The first mention of a burial in the Bible is found in Genesis 23.
It was the burial of Sarah. Remember Sarah?
Here’s what we read in Genesis 17:15-16, God also said to Abraham, "As for Sarai your wife, you are no longer to call her Sarai; her name will be Sarah. I will bless her and will surely give you a son by her. I will bless her so that she will be the mother of nations; kings of peoples will come from her."
In 1 Peter 3:1-6 we read, Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.
Abraham was blessed to have Sarah as a wife!
Abraham loved Sarah! Sarah died before Abraham.
How do you deal with the death of a loved one?
Let us learn from God as we read the story of how Abraham dealt with Sarah’s death. Let us read Genesis 23….
Sarah lived 127 years. Why did Abraham mourn and weep for Sarah??
1. Abraham loved Sarah; and,
2. There was the sadness of the physical separation.
Do you know how long Abraham and Sarah were married before she died??
For over 62 years (maybe even over 100 years), Abraham and Sarah stayed together as husband and wife. Abraham loved Sarah because, in spite of the ups and downs in their marriage, they learned and grew together as a couple. How did Abraham and Sarah mature and persevered in their relationship? What have we learned from previous chapters in Genesis?
Were Abraham and Sarah perfect??
The first thing to realize to grow a relationship is this;
1. Your partner will make mistakes!
Abraham and Sarah accepted each other’s shortcomings as they matured in their marriage.
But do you really think Abraham and Sarah were able to work on their marriage on their own?
Abraham could have left Sarah and went with Hagar and Ishmael, whom Abraham loved! Remember how Sarah was a nag during that time?
Of course none of our wives here would ever do that!
Now guys, on the other hand, Sarah was beautiful and could have lived the good life with the Kings!
For selfish reasons, Abraham asked her to lie and say she was his sister! Of course, no husband here would do something like that today, right? But why are some noses getting longer?
Here’s the point, Abraham and Sarah would have been total failures without the intervention of God and their obedience to God.
The second thing to realize to grow a relationship is this;
2. Allow God to direct your relationship.
And of course, as we read from 1 Peter 3, the third thing to realize to grow a relationship is this:
3. Be responsible to your personal calling from God.
Sarah was called by God to be submissive to her husband. And we read in 1 Peter 3:7-10, Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers. Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.
Now, many husbands love this passage because they would cite that women are “weaker partners”. Again, here’s where many of us mess up; we have a tendency to look down on others and neglect our specific personal responsibilities!
Guys, the way to read this passage is to circle those things that we are to be responsible for: be considerate, treat wives with respect, be sympathetic, be compassionate and humble, don’t repay evil or insults with evil and insults but with blessings!
How are we doing with these things?
Abraham, Sarah, and all Christians are called by God to love one another, especially husband and wife.
Now, let us remember what we had learned from Genesis 22. Don’t be too hard on yourself. God does not expect people to be perfect overnight; but God expects them to work towards it. It does not happen overnight, but God is at work to make you become a hero. The question is, will we allow Him to mold us?
There will be mourning and weeping when a loved one dies. Sadness also comes when there is physical separation from someone who was part of your life. Physical death of a person brings sadness because:
1. it reminds us of the penalty for sinning against God; we read in Genesis 2:16-17, And the LORD God commanded the man, "You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it you will surely die." The first part of Romans 6:23 tells us, For the wages of sin is death! All of us have sinned and all of us will die and face eternal judgment! Sin and death brings sadness!
And there is sadness when someone dies because,
2. we are relational beings - Gen 2:18 tells us,
The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone….."
And God tells us in Rom 12:4-6,
Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others.
When a person dies, those close to that person will be missing that person. And so, Abraham mourned and wept over Sarah.
But did Abraham linger in his sorrow?
It is proper to mourn when a loved one dies but there are responsibilities which must not be neglected. Abraham made sure that Sarah had a proper and respectful burial.
Now, why do you think Abraham was adamant about getting a burial site in the land of the Hittites? Why not take Sarah’s body back to where she grew up??
First of all, Abraham likely did not have the time to go anywhere else; Sarah’s body needed to be buried.
Secondly, the Hittites offered their tomb sites, but Abraham asked for a cave. Abraham desired a good and safe site for Sarah’s burial.
And yes, I wonder if Abraham knew what he was doing in relation to God’s promise of the land?
It is hard to say whether Abraham was in tuned with God regarding the land at that time, after all, he just lost a wife.
Whether Abraham was thinking of God’s promises or not, purchasing a land in Canaan assured ownership of the land! The land was deeded to Abraham and ensured the land to Abraham and Sarah’s descendants. We will read more about this in later chapters of Genesis. But in Genesis 49:31-32 Jacob said, “There Abraham and his wife Sarah were buried, there Isaac and his wife Rebekah were buried, and there I buried Leah. The field and the cave in it were bought from the Hittites."
Abraham made sure that Sarah had a proper and respectful burial. But we can know this for sure: God was in control of the situation. You see, God has a way of working things out to line up with His plan.
We need to note here that everything eventually lines up with God’s plans and not man’s. In other words, depending on God’s plan, the final results may be blessings or they may be judgments! There will be times in our lives that we will be unsure of; God will help us with those. But, if we knowingly choose to go against God, there will be consequences!
Let me conclude by summarizing the applications of these biblical principles to our lives today.
1. Learn to love one another, especially your spouse! Learn from Abraham and Sarah: accept the fact that people including the one you thought would be perfect (i.e. your spouse, will make mistakes); depend on the Triune God (the Father, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit); also, know and be responsible to your “calling” from God.
Husbands, don’t complain about what your wife is doing, do what you personally are called to do by God!
Wives, stop complaining about your husband, do what you personally have to do.
2. There should be sadness when one dies, but we must move forward with the life God has given to us. Again, learn from Abraham. Like Abraham, we must continue to believe in God no matter how we are hurting!
And we must not neglect the responsibilities God has given us. What did the Hittites say about Abraham?
Look again at v6 of Genesis 23…..
Abraham was a good witness for God! Christians are called to be good witnesses for Jesus Christ in good times and in sad. How are you doing?
God tells us in Romans 8:28, And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
God has a way of working things out to line up with His plan. Again let us note, everything will eventually line up to God’s plans not man’s!
God’s plan is to love everyone! We can know that God loves us because God gave us Jesus Christ to die for our sins. The question is, do we truly believe in Jesus Christ and do we love God back?
Understanding Communion and participating in it, is a testimony to your belief and love for God. Let us celebrate together God’s commitment to us and our commitment to Him through Communion.
Please, if you are not a believer of Christ, no not participate in communion. There is judgment on those who mock God. But please pray about your understanding of Jesus Christ who is the only Savior for every human being. Receive Christ in your heart today and learn how to deal with grief, how to truly love, and understand life!
