Please Note: To the degree I may positively contribute at all is a reflection of the degree to which I have been open to and willing to learn from the Holy Spirit, in God’s Word and through other servants of His. All of my messages are directly or indirectly, consciously or subconsciously influenced by others. I have no problem referring to or quoting others who have expressed something better than I ever can and do my best to give credit in every instance possible. However, per general rules of publishing, I do not notate quotes or illustrations that are common knowledge and widely available.
OVERCOMING THE FOUR “F”s: FAILURE
INTRODUCTION:
Sometimes, things don’t go or end up the way we want or hope. We all have failed – sometimes even while others have succeeded. We aren’t able to complete a task or challenge, we lose a game, fail a test, let somebody down, fail in a relationship – or marriage, do something that is wrong, or even turn our backs on Jesus..
And, sometimes, we feel like a failure because of something that happens outside of our control. It could be losing your job because of ’downsizing’, your parents (or children) fighting or getting divorced, the weather ruins your crops or your carefully laid out plans, or perhaps having something or someone we really counted on suddenly taken away for one reason or another.
Whatever it is, it can feel like life hit in the chin, you’re just a dunce, or no matter how many times you try you can’t even hit the target right in front of you.
The question I would like us to consider this morning is: How can and should we face failure – especially our own? What do we do when it seems like we can’t do anything right? How do we respond to life’s disappointments?
There are many models that we could follow. First, consider some of the most common ones, which are also the ones we should not follow:
The Presidential Model - Cover it up and conveniently forget.
The Jim & Tammy Baker Model – Refuse to take the blame. Shed a lot of crocodile tears. Threaten to sue.
The Celebrity Model – Deny. Act indignant. Throw some money around. Take advantage of the free publicity.
The Enron Model – ’Cook’ the books to make your colossal failure look like a tremendous success. Then destroy all evidence to the contrary and live it up extravagantly.
The Judas Iscariot Model – Give up. Despair. Hang yourself. Be replaced. Set your failure in permanent ink for all history.
Fortunately, we do NOT have to follow these models. We are blessed because God and His Word tell us a lot about facing failure. In fact, the people in the Bible we look up to all the time were pros at failing! Adam & Eve only had one simple rule to keep and they couldn’t even do that! Abraham lied about his wife in Egypt and said she was just his sister. Esau sold his birthright. Joseph’s brothers tried to kill him and then sold him into slavery. David loved someone else’s wife and then had her husband killed. Solomon received divine wisdom and then willfully chose to live like a fool. Elijah allowed himself to get so depressed that after defeating thousands, he ran away from a single woman and begged God to take his life. Jonah first rejected God and His plan. How many times did the 12 disciples fail to understand Jesus? To trust Him? On the eve before His arrest, they couldn’t even stay awake for Him! And what about John’s three denials?
The Good News of Great Joy is that we have a Lord who loves us in spite of our failures. That doesn’t mean He always loves our failures or that we won’t sometimes have consequences because of them, but He will still love us and be there to help us overcome even the worst of failures!
We’re going to try something different today. Whenever a Scripture verse drops on the screen, I’m going to ask you to read it together with me. Let’s try it now with the first one we need to remember this morning. Hebrews 13:5b
PRAYER
OUR GREAT GOD OF COMFORT (parts based on a sermon given by Dr. Jerry Falwell):
It is at times of failure and disappointment that we most need to be comforted, isn’t it? I want to make sure that you learn and never forget that if you know Jesus as your Lord and Savior, He will always be with you and He will always comfort you – no matter what is happening!!!
That doesn’t mean that He won’t prevent you from ever failing. Those things are all part of what it means to live and learn in a sinful world. But He WILL always be with you during those times to comfort you, guide you, teach you and make you stronger and more godly because of your experiences. The world convinces us that failure is the ’unpardonable sin.’ But, God Almighty desires to use our failures to shape who we are and demonstrate His glory. Will you let Him?
2 Corinthians 1:3-5. Jesus never failed, but He did suffer and face disappointment when He lived on the earth as a man. He endured all of that for us in order that we may be saved from our sins and so that we in turn could comfort others because we too have overcome horrible times. And don’t forget, His greatest accomplishment on this Earth that, in the eyes of the word, was considered a colossal failure: the Cross!
Two Championship Quotes:
1. “You don’t determine a man or woman’s greatness by wealth or success as the world does, but rather by what it takes to discourage him or her.” - Dr. Jerry Falwell
A true success in life is someone who has such great faith in Jesus that he or she will not easily become or stay discouraged.
Why? Because they know that Jesus is still in control, that He loves them and that He will never leave them or forget them.
2. “I have never known God to use a discouraged person.” - D.L. Moody
God only uses people of faith. A discouraged person is a person who has momentarily stopped trusting God. But if you keep trusting Him, no matter what, He will use you to achieve great victories!
2 Undeniable Facts of Life:
1. Life is NOT Fair, Get Over It!
God IS fair, but life is not.
Rejection is something that we ALL must face in our lives.
+ Choose to reject the rejection!
2. You Will Lose More than You Will Win
There will be more times in life when you are disappointed or encounter the unexpected that you don’t want, then there will be times when you feel you’ve had a great victory.
That’s OK, it’s normal.
Consider an Olympic Gold Medalist. Most people who win an Olympic gold only win it once. That means they’ve also lost a lot of times and fallen short. But if you asked them, do you think they’d tell you it was worth it for that one win? Of course!
The losses are necessary in order to learn and grow enough to get the wins and the wins are always worth enduring all the losses for!
FAILURE LIST: Often, when things don’t go the way we thought they would we can all feel like failures, huh? Do you know that someone once said that the only real failure is the person who gives up on himself? Or, as I like to say, the only failure is the failure to learn. Everything is simply an experience to learn, grow and become smarter and stronger!
Einstein, considered by many the smartest man of the last century, didn’t begin to speak until he was 4 years old.
Isaac Newton, scientist and discoverer of gravity, did very poorly in grade school and was considered by his teachers to have an “unpromising” future.
Beethoven, one of history’s greatest musical composers, was once told by his music teacher that, “as a composer, he is hopeless.”
Thomas Edison was once told by his teacher that he was too stupid to learn anything. He was told that when he grows up, he should find a job where he can get by on his pleasant personality and won’t need much smarts. When Edison began inventing he experienced one failure after another. Everybody laughed and made fun of him – except his mother who always believed in him. Edison kept trying and believing and eventually had more successful and life-altering inventions than anyone in history.
F.W. Woolworth got a job in a dry goods store when he was 21, but his employer would not permit him to wait on customers because he “didn’t have enough sense to close a sale.” Woolworth went on to start one of the first and biggest chains of department stores.
Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team. So was Boston Celtics Hall of Famer Bob Cousy.
Walt Disney was once fired by his newspaper editor because he “lacked imagination and had no good ideas.”
Winston Churchill had to repeat the sixth grade because he did not complete the tests that were required for promotion. He went on to become Prime Minister of England, one of the men most responsible for stopping Adolf Hitler and one of the greatest statesmen of the 20th Century.
Babe Ruth struck out a major league record 1,300 times. Yet, he also set a record for home runs and is considered the greatest baseball player ever!
8 Steps to Successfully Face Your Failures:
1.Recognize that the real problem is a failure to trust Jesus. Romans 8:28
We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God: those who are called according to His purpose.
2.Look for the lesson God is teaching you through this time. Psalm 119:71
It was good for me to be afflicted so that I could learn Your statutes.
3.Accurately assess your problems – rarely are they ever as bad as they seem.
Open a jigsaw puzzle and show one piece. Hand it to someone and ask him or her to look at it and tell you what the piece shows. (most likely, they won’t be able to. If they can, choose another piece). Now, let him or her look at the picture and see if now they can tell you what the piece is (“Oh, that’s part of the purple flower” or “That’s part of the rock” or “That a corner of Mickey’s ear.”).
Seeing the big picture always gives us perspective. When we can see the big picture, it helps the little pieces make sense. Experiencing life is the same way. If we can see the big picture around our troubles they’ll make a lot more sense.
But, sometimes, we aren’t able to see that big picture. We can only see the little piece of life that we are living with. It is then that we need to remember that God sees everything from beginning to end. He sees all the parts we can’t see, He knows all the things we can’t know, and He understands all the things that make no sense to us. Even more, He knows what all the kings horses and all the kings men don’t - how to put all the pieces together again!
1 Corinthians 13:12-13
For now we see indistinctly, as in a mirror, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I will know fully, as I am fully known.
Now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love.
4.Forget what you can not understand. Don’t look back, just move on.
When Australia was a new nation, its leaders established a national crest. Two animals stood one on each side of the crest – the kangaroo and the emu. These two animals share a unique characteristic – while kangaroos and emus turn their heads to glance backward in order to get their bearing, they always move forward. Though each animal can reach forward speeds of 30 mph, neither is able to walk backwards. The founders of Australia wanted their country represented by what moved forward, never backward.
That is just what Jesus wants us to do. Look back just long enough to recognize and learn from our mistakes, but always keep moving forward! Philippians 3:13.
5.Laugh at yourself whenever possible. Relax.
6.Forgive everyone, including yourself.
Gary J. Oliver writes: “Failure and sin are part of being human... Yes, God abhors sin, but He can use what He hates to drive us to the Cross, where we find forgiveness, a renewed perspective, and grace to move forward.” 1 John 2:1-2
My little children, I am writing you these things so that you may not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father – Jesus Christ the righteous One. He Himself is the propitiation of our sins, and not only for ours, but also for those of the whole world.
7.Make new and fair expectations.
8.Get up and keep on – even if it means risking failure again and again. Failures are our stepping stones to later success. The only failure you can never overcome in Christ, is your own failure to get back up and keep on for Him! Pr. 24:16.
Though a righteous man falls seven times, he will get up, but the wicked will stumble into ruin.
MODELS TO LEARN FROM
Earlier, we looked at some of the world’s models for addressing failure. In light of what we have learned from Scripture, let us now quickly review the positive examples of overcoming failure in the Scriptures (again, credit to John Maxwell):
Abraham & Sarah: Live with your mistake and try, try again.
Jacob: Face up to your failure with an attitude of humility and servanthood. Wrestle with God until He blesses you. Send your enemy a gift. Be ready to take your lumps.
Joseph: Don’t compromise with sin. Don’t expect justice. Do what you can where you are – even in jail. And get our as soon as you can.
Moses: Withdraw, get away from trouble, temptation and stress. Wait there and prepare for the day God says, “Go back and fade ’em again – this time with Me by your side.”
King David: Face up to your failure. Repent of your sin. Take your punishment. Receive forgiveness. Get up and go on.
Simon Peter: Shed a lot of tears. Demote yourself and go fishing for a while. When you hear His voice again, feed God’s sheep.
JESUS: Rise again . . . and prove them wrong!!!
CONCLUSION:
Consider the birth of a giraffe. The first thing to emerge from the mommy is the baby giraffe’s front hooves and head. A few minutes later the plucky newborn is hurled forth, falls 10 feet and lands on its back! Within seconds, he rolls to an upright position with his legs tucked under his body. From this position he considers the world for the first time.
The mother giraffe lowers her head long enough to take a quick look. Then she positions herself directly over her calf. She waits for about a minute, and then she does the most unreasonable thing! She swings her long, inward-bending leg outward and actually kicks her baby hard enough to send it sprawling head over heels!
When it doesn’t get up, the violent process is repeated over and over again. The struggle to rise is momentous. The baby calf grows tired, the mother kicks it again to stimulate its efforts . . . Finally, the calf stands for the first time on its wobbly legs.
Then the mother giraffe does the most remarkable thing. She kicks it off its feet again! Why? Because, she wants it to remember how it got up. In the wild, baby giraffes must be able to get up as quickly as possible to stay with the herd, where there is safety. Lions, hyenas, leopards, and wild hunting dogs all enjoy young giraffes for dinner. And they’d get it too, if the mother didn’t teach her calf to get up quickly and get away!
I know that sometimes my life can seem like that too! There have been many times (and will certainly be many more) when it seemed that I had just stood up after getting knocked down by a trial in my life only to be knocked down again. But, you know, I’ve grown to realize that whether or not God is the one who knocked me down, He is always there to help me to remember how to get back up; always urging me to walk with Him, in His shadow and under His tender-loving care.
Romans 5:1-5
PRAYER
