How To Have A Sucessful Marriage Series

How to have a Successful Marriage

If you want a good marriage – a healthy marriage – a God centered marriage – you need to go to the scriptures to see what God has planned for your marriage. Did you know that God wants you be successful – not just in your spiritual life but also on your job, in your social life, and in your family life? In other words He wants you to be successful in all aspects of your life. Listen to what Jeremiah 29:11 has to say:

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11 (NKJV)

God wants you to be a success. And He wants your marriage successful. So let’s go ahead and look at five characteristics of a healthy marriage.

1. To have a successful marriage establish BOUNDARIES.

Let’s look at Genesis 2 together.

Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said: "This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man." Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. Genesis 2:21-24 (NKJV)

Look at what happens here. God causes Adam to sleep and while he is asleep God takes one of his ribs and makes Eve out of it. The Hebrew people have a saying about this passage of scriptures. They say that God did not take a bone from the foot of Adam so that Adam would rule over Eve, neither did the bone come from the head of Adam so the Eve would rule over Adam. But the bone came from the side of Adam so that they could walk side by side as partners, working together, complimenting each other.

From this passage of scripture we see that there is a new relationship established. She is now bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh. She has become a part of him and he has become a part of her. They are to become one flesh. God established a relationship between a husband and wife that is unique. They shall become one flesh. They have become jointly connected. Now we could spend the rest of the day talking about the building the marriage relationship – but we are not going to do that today because of time constrains. Let me just say that you are to keep the marriage relationship sacred. Genesis 2 tells you how to do that.

Look at the last part of our text in Genesis 2. ." Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, notice that in addition to a unique relationship with his wife there is a change in the relationships with other people too.

Set boundaries. Husbands your parents will always be your parents – but when you married your wife she becomes the number one person in your life. Wives your parents will always be your parents – but when you married your husband he becomes the number one person in your life. Guys your football buddies are not the number one person in your life – your wife is. Wives your best girl friend is not to be the number one person in your life – your husband is. And folks be very careful with this. When you have children your kids are not to be the number one person in your life – your spouse is. The children will grow up and leave the nest – (at least we hope so). And when they move out what you will be left with is each other. Keep the home fires burning – keep building on the relationship you have with each other and the way you do this is by setting boundaries with your friends and relatives. The number one relationship you are to have is with your spouse keep it sacred.

2. To have a successful marriage make a deep COMMITMENT.

Look at Matthew 19 with me.

He… said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ’made them male and female,’ and said, ’For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate." Matthew 19:4-6 (NKJV)