Our Authority Is Our Ally

However, you may be saying, “That’s nice! That is, if my parents would only do that. But they are not even believers. How could they teach me?” I understand your situation. I grew up with parents who are not believers. I just pray you don’t use that as an excuse to disobey your parents. Colossians 3:20 gave this command: “Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.” The verse does not say that your parents have to be Christians first before you obey them. The mere fact that they are your parents entitles them to your obedience. I am not talking about blind obedience. I am not assuming that your parents are perfect or that they always know what’s best for you. Obeying your parents in everything involves sharing your thoughts and feelings. Still, your authority is your ally. Your parents are your partners. Of course, you can always pray that your parents would really get to know the Lord. But that is not a requirement that they must fulfill before you obey them.

Note that it says “obey your parents in everything”. Yes, you read it right, “in everything.” Everything means everything… everything includes everything and excludes nothing… we are to obey our parents in all things. Of course, let me clarify that “everything” does not include the illegal. So, if your parents tell you to break the law of the land, you don’t obey them. So, if they tell you to throw your trash out of the car, just put it in a trash bag for disposal later. Also, “everything” does not include the immoral. So, if your parents tell you to break the law of the Lord, you don’t obey them. For example, if your parents tell you to lie, you are not bound to obey them. With all respect, you may say that you really wanted to obey them but you cannot because it is not in their best interest for you to obey them at this time. But, other than the illegal and immoral, you are to “obey your parents in everything.” And, even if they are not Christians, your parents can and still do teach you things that are right. Your parents can teach you honesty. They can teach hard work. So, focus on the right things that they teach you.

The Message version goes like this: “Children, do what your parents tell you. This delights the Master no end.” You obey the Lord when you obey your parents. How can you say you obey the Lord Whom you can’t see when you can’t obey your parents whom you can see? When you rebel against your parents, you actually rebel against God. One of my favorite authors, Andy Stanley, wrote this, “Teenagers have a tendency to evaluate a rule or request based upon its merits. If they think a rule or request is reasonable—if it makes sense to them or fits in with their plans or doesn’t get in their way—they comply. But if students think that a rule or request is not reasonable or doesn’t make sense or doesn’t fit in with their plans or gets in their way, they tend to believe it is OK to disobey. …The question our students must answer is, who is going to be in control of their lives? As long as their obedience is based upon their own evaluation of the rules and requests handed down by those in authority over them, they are retaining control of their lives. And as long as they are in control, God is on the sidelines.”[3] So, the question is, “Who is in control of your lives? Is it you or God?” One way to measure who’s in control of your life is the way you respond to your authority, to your parents.