Fear Of Loneliness Series

How deep do imagine those relationships went? They were shallow because real friends put aside self-serving agenda and help where it’s needed. Here’s the attitude you must adopt to build enduring friendships.

"Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves."

Romans 12:10 (NIV)

Really caring about one another costs effort and energy. It takes time and it takes risks.

"Wounds from a friend are better than many kisses from an enemy."

Proverbs 27:6 (NLT)

"A true friend always stabs you in the front."

Oscar Wilde

"As iron sharpens iron, a friend sharpens a friend."

Proverbs 27:17 (NLT)

Affirmation

To build enduring relationships you must also learn to affirm. Tell the other person how much they mean to you. Let them know by your words and actions that they are cherished.

"So encourage one another and build each other up..."

1 Thessalonians 5:11 (NLT)

Stu Weber, "Some One to Lean On" Focus on the Family Magazine (June 1996).

Writing in a recent issue of Focus on the Family magazine author Stu Weber illustrates the need for a Christian "buddy" to help us survive the tough times.

In 1967 a grizzled old noncom at Fort Benning, Ga. taught [the soul-buttressing impact of "mutual mentoring"] ... to a formation of ramrod-straight troops: "Never go into battle alone!"

The war in Vietnam was building to its peak, and one stop for young army officers was the U.S. Army Ranger School at Fort Benning. The venerable, steely-eyed veteran told us the next nine weeks would test out mettle as it had never been tested.

The sergeant said many wouldn’t make the grade--it was just too tough. (Turned out he was right. Of 287 in the formation that day, only 110 finished the nine weeks.)

I can still hear that raspy voice cutting through the morning humidity like a serrated blade. "We are here to save your lives," he preached. "We’re going to see to it that you overcome all your natural fears--especially of height and water. We’re going to show you just how much incredible stress the human mind and body can endure. And when we’re finished with you, you will be the U.S. Army’s best. You will not only survive in combat, you will accomplish your mission!"

Then, before he dismissed the formation, the hardened Ranger sergeant announced our first assignment. We’d steeled ourselves for something really tough -- running 10 miles in full battle gear or rappelling down a sheer cliff. So the noncoms first order caught us off guard.

He told us to find a buddy. Some of us would have preferred the cliff. "This is step one," he growled. "You need to find yourself a Ranger buddy. You will stick together. You will never leave each other. You will encourage each other, and, as necessary, you will carry each other.

It was the Army’s way of saying, "Difficult assignments require a friend. Together is better. You need someone to help you accomplish the tough course ahead."

We all need buddies to help us "take the hill." We cannot "do" life alone. That’s not the way God designed us. The question is, "Will we begin building those crucial relationships or keep playing it safe?"