One of the biggest speed bumps to understanding God can be our encounters with pain and suffering. The hurts we experience may stem from abandonment or abuse, sorrow and loss, fears and failures, setbacks and confrontations, chronic illness and pain - the list is long. We all hurt for a variety of reasons.
Sometimes God’s hand of comfort and His compassion toward us in our pain and sorrow is so wonderful we can’t describe it. He appears on the scene of our calamity with assistance and provision and we stand in awe of His presence.
At other times, however, He seems distant and disinterested, like He’s moved and hasn’t left a forwarding address. He has all the power and provision necessary to alleviate our misery but He doesn’t seem to be lifting a finger to come to our rescue.
It’s at times like that when our faith is tested. Our cries for help seem to go unanswered; our thirst for answers unquenched.
If we’re not careful we can become fearful and disillusioned with God when we’re hurting.
I’m ashamed to say that I let that happen to me somewhat when I found out my mom had terminal cancer. I was 23 years old, Deb and I had been married only 3 years earlier, I had begun pastoring my first church, and we started having babies. The future seemed bright. Mom’s cancer was an anomaly.
The main problem was that it seemed so unfair from a human standpoint. Mom was a faithful follower of Christ. She had already seen the man she loved and married, our father, kill himself by abusing alcohol. She had already raised three sons, largely by herself. And now her life was to be cut short by the blight of runaway tumors invading her body.
I’ve got to be honest and tell you I was angry and frustrated and above all – I was really hurting. I was mainly hurting because I hated to witness her hurting. And I know plenty of you know those feelings all too well. I was not only her son, but she moved to the town where I was pastoring and I also became her pastor. That was hard. Trying to be a pastor to my dying mother while I was so young and inexperienced.
But the amazing thing is, I learned a lot about life and death during the two years between mom’s diagnosis and her departure for heaven. And most of it I learned from her!
She had peace with God throughout her suffering. She had a winning faith. Sure, she struggled greatly with the weight of her dilemma, but she didn’t turn her back on God. Instead she steadily kept on progressing in her faith.
And I told myself during those days - that’s what I wanted to learn to do. I wanted to learn to trust God and grow in my faith in Him even when faced with seemingly insurmountable odds.
It hasn’t always been easy and I haven’t always expressed the faith in God that I should have, but God is patient and longsuffering, and His Word shows us the way. I’ve searched for God’s hand of comfort and wisdom plenty of times in my journey of following Christ and sometimes I didn’t find Him right away. And I’m sure you can relate.
The classic biblical example of searching for God when you’re hurting is the story of Job. Job quickly lost his possessions, his health and his children in a succession of natural disasters.
And even though he knew God, he made this honest admission in his pain: (That’s one of the many reasons you’ve gotta love the Bible – it is so honest.) Job said this:
"I cannot find God anywhere -- in front or back of me, to my left or my right. God is always at work, though I never see him." Job 23:8,9 (CEV)
Have you ever had an experience like Job’s? Have you had those times when you searched for God and you couldn’t find Him? You knew He was at work but you had no immediate indication that He was doing anything to come to your rescue in the midst of your pain? Well if you have, take heart, we’re going to tackle this dilemma today.
We’re in the series "The God Questions" and this is one question about God with which man constantly wrestles.
As we established last week when we began this series together, we don’t have to be afraid to ask this or any other question about God because He has the answers. So today we’re going to hear God’s answer to "Where Is God When I Hurt?"
Does He really care? Is He mad at me? Am I not important to Him? Has He forgotten about me?
We’re going to see today that no one cares more about you than God does! In every area of your life He is vitally interested and He doesn’t turn His back on you when you’re going through pain. Instead, He is able to take your pain and suffering and turn it around into some very positive results!
Where is God when I’m hurting?
HE’S PROMPTING POSITIVE CHANGES IN ME.
We mentioned Job a few moments ago and its interesting to note that, not only was he perplexed about God’s whereabouts while he was suffering but he also expressed this confidence nonetheless; Job went on to say:
"But he knows what I am doing, and when he tests me, I will be pure as gold." Job 23:10 (CEV)
What tests have you been experiencing lately? Do you think nothing good can come of them? If you don’t think so, think again!
Testing has the potential to burn out your impurities. Difficulties are part of God’s refining process. My pain is often the fire that makes me better. And as I become a better person, I experience more of the joy and fulfillment in life that God created me to experience. I become more like God. (I’m not saying I become God. Some religions falsely teach that.) I’m saying I become more and more like Jesus. And as I become more and more like Jesus - God can bless me to a greater degree. (Come see how this works by joining us on Wednesdays for the conversation about "The Life God Blesses.")
Difficulties in my life have tremendous power to change me – for better or for worse. I get stronger or weaker – more positive or more negative - I become more hopeful or more cynical – depending on my response to my pain.
What am I supposed to do while going through the change process? The Bible gives me help.
I am told to...
"Wait for the Lord. Be strong. Let your heart be strong. Yes, wait for the Lord." Psalm 27:14 (NLV)
My biggest problem when I have problems is waiting! I don’t want to wait! I want to wrestle. I’m like Jacob in the Old Testament. I want to wrestle with God and I want to wrestle with my problems.
But that’s not what God wants! God wants me to approach my problems with faith in Him. He wants me to exercise confidence in His timing. God doesn’t always take away our problems because, quite frankly, His goal isn’t for us to live a problem-free life. His design is for us to become more like His Son Jesus.
How do I get to the place of “waiting on the Lord?” How am I supposed to act while I’m waiting? What can I do to facilitate the changes in me that God is using my suffering to accomplish?
a. I yield my will to do things God’s way.
"Abraham was willing to wait and God gave to him what He had promised." Hebrews 6:15 (NLV)
Circle that word “willing.” Ask yourself, “Am I willing to wait on God or do I want to do things my way?”
What’s this verse on Abraham about?
God promised Abraham that he would bless him and the future generations that followed him. Yet even into his golden years Abraham and his wife Sarah were childless.
Even though this Bible verse praises Abraham for being willing to wait, he did have a hiccup or two in his faith-walk. (Which is good news for the rest of us because we’re not going to be perfect expressing confidence in God either. It’s good to know God is patient with us while we learn.)
Abraham was willing to wait on God but he learned this through some trial and error.
First of all, he made the big mistake of lying about his wife Sarah, claiming she was his sister instead of his wife so a Gentile king wouldn’t kill him. God protected Abe and Sarah anyway and the patriarch learned he didn’t have to lie in order for God to protect Him.
And next he had a son by his wife’s servant in his effort to fulfill God’s promises. That too, Abraham learned, was a big mistake.
So he grew in his confidence in God even by his missteps. (Don’t stop yielding to God just because you’ve made some mistakes along the way! Allow your confidence in God to grow through your ups and downs.) Abraham learned that it was expressing confidence in God, not in his own ability, that brought about God’s blessings.
So here the Bible is referring to his overall posture of confidence in God’s promises.
Your faith may waver sometimes. You may have some faith hiccups. But is your will yielded to His will? Have you said, “God, here’s my pain, here’s my problems. I’m WILLING to do what you want me to do in this difficulty. I’m not going to mess up again by trying to solve things my way.”
b. I rest while I’m waiting.
"Be still and rest in the Lord; wait for Him and patiently lean yourself upon Him; fret not yourself because of him who prospers in his way, because of the man who brings wicked devices to pass." Psalm 37:7 (Amp)
My problem while I’m waiting on God is I see someone else who isn’t waiting and I’m afraid they’re getting ahead of me! So I get back in the game of taking care of things on my own and quit waiting on God.
That’s a shame. God intends for my spirit to be more at rest than it is. I’m so use to the competition of the culture around me that I don’t rest like I should. Our world is in a constant state of "unrest" and as a Christ follower I have the resources to rest. But I often fail to utilize them.
I read the other day that 93% of wireless phone subscribers take work-related mobile phones on vacation. (Church Leaders Intelligence Report, 2/14/07) In our culture we just don’t know how to rest. We even take our work on vacation…if we even take a vacation.
What a joy it is to experience resting in God - to give Him your worries and troubles and take a vacation from them. I don’t have to stress-out over my difficulties. I don’t have to lose sleep. I can sit back and rest in the confidence that God is at work on my problems.
So where is God when I’m hurting?
#1: He’s prompting positive changes in me for my own benefit. But I need to cooperate in the process by yielding my will and resting while I’m waiting.
Don’t worry if you’re not proficient at these things. Like Abraham – you’ll need to practice until you get it right.
And the Bible tells us where else God is when I’m hurting.
GOD IS RESCUING OTHERS THROUGH MY SUFFERING.
God uses people to help other people. And sometimes that necessitates God putting my life in the middle of someone else’s mess so I can help clean it up by my confidence in God.
Your human nature may rebel at this thought – but you are never more Christ-like than when you are willing to suffer for others in order that God may rescue them.
The classic biblical illustration of this is Joseph. His own brothers sold him as a slave and he had to spend many harsh and lonely years in a foreign land suffering pain and indignities at the hands of his taskmasters. Until one day God raised Joseph up to a position of great authority and power in Egypt. When his brothers came to Egypt years later Joseph’s words to them about the suffering they put him through are extremely insightful.
"You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people." Genesis 50:20 (NLT)
Joseph spent time in prison as a slave, he was beaten, framed for attempted rape, forgotten by those he served, and then…at just the right time…God strategically placed him in a position of saving his entire family.
Joseph’s brothers abandoned him - but God never abandoned him! And that’s the clue I need to pick up on – even though it may seem sometimes from my limited human perspective that God has abandoned me – I am never more in the cradle of God’s hand of protection, care and compassion, than when He is using my life to rescue others!
Perhaps you’ve been abandoned or hurt by someone you love. Not only did Joseph know what that felt like but also Jesus knows what that feels like. The majority of Christ’s followers abandoned Him at the cross. But He had a purpose on the cross. He was there to rescue others. He was there to clean up the mess we had all made by our many sins.
“Hymn writers and artists have conveyed to us a picture of Jesus hanging on a cross on a hill far away. In fact, the place of execution was just outside the city gate, beside the main road leading into Jerusalem. And those to be crucified were only raised two to eighteen inches above the ground. That meant all the dignity and modesty and purity of Jesus’ physical person was stripped away and He was left naked to die in searing, scorching heat, writhing and groaning in agony, at virtually eye level with those who passed by on their way from the city.
“In their rush to get to the temple area in time to purchase a lamb for sacrifice, did the pilgrims preparing a Passover even notice the Lamb that God was sacrificing for their sin? As Jesus poured out His life, people must have passed by without a glance.
“In a small way, are you pouring out your life for those who don’t notice? Jesus understands.” (Anne Graham Lotz)
The purpose in my suffering sometimes is to rescue others from their suffering. I don’t need to doubt God’s love for me. He knows I’m hurting and sometimes that hurting has a really special purpose – to rescue others.
Where is God when I’m hurting?
1. God’s right there with me. He’s prompting positive changes in my life. If I’ll be patient and trust Him, He’ll do some wonderful things in my life. If I’ll yield my will to Him and rest while I’m waiting on Him, He’ll see me through whatever problem I’m facing.
2. God is rescuing others through my suffering. I get to be a part of God’s work – but it means that sometimes God has to put me in the middle of someone else’s mess so I can lift someone else up while I’m down there in the pit of suffering with them.
And thirdly,
GOD IS SHOWING ME THAT HE LOVES ME!
The initial reaction to that statement is, “If God wants to show me how much He loves me why doesn’t He just stop the pain?”
SOMETIMES, and I underscore “sometimes” - not all the time - my hurts are not always because I have done wrong, but sometimes God doesn’t stop the hurting in my life because the pain is meant to keep me from straying off into even more hurtful and harmful territory. He loves me enough to protect me by confronting me with pain to make me think about how I’m living, how I’m thinking or acting. He loves me enough to use my hurting as a boundary that keeps me from hurting myself even more.
"And have you forgotten the encouraging words God spoke to you as his children? He said, ’My child, don’t make light of the Lord’s discipline, and don’t give up when he corrects you. For the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes each one he accepts as his child.’" Hebrews 12:5-6 (NLT)
Circle, “those he loves.” If God didn’t care about you He wouldn’t take the time to get involved in your life.
When my father disciplined me as a boy he would say, “I’m spanking you because I love you.” And I would often think - "as hard as he spanked me - he must really love me!"
If God were as weak-willed as we are He wouldn’t be as consistent in His discipline. But He’s not a doting Father who gives His children everything they want when they want it because He knows that’s not always best for us. We want the pain to stop and don’t you think God wants the pain to stop? He doesn’t enjoy disciplining us any more than we enjoy being disciplined. But He wants to burn the impurities out of our life.
When I was a kid I would watch my grandma Atwood cooking blackberries on her stove. The berries might be for a pie or for preserving for later. But every so often I would notice she would go over to the stove and take a large spoon and skim something off the top of the berries and the berry juice. When I inquired what she was doing she said, “The heat causes the impurities to boil to the top. That’s why we boil the berries in their juice before we preserve them. We’ve got to get the impurities out or the berries will have a bitter taste when we eat them.”
God doesn’t turn the heat on because He doesn’t care. It’s because He does care! He loves you and wants your life to be pure. Pure so you can lead the kind of life He created you to live. A happy and fulfilling life.
Sometimes you’re going to have pain. Sometimes you’re going to hurt. Where is God when this happens? He’s right there with you because He loves you.
Where is God when I’m hurting?
1. God’s right there with me. He’s just prompting positive changes in my life. If I’ll be patient and trust Him, He’ll do some wonderful things in my life. If I’ll yield my will to Him and rest while I’m waiting on Him, He’ll see me through whatever problem I’m facing.
2. God is rescuing others through my suffering. I get to be a part of God’s work – but it means that sometimes God has to put me in the middle of someone else’s mess so I can lift someone else up while I’m down there in the pit of suffering with them.
3. God is showing me that He loves me by reminding me where the boundaries are with His loving discipline.
The question is – am I going to cooperate with God? Am I going to have confidence in Him by yielding my will to Him and express a willingness to be a part of His plan to rescue others by accepting the fact that sometimes I’m going to have to suffer to be a people helper? Am I going to skim the impurities off in my life when God uses my pain to bring those impurities to the surface?
Let’s pray.
