Love Who You Are

LOVE WHO YOU ARE

It's easy to develop a poor image of yourself. Today I'll be highlighting some statements one might make if they have a negative view of themselves. If you identify with any of them you will see the reasons why you can replace the negative self-image with a more positive one.

1) "I don't like myself."

Have you ever known someone who didn't like themselves? It wasn't simply that they didn't like something about themselves they actually didn't like themselves. There can be various reasons for that.

Maybe at a young age they were told that they would never amount to anything. Perhaps they were abused or molested and they came to view themselves like they were trash. They might have been bullied or picked last at kickball. They didn't have any friends or the girls laughed whenever he tried to ask them out. They were ostracized or ignored so they felt as if no one cared if they existed. People who deal with this depressing persona feel like the world would be better off without them. The loneliness is unbearable.

But it's not just the lonely ones who feel this way. The irony is you might be someone who is popular and well liked. You have the image of being someone who is stable; even successful. People look at your life and think you have every reason to be happy-but you're not. People would be shocked to know that you actually hated your life-hated yourself.

But you don't show it; you don't allow anyone access to that reality. You put on a brave face around others but inside you feel terrible. When you look in the mirror you're ashamed and maybe even disgusted. And when you're alone at night with your self-loathing thoughts you cry. Maybe you deal with this deep-rooted issue by self medicating; perhaps you're a cutter. This can be a complex problem that might take a while to sort through and resolve but it can be done.

But perhaps you're someone who doesn't feel this badly about yourself. That's good but that doesn't mean there still isn't a problem. You may not go so far as to say you don't like yourself but everyone has things about themselves that they don't like.

We might not hate ourselves but we do get down on ourselves over the bad things we do. And when we do that we can get to the place where we only see the bad and so we view ourselves in a completely negative light. We identify ourselves by our sin instead of by what God has said we are.

But it's hard to believe that God loves us when we don't feel anyone else does. Or even if we do believe someone loves us we don't deserve it. And since we don't like ourselves it's easy to dismiss the love that others show us. "If they really knew me they wouldn't love me. I don't love me-I hate me."

2) "I'm in love with myself (not really)."

Do you know anyone who's arrogant and prideful? Always puffing themselves up or bragging about the things they do? Although there are people who are legitimately full of themselves, for some people their narcissistic behavior is actually a cover for a negative self-image. My egotism can actually be a front for not liking myself.

Although they appear to think highly of themselves in reality they think quite lowly of themselves. So their egotistical behavior is all for show. This is what's known as false pride. They can't allow any hint of self-deprecation to show so they hide behind a mask of narcissism. And their bragging and boasting may be so that others would be convinced of their elevated status as well as looking for validation from others.

Do you know someone who posts a ton of selfies on facebook? On the surface we might think they're doing this because they are narcissistic but they might be doing this because they're looking for validation for how good they look. If others comment about how good they look then they can believe they actually do look good. But that feeling usually doesn't last which is why you see them post picture after picture of themselves; they need constant validation.

This is a big problem. First-I'm looking to get my self-worth from you. And second, I'm determining my worth by something superficial. Look at how many people get major plastic surgery. There are people who have spent unbelievable amounts of money to change or enhance just about every part of their bodies.

What about the women who have spent a truckload of money so they could look like Barbie. And there are guys who have done the same thing to look like Ken. It's sad. This screams no self-worth. I have to completely look like my version of perfection in order to feel good about who I am. And chances are after it's all said and done they still don't feel good about who they are.