Finding A Mate– God's Way! Series

A. Bad date when... Hey guys, you know you are on a bad date when....

1. She whispers to the waiter, “Please kill me!”

2. You catch her giving her phone number to the guy cleaning your windshield.

3. She keeps calling you, “Bachelor number two”.

4. She says, “Whoa! It is 8:45 already?”

5. She transitions the conversation by saying, “I’ve said enough about me. What do you think about me?”

B. Cory & Girls Dorm: On the first day of college, the Dean addressed the students, pointing out some of the rules: “The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male dormitory is out-of-bounds to all female students. Anyone caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time. He continued, “Anybody caught breaking this rule the second time will be fined $60. Being caught a third time will cost you a fine of $180. Are there any questions. At this point, I understand Cory inquired, “How much for a season pass!”

C. Problems with Dating System: For the past ten years, I’ve taught a seminar on the Dangers of Dating. It hasn’t always been the most popular doctrine, but it has been received with some interesting reactions. In my opinion based upon experience and observation, our American system of Dating is extremely poisonous. 1) It promotes increased sexual desire. 2) It promotes the Isolation from others; 3) It causes Jealousy. 4) It often results in shallow relationships– it often skips the friendship development and heads immediately to the “physical” aspect; 5) Dating often stunts spiritual, mental and emotional growth; 6) It often results in Unnecessary hurt and disappointment. 7) Dating actually creates an artificial environment that makes it impossible for evaluating a person’s character– anyone can look good for a night or two when putting their best foot forward. 8) Dating often promotes Unhealthy patters for marriage– rarely does it promote marriage, but often established patters that easily lead to divorce. 9) Our dating system often distorts the meaning of real love and 10) Dating often distracts young people from their primary responsibility of preparing for the future. Because of these problems, I have concluded that our American “Dating” is often unhealthy and ungodly. Oh it’s fun, but I think you will agree that it is mostly driven by the lust of the flesh.

D. How do you reckon that I find a mate then? Great question. I’d like to encourage God’s people to find the answer from the Bible rather than our culture. I think Genesis 2:15-23 will give us a great start.

15 The Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it. 16 And the Lord God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; 17 but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it you will surely die.” 18 The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” 19 Now the Lord God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. 20 So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. But for Adam no suitable helper was found. 21 So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. 22 Then the Lord God made a woman from the ribi he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. 23 The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’’ for she was taken out of man.”

I. How Do You Find a Mate? We’ll, how did Adam find a mate? He didn’t. God made him one and brought her to Him. And that’s the whole point of this sermon. Personally, I believe in “arranged marriages”– so long as God– our Heavenly Father is doing the arranging. Let me underscore that with two major principles from this text...

A. Marriage better be a matter of God’s CONCLUSION. In our text, it was God’s conclusion that, ‘it is not good for Adam to be alone– he needed a helper!” That wasn’t Adam’s answer, that was God’s conclusion.

B. Marriage better be a matter of God’s PROVISION. After all, who is best qualified for choosing your mate for life? God or you? If I love Matthew 6:33–“Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness and all these things will be provided for you as well.” The text suggests that we are not to worry about what we’ll eat, what we’ll wear and I believe we can include– “who we will marry.” And so if you are getting married, you must ask yourself, “Are you convinced that it is God’s conclusion that you should get married?” And, “Are you convinced that this is God’s choice as your mate.”