Hospice Patients Are Real People Series

Hohum:

A relative asked me why I liked ministering to hospice patients (those with 6 months or less to live according to the medical profession), and I said that I liked ministering to hospice patients because they are real people, more real than other people.

WBTU:

Chaplain Percy McCray ministers to cancer patients and he has found much the same to be true in his ministry. Cancer patients are more real than other people. We can learn a lot from them.

What is the one thing that people in this condition need? People need to be connected to and supported in their humanity. ““A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”” John 13:34, 35, NIV.

What would drive one to minister to those in dire straights? Percy McCray says that after 26 years of ministering to cancer patients, what motivates him is to love people on a level that is so open and so real. Why would someone want to do this for a living, supporting these people? Doesn’t this depress you or drive you to burn out? Sum this up in one word and that is authenticity. A terminal diagnosis reveals who a person really is, get to see a person’s authentic self. There is no facade, there is no pretense, no one is trying to impress others. People are brought to the bedrock of who they are. Everything is taken away, the money, the position, the prestige, people are reduced to who they really are. These are real people who need real love that is not transactional. Think about how many relationships we have that are transactional. We love others because of what they can give to us, what they can do for us. Jesus would go to people who could give so little back. Jesus would heal them or meet their needs in some way and they were unable to do anything for Jesus. So many times our relationships are about, “what is in this for me?” If a person can do little for me, I pass them by. People are not real until they come to a place where the things of this world are unimportant and they just need love and support. This is why I love supporting hospice patients

Thesis: Identify 5 authenticities- things forced on hospice pts

For instances:

1. Being vulnerable

I’ve had opportunities to minister to people in high positions and of low positions of this world. Many of these people came to the place of vulnverability- they have come to realize their mental, physical and emotional limitations. These people have come to the place that they have to find help outside of their wealth, outside of their fame, outside of their position. They can no longer do it on their own. Percy McCray- Sat with Walter Payton- one thing I cannot get over as a world class athlete, I cannot will my body to do what it once did on a football field and that is depressing me. “But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9, NIV. When I am weak then I am strong. These patients get to exchange what they do not have for what God does have. God is able to give us something that we need, but we have to come to a place where we are vulnerable to receive it. God I need you, oh, I need you, every hour I need you, your my one defence, my righteousness, O God how I need you.

2. Being reflective

When one is told they have 6 months or less, they automatically begin to start reviewing, reflecting, considering, start to engage in life review. A person will also think about how they need to fix unresolved issues. Percy McCray- Had opportuntiy to minister to a white lady from a southern city. Had a great relationship with her and was able to talk about many things on her heart. She endured about 45 days of dificult treatments for cancer. Her husband was always there during the visits but he never said anything. After 45 days she was going home and the husband asked for a one on one time with chaplain McCray. The husband said that he was jealous of the relationship the chaplain had with his wife and how he viewed the chaplain with suspicion. Over time he realized if someone from the African American (black) race could come and help his wife so much, he need to reevaluate his prejudicies. This shook Mr. McCray but the husband hugged the chaplain and asked that he be forgiven for the racist views that he had toward Mr. McCray. The husband expressed appreciation for the love shown to his wife and how that made such a difference to them. The husband said that this really made him reflective on his views of other people. Had opportunties to share with those in the African American community and even did funerals for them (only white person there). “Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbour, for we are all members of one body. “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need.” Ephesians 4:25-28, NIV. Share with those in need regardless of who or what they are because they are more open at this time than any other- reflective.