Looking At My Lifeline: A Story Of Hope

I have been dealing with progressive kidney failure for nearly five years and the effects upon one's body that come with it. I've endured numerous trips to doctors, specialists, nutritionists, and other experts who have been more than helpful in getting me through this rough spot in my life. I've had to make a lot of adjustments in my diet, my activities, and my ministry without too much complaint from me. This past August I was informed that my function had dwindled down to the point where I would have to look at the probability of dialysis "at some point". That "some point" happened on September 19th at 5:00 AM. I had just finished eating breakfast and was heading to the kitchen to put my dishes in the dishwasher before heading to my study and start work on some sermon ideas. I tripped on the staircase that led from our living room to the kitchen. I started to get up and found that I couldn't. I laid down on the kitchen floor while my son went to get a pillow for my head and my wife called the first responders stationed around the corner from our house. They literally had to carry me to the gurney that was waiting for me outside, and the next thing I knew, I was in the ER of the local hospital.

The ER staff informed me and my wife that my kidney function had totally collapsed, my blood pressure had fallen dangerously low (87/40), and that if I had not called for assistance, I would have died. Well, as one of the main characters in the epic movie "Braveheart" exclaimed as he was being cauterized for a wound, "That'll wake you up in the morning, boy!"" The nephrology (kidney) team wasted no time. I was admitted, stabilized, and then scheduled to have a chest catheter implanted in me the next morning, and immediately be taken to dialysis to begin the first of many treatments until I decided to either start looking into getting a kidney transplant or I got tired of the whole thing, decide to stop all treatments, be placed under hospice care, and eventually go home to be with the LORD (2 Corinthains 5:8; Philippians 1:20-24). All of this showed me that life is truly like a vapor (James 4:13-15), and we are never more than a breath away from facing the King (2 Corinthians 5:10; Hebrews 9:27). I go to the dialysis center three days a week. When I get there, I get weighed to estimate the amount of fluid build-up I have and on how much to take out of me with that day's procedure. Then, I go to the dialysis station where my catheter is cleaned, flushed, and attached to the tubing and machinery that will take my blood a portion at a time, filter it, eliminate all waste products, and return it to my body over a three-to-four-hour period. During that time, I put on a set of headphones to watch TV or read a book that I've packed in my duffel bag or take a nap while the machine does its job.

One evening when I had finished and my nurse was cleaning my catheter, he said something that resonated with me and gave me the inspiration to write this message. He said, "You need to really take good care of this catheter, because right now, it is your LIFELINE." It's true. Without my chest catheter, I have no access to the device that is able to keep me alive at this time. That piece of tubing is the connecting lifeline that I have been given so that my foul, corrupted blood can be cleansed and renewed for a period of time until the next dialysis appointment. If you cannot see the spiritual analogy of this situation, then you need to get your head out of the sand and realize that this life does not consist of the physical realm and temporal surroundings, but that our lives are more valuable and precious than we can ever imagine. Our bodies are not mere random conglomerations of cells and tissues, but we are a unique creation of the LORD God Almighty, fearfully and wonderfully made for HIs glory and for a purpose (Genesis 1:1; Psalm 139:13-18; Isaiah 45:12, 43:13; Acts 17:24; Hebrews 1:10, 11:3).

One thing to point out is that everyone's blood is the same color. There is no "diversity" in its flow, function, or ability to sustain life. Our background, beliefs, education, or status in life makes no difference. If your blood is flowing inside your body, you are living. If it ceases to flow or flows out of your body due to a wound, the color of your skin or the content of your character is not an issue. If you don't receive medical attention immediately, the life that is in your blood will cease to function (Leviticus 17:11), and you will go the way of all humanity (Luke 12:13-21). Without the lifeline of the blood, you're gone, and nothing will change that fact. The precise chemical, biological, and physiological elements that the Sovereign LORD placed within the blood cells of all humanity are what He has decreed for us in order to live, thrive, and function for the time we have in this world. Evolutionary biology cannot provide an adequate explanation as to why blood is the perfect element in our body that we need in order to live. It seems that the idea of "design" gets under their skin for some reason (Romans 1:20-22).