The Believer’s Relationship To Others
Romans 13:7-10
* Life is built on relationships. It has been long said, “It’s not what you know, but who you know.” The part of this equation which we miss is that our relationships have a huge impact on the person we are & that we become.
* As we began the study of Chapter 13 (last week) we discovered the Believer’s Biblical relationship to the government. In verse 7, Paul speaks of paying all of our debts and then transitions to our relationship to others. In this way He ties his personal teachings to the teachings of Jesus and both center our relationship in this thing called “love.” So let’s think about love.
1. The Debt of Love – Debt is a common word for us today. This nation has a staggering load. Have you ever wondered why? While the answer may be complicated on a systemic level but on a simplistic level the government of the USA only REFLECTS the values of the citizens who control it. Can we expect a government of, by, and for the people; a government who is elected by the people as a representative of the people to NOT be ALIKE the people? I think not. So we have a country who very well introduced to this thing called debt. (Snoopy cartoon—letter to IRS, “I’m writing to cancel my subscription, please take my name off your mailing list.” Bills are like weeds, they keep coming back. One overextended man handled the stress this way. He received a call from a creditor and said, “Here is what I do. Every month I put all my bills in a hat and pull out 5 of them. Those are the ones which I pay. You call me again, and you won’t get in the hat.”)
* Many people will verse 8 and teach that, as a matter of economics, we should NEVER go into debt for any reason. While it is likely true that God’s best for us would be to not incur any debt, it is equally true that to take this one passage and make it all about money is to take away from the full meaning of this verse. I’ll offer to you that one reason it is better not to be in debt is this; when you owe a person money, every time you see them that debt is the first thing which comes to your mind. At that point, the things of God (I.E. whether they are saved or not, walking with God or not, etc) are pretty much forgotten because, for the person of integrity, they think of that debt.
* The real message of this passage is to be a person who owes LOVE to every person. Think about it like this; the same way you are consumed with the financial debt you owe another is the way you should be consumed with love for another.
* Some will say, “I don’t owe anyone a debt of love. What have they done to deserve my love?” Our debt comes from the debt established by Jesus’ death on the cross. We have sung about this for years, “But drops of grief can never repay the debt of love I owe.
* Here Lord, I give myself away, it’s all that I can do.” I submit that the debt we owe is to love, not an ‘if’ kind of love or a ‘because of’ kind of love, but an ‘INSPITE OF’ type of love. The reason is that God loved us. He loved us when we were unlovely and unlovable! In fact, in His love Jesus paid our sin debt when we were flat broke. Think about that. There is an old song which says, “He paid a debt He did not owe, I owed a debt I could not pay.” We had no love until He gave us love. Yet, He gave us such love that according to His own words, “the world will know us by our love.”
2. The Design of Love - The design of anything determines its strength, its endurance, and even its attractiveness. Love is no different. True love, ‘agape’ love, is designed by God to fulfill God’s law. In our text we see the summary of God’s law in this, “to love our neighbor as our self.” From this statement it would seem that, all too well, Paul understands the 21st century “all about me” culture. But to understand the depth of what Paul is saying, let’s see if we can construct a model of this type of love.
* The foundation of this design is not even mentioned in this scripture because Paul senses that His readers already understand the truth. The foundation of love is to LOVE GOD and to have EXPERIENCED GOD’S love. In Matthew 22 a teacher asked Jesus for the greatest commandment and without hesitation our Lord responded, “Love the Lord God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength.” I submit that this kind of love for God is a “life-changing” kind of love. This past Wednesday my family drove to be with our son to celebrate engagement to his girlfriend. It was a great event. In about 15 months, because of their love for each other (and more) they plan to marry. When they marry, their life will never be the same. Now, because of their love, they will defer to each other. Because of their love, they will seek to make the other happy. When you totally and completely love another person, it changes your thought processes, your lifestyle, your attitudes, and much more. It is the same with love for God. Our love for Him changes our lives. Conversely, we cannot offer this type of love if we don’t know God. 1 John 4:8 says, “The one who does not love, does not know God, because God is love.” The foundation of love is to love God. We cannot give what we don’t have any more than we can tell what we don’t know. Until we experience God’s love, we have trouble giving it.
* The next phase of this design, as Paul laid it out, is that we ‘love our neighbor as we love ourselves.” Jesus hardly took a breath when He followed part one of the great commandment with part two. He said, “Love the Lord God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. And love your neighbor as yourself.” The “loving your neighbor” concept originally comes from the Law of Holiness given to the Children of Israel in Leviticus 19 as God was setting for the laws for living.
* This principle has several interesting concepts to consider. Let’s begin with the “As Yourself” part. It was seem apparent that one of two things are true; a) God knows we are wired in such a way as to love ourselves without reservation and/or without respect to whether it is right or wrong, or b) God has placed within us the ability to have a “healthy self-love” which gives us a basis for loving other people. However, the deeper truth might well be that both of these concepts are true. It doesn’t take a genius to look around and recognize that we certainly have the ability to make #1 number one!! We all have that temptation to protect, build up, and defend self at all cost. Honestly, pop-psychology focusing on “self-image” has done much to propagate this attitude. However, God has given to us the ability to possess a confident and accurate self-image. John writes (1 John 3:21) “If our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God.” Think about having a confident self image when standing before the creator of the heavens and earth. When we possess this confidence in the presence of deity, we also grasp the reality of the source of our strength. With this insight, we love ourselves in a healthy manner absent pride and arrogance which makes us prepared (emotionally & spiritual) to love our neighbor.
* From the perspective of our Lord to Love our neighbor is just as an interesting concept as loving our self. In fact, it was so interesting that in Dr. Luke’s gospel some of those who heard Jesus lay forth this teaching asked, “Who exactly is my neighbor?” Most of us think we know who our neighbor are as well as who are our neighbors. In our thinking, it is the people next door, those like us, and those whom we like. Yet in Jesus’ response, He tore down all those concepts which we carry and expanded our neighbors to EVERYONE. Jesus pointed out that some of the very people we THINK are neighborly (I.E. the priest and Levite) would not pass the test of loving their neighbors while the one thought of a “trash” (I.E. the Samaritan) turned out to be the godly neighbor. To love our neighbors like Christ desires is to go the extra step like Christ says. The Samaritan was inconvenienced, spent money that he had no idea he would ever get it back, and put himself on the line for a stranger.
* We are now in a similar project here. This past week, our Women’s ministry have been inconvenience, spent money, and even put themselves “out” for children all across our school system. This is what it means to be “Jesus in the world” & it is in this way that we demonstrate a godly love for those we don’t know. Becoming less concerned about “what’s in it for me” is the first step in fulfilling God law and His desire to be people of love to this world. To do this we must be IN LOVE with God and willing to SHOW LOVE to all. This is God’s design.
* To completely love God means that we have turned our lives over to Him, received His offer of salvation through Jesus, and are now living like a member of His family. We have become an heir and joint-heir of the Kingdom and our Father is Royalty.
3. The Description of Love – How exactly does this “love” play out? Let’s begin in verse 10, “Love does no wrong to a neighbor.” Hopefully, from the words of Jesus we understand that everyone is our neighbor. The word wrong in the KJV is ill which comes from the Greek word which means, “Worthless, bad, evil, harm, wicked, injurious” and the like. So for a good description let’s put all of our thoughts together and see what comes out.
* If we could and would love each other in this way, the first part of verse 9 would become 2nd nature. Because of love (and a good conscious) no one would commit adultery. They would love their spouses, friends, family, and even their partner in sin too much to commit such an egregious act. If we loved each other so much that we didn’t commit adultery (or ever the act of lust) then divorces would cease and homes would be restored. We also wouldn’t covet because we’d be glad for the blessings others received and because of our love and respect for them stealing would not happen. And murder? Who would murder someone that they truly loved in this manner? No one.
* In God’s system of society, love would be the ruling principle. Understand this love is not the emotion, affectionate, and sensual feelings which we equate with love in the 21st century, but rather a love which transcends feelings and emotions. It is a love which brings joy, leads to respect, and ushers in peace.
> In 1967, the four young men from Liverpool, England, who took the music world by storm, recorded a song entitled, “All You Need Is Love.” While the message of the song is questionable, the title of the song is exactly right. All we need is LOVE “IF” it’s God’s love. Once we know His love, then our relationships truly change. Our lives become fruit trees with multiple fruit bearing possibilities. The first fruit to produce is love, God’s love.
> In Chuck Colson’s book “Kingdom in Conflict” he tells about God’s love and that one person can make a difference. In December 1983, 11-year-old Trevor Ferrell saw a television news report on Philadelphia’s inner-city homeless. The young boy couldn’t believe people actually lived on the streets. When he questioned his parents, Frank and Janet reluctantly agreed to broaden their son’s sheltered horizons - and their own. They left their home in an exclusive suburb and drove downtown. One block past city hall, they spotted an emaciated figure crumpled on a sidewalk grate. While his parents watched a bit apprehensively, Trevor got out of the car and approached the man. "Sir," he said, "here’s a blanket for you." The man stared up at Trevor at first. Then, he softly said, "Thank you, God bless you."
> That encounter altered the Ferrells’ lives forever. Night after night they drove downtown, trying in small ways to help the street people. They emptied their home of extra blankets, clothing, and dozens of peanut-butter sandwiches. When others learned what they were doing, someone donated a van and volunteers charted nightly food distribution routes. To the Ferrells’ surprise, "Trevor’s Campaign" had begun.
> Young Trevor found himself explaining what they were doing to local media, then to the nation. Pat Robertson, Merv Griffin, Mother Teresa, Ronald Reagan - all wanted to meet the small boy with the big mission. He told them simply, "It’s Jesus inside of me that makes me want to do this."
