Dating For Dummies - Part 1 Series

Ahhh, Dating. Dating makes everybody feel like a dummy at some point or another. You see that girl or guy of your dreams, and you instantly get sweaty palms (or pits), your face turns red, and you got those butterflies in your stomach. You often may not know what to say, or you try and put your best foot forward, and then you say something totally stupid. It’s especially difficult if your meeting someone for the first time. Adam and Eve were the first ever blind date! I bet the first thing he said was “WHOA, MAN!” And thus, she was named, woman. After that, he probably didn’t know what to say, but since they were both naked, he didn’t really have to think of something to say so she’d take her shirt off.

Things have changed quite a bit since then, and over the years, dating has transformed into this who’s who, popularity contest among classmates, friends, co-workers, and celebrities. All of them vying to find and date the right person, and some of them not wanting to get caught, while others flaunt their newly found soul mate like it’s the latest PRADA bag. As if to say, “ooh, look what I’ve got. Isn’t it HOT!”

I guess I wonder sometimes, what is dating like for the average teenager? What’s the whole point of dating? What are some of your thoughts—what is the point of dating? (allow some discussion)

I had some of those same thoughts when I was a teenager. I used to think that you had to be dating someone to be cool. That’s why I got a girlfriend—yeah, I wanted to make out with her, too. But, in reality, I wanted to be considered cool. Tonight, we’re starting a new series on Dating for Dummies. About 10 years ago, I picked up this little book (and I do mean little) because I was having a little trouble finding and dating the right kind of girl. I actually thought it might have tips and tricks to help me in my pursuits. I guess I might have went through a phase like this guy (show napoleon dynamite clip).

If you are remotely like this in some small way, you’re probably wondering who would date you. Like, what kind of skills should you try to acquire before you ask the girl of your dreams out. Like she’s gonna say no if you don’t know how to wield a pair of nunchucks.

So, if you’re ready, I’m going to give you some free advice—my own little dating for dummies that I’ve found from learning things the hard way, from reading a few dating books, and looking into what God’s plan is.

Dating is NOT just a game we play to have fun. Dating is fun, and meant to be enjoyable, but if you’re not dating for some of the right reasons, then pain is in your future. Can you date and avoid pain? Probably not. But, I think the main purpose for dating is to find the kind of person you want to marry. Or better yet, to figure out God’s plan for who He wants you to be with.

Here’s what we do know about God’s plan: God designed man and woman at the beginning of time to be together, to procreate, and to fulfill each other’s needs and desires. He also designed you to have a companion. Genesis 2:18 says, “and God said, ‘it is not good for man to be alone, I will make a companion who will help him.’” So, God doesn’t want you to be alone.

Well, that’s all nice and good, but where do I find the secret formula to figure out who God wants me to be with? I mean, is it hiding in the pages of this incredibly looooong book?!??!? I think if you’re asking these types of questions, then you might be on the right track. If we know that God is the intelligent designer of this universe and he created you and me, and He doesn’t want us to be alone, then it’s only right to think that he’s got some ideas about how to NOT be alone, right?

A problem that most people start off with in dating is just that. They try to do dating, and find the right person based on looks, and personality, and hobbies, and likes and dislikes, but they do all that without considering what God thinks, or what God has to say. If you’re doing that, you’re doing it all WRONG!!!

Dating for Dummies tip # 1: Start with an Intelligent Designer. Think about this for a minute. For many of you, prom is coming up, right? Well, let’s say I was put in charge of making your prom dress. I know, it probably wouldn’t even cross your mind to have me make it, but bear with me. You come to me and you have these amazing drawings or pictures of your ideal dress for prom. (show pic) But what I end up creating after gathering my duct tape and frizzy material might look something like this (ugly dress pic), but a LOT worse. But, if you take that idea for a dress to someone like Dolce and Gabbana or Versace or some incredibly talented designer, then you’re gonna have the best looking dress in the place. It’s kind of like this, when you decide, or your parents decide, you are ready to start dating, you automatically think you know how to find a good mate, and you start dating all these losers and you get your heart broken time after time, because you didn’t take your ideas to the right designer. If God has your best interests in mind, which HE does. Then you’ve got to include him in the dating process.