How To Build A Bridge To Parents Series

He believes in Santa Claus

He does not believe in Santa Claus

He is Santa Claus

He looks like Santa Claus

Introduction: I want to throw out a phrase: Blended Family: The Bible does not sugar coat the stories. We are told all the gory details. Jacob and his family a case study for a blended family. God will expose all the ugly and then God comes and redeems the situation.

Romans 8:28

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

In reality we are all blended families.

Sullivan - Oliver

Average family last 8 ½ years before one of them leaves.

60% of all second marriages end in divorce

Why do couples divorce?

1) Money – Control

2) Blendedness is not working

Only 27% of families are what we would call traditional Families.

41% of Americans are single and this is a message on family. Does that mean I don’t care about single people? NO! – Pre-wire you for success

Exodus 20:12

"Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.

Fact: There are not perfect Parents, no perfect kids, no perfect families.

Belief: Respect for Others begins at Home.

Most of the lessons of life come from the home. Not interrupting, how I respond to authority – police, teachers, bosses. Even how to parent.

Observation: How I relate to my parents affects all other relationship

How to Honor my Parents?

1. Accept them

Deut. 26:11

. . . rejoice in all the good things the Lord your God has given to you and your household.

Don’t focus on what they did wrong, honor their effort. Honor the position. They deserve it. This is the starting point.

Proverbs 20:20

If a man curses his father or mother, his lamp will be snuffed out in pitch darkness.

It is very fashionable to blame. But the truth and reality is that bitterness is always self-destructive. Don’t let what you parents did wrong in the past control your future.

Proverbs 23:22

Listen to your father, who gave you life, and do not despise your mother when she is old.

How would I grade my parents parenting skills?

1) Poor 2) Average 3) Excellent

2. Appreciate them

Proverbs 23:22

Listen to your father, who gave you life, and do not despise your mother when she is old.

The sacrifices that they made to raise you.

Food

Diapers

School

Doctors

Average family will spend $250,000 to raise a child

½ a million dollars!!!!!!

How do you show appreciation?

1) Affirm them

2) Show affection

3) Stay in touch

Proverbs 3:27

Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is in your power to act.

What value do you place on their input today?

1) None 2) Some 3) Can’t live with out it

3. Acquit them

Col. 3:13-14

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. [14] And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

How do you honor dishonorable people? Forgive them.

For the sake of the union I am going to let him off - Ford of Nixon pardon

How do you handle the hurts from your childhood?

1) Blame 2) Fake 3) Face

Life Stage Application:

1 Tim. 5:4

But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God.

As a child Honor = quickly, cheerfully, lovingly

As a young person Honor = Accept and Appreciate

As an adult Honor = Affirm them, acquit them, do not abandon them.

Some day we will the aged parent and we will have modeled to our children how we are to be treated in out old age.

Our society uses people and discards them.

Who can we go visit as a church? It’s what Jesus would do. We want to help these people to connect.

Ephes. 6:4

Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

Malachi 4:6

He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers; or else I will come and strike the land with a curse."