How To Handle Betrayal And Rejection In Marriage Series

Here was the man that Jesus trusted implicitly and who knew Jesus as few knew Him. But, as things began to heat up Judas became disillusioned. When he realized that was not going to set Himself up as King, as he thought, he figured he could at least get something out - so he began plotting on how to betray Him and did so for a few pieces of silver. We know the rest of the story. Judas has gone down throughout history as the epitome of betrayal.

C. Peter rejection shows that even the most devoted can fail us. Peter was Jesus most trusted disciple and often promised deep loyalty. Even when Jesus told Peter he would betray Him Peter denied it. And yet, when the heat was on, and just as Jesus predicted, Peter betrayed Him and abandoned Him as His hour of greatest need.

Principle: We live in a fallen world where the most beloved can betray us.

ILLUSTRATE: Kevin Miller tells a personal story that illustrates this point. Right after I finished 6th grade, my family moved to a new town. As I started junior high that fall, I suddenly found myself in a school I didn't know, in a town I didn't know, with people I didn't know. I felt very alone. Nobody knew me, and nobody wanted to talk to me.

Each day I would walk home alone, wondering, Is there a friend here for me? Then one day, a kid named Earl invited me to his house after school. I jumped at it. Earl was kind of like the other kids, but he had shiny hair (he wasn't particularly concerned about personal hygiene). Near his house was a parking lot where the electric company parked its trucks and heavy equipment. Earl knew how to sneak in there, and we clambered all over the big rigs and the augers and had a lot of fun. Earl and I began to build a friendship.

After a couple of months of sizing up this 7th-grade classroom, I made an important realization. The kids who seemed to be the most popular, the kids who were really good at sports, the kids who had the best clothes, the kids whom the girls whispered about and blushed over—were not Earl. They were two guys, Mike and Eddie.

So when Mike and Eddie finally invited me over to their house, I was exhilarated. This was my ticket to the big time. But I had one problem. Wherever Mike and Eddie were, Earl was not; and wherever Earl was, Mike and Eddie were not. And if I was going to hang out with Mike and Eddie, I could not be seen with Earl. I knew it.

So I made a decision. I went over to Mike and Eddie's houses, and I struck up a friendship with them, and I became "in" with those popular kids. When Earl called me, I kept putting him off by saying, "I'm, uh, kind of busy."

All those years since that time, there's still a shame around that betrayal, because the truth is, I betrayed Earl. I handed him another rejection in his life when he'd probably had so many. But I wanted something: I wanted that "in," I wanted that popularity. If I had to hurt him, I would do it. (Kevin Miller, Wheaton, Illinois)

APPLY: That is the essence of betrayal: It says, “I am willing to hurt you to get something for myself. And, in that self-centeredness, we find a lot of pain and disappointment. It is what some of us face at times in our life but it is what God faces every day. He has loved us and has created this marvelous world for us and every day he hears people say it is all a cosmic accident caused by time and chance. They won’t even acknowledge the very laws of nature are His design.