doesn’t matter if the pain is caused by someone else, or whether it is our own guilt and shame. It weighs down on us.
Recently, I asked a bunch of pople which is harder – to forgive and give up the right to revenge and justice, or to accept forgiveness and give up dwelling in guilt and shame. The answer of course is yes – they are opposite sides of the same coin, and far too often we would rather repress the sins for years and decades.
Dr. Sonnenberg cites an interesting program, put on in a non-denominational church in the Midwest.
Not too long ago, LifeChurch, an evangelical network with nine locations and based in Edmond, Oklahoma, set up mysecret.tv as a forum for people to confess anonymously on the Internet. Some of the confessions have included:
Someone who was molested years ago by her baby-sitter and is guilt ridden by the fact that she failed to protect her younger siblings from the same abuse.
An unhappy father, businessman and churchgoer confessed he is having a sexual relationship with another man in his church.
A young woman confessed shooting an abusive boyfriend when she was high on methamphetamines.
The LifeChurch founder, the Rev. Craig Groeschel, said that after 16 years in the ministry he knew that the smiles and eager handshakes that greeted him each week often masked a lot of pain. But the accounts of anguish and guilt that have poured into mysecret.tv have stunned him, Rev. Groeschel said, and affirmed his belief in the need for confession.
Interesting, a non-denominational church determining what that we need to confess our sins. The apostle James spoke of it long ago.
16 Make this your common practice: Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you can live together whole and healed. The prayer of a person living right with God is something powerful to be reckoned with. James 5:16 (MSG)
And the apostle John said it this way,
9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
1 John 1:9 (ESV)
Ego Te’ Absolvo
One of the differences in the way we as Lutherans talk about confession, whether public or private, is to separate it from the phrase it belongs within. Confession and Absolution.
Prior to bringing the concept, the sacrament of Absolution into the English or German Language, the pastor said it this way. Ego Te Absolvo.
Not forgive, absolve. I understand it comes from the passage from 1 John – we are absolved, cleansed, completely cleared of all sin and unrighteousness. Our sins aren’t just forgiven, like when we non-chalantly tell someone else they are forgiven. They are absolved, scrubbed away, completely removed. Both our sins, and the unrighteous things of others that stain our lives.
That is what Joseph’s brothers saw, as they wept in their reunion. That’s the cleansing which happened to the thief on the cross. Complete. Irrevocable, the incredible cleansing love of Christ, which paid all the cost, on the cross of Christ.
When I pronounce forgiveness in the service I say, In the stead, and by the command of Christ. And there is never a time where like the present – to hear those words. I absolve you, of all sin and unrighteousness. God has healed you.
And so let us consider those times, and hear of God’s mercy and love.
Of all the sin and unrighteousness when you were in a discussion that escalated out of control – the Lord is merciful and † you are absolved and cleansed.
Of all the times when you dismissed and invalidated another person, or when they invalidated you. Christ has had mercy, and you are cleansed of it all †
When people misinterpreted your intentions and put the worst construction on them, and when there were times were you negatively interpreted their actions and thoughts. The Lord is merciful in this as well, and you are cleansed and absolved.†
When you withdrew, rather than deal with what was bothering you, or when others withdrew from you, when you desperately needed closure to the pain. Christ has had mercy, and you are cleansed. †
If there is any other sin, whether that which you need to take responsibility for, or that which has been committed against you…spend a little time talking to God about it now….
Ego te Absolvo. †
You are absolved, and now, completely cleansed of all sin and unrighteousness, you are free to live in the peace of God our Father, and the Lord Jesus Christ.
AMEN!
