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Summary: How should you console someone suffering?

How should we console loved ones who are grieving? I believe we can learn from Job’s friends as Job dealt with his sufferings. Please open your Bibles to the Book of Job….

Let us remind ourselves of what happened to Job….

Job 1: Without Job’s knowledge, Satan challenged God by taking away Job’s children and much of his possessions! Through all the loss and sufferings, Job did not sin and remained a godly man.

Job 2: Again without Job’s knowledge, Satan challenged God again by giving Job painful sores all over his body. Job sat on a pile of garbage scraping off his sores without sinning against God! Job’s 3 friends came and emphatized with Job as they all sat together quietly in the pile of ashes for 7 days! But Job’s wife told him to curse God and die!

How should we console loved ones who are grieving? From Job Chapters 1-2 alone, we can note 2 things: emphatizing with someone suffering is good but telling a person to curse God is not good!

Let us also note something important missing: Prayer was missing in dealing with the grieving of Job!

Job 3: Job finally spoke to himself, his friends, and to God. Job did not curse God but cursed his birthday. Take a look at v25-26 of Job 3…. Job stated…

Knowing he did not do anything wrong, Job did not curse God but he complained publicly of his sufferings! I think there are 2 things that Job did wrong: again Job didn’t really pray to God, just self-pity, then he opened himself up for “advice” from his friends.

Let’s read some of the advice from friend Eliphaz…. there’s a lot to read, but hang in there with me, because this is one of the points in giving advice! Good advice is love and love is thinking about the betterment of the other person, not hearing all the stuff you know! Read along with me Job 4 & 5.…

4:1-6 Eliphaz reminds Job of how he had helped many people; and so now, he tells Job to help himself!

4:7-21 Eliphaz, in too many words, basically was saying that God judges!

5:1-9 Eliphaz tells Job that all godly people, including Eliphaz himself, that Job call on God to forgive him!

5:10-27 Eliphaz tells Job who God is and who God blesses!

In summary, what was Eliphaz advice to Job? Eliphaz basically told Job that because he is suffering so much, he must confess his sins to God!

What can we learn from Job’s friend Eliphaz in consoling a loved one grieving?

Let’s note the right things: Eliphaz emphatized with Job and brought up God!

The wrong things: Eliphaz never prayed. Eliphaz gave advice not requested! Eliphaz spoke so boldly, placing himself on a pedestal (egotistic)! Eliphaz assumed Job sinned!

But let us not let Job off the hook here… Let us note, also without being asked, Job made a mistake of publicly complaining about his troubles instead of praying to God!

And so, what Biblical Principles should we follow when we ourselves or our friends are dealing with troubles?

1. We must always take time to “Be still and know God”! (Psalm 46)

With all the stuff we have today, we can easily be busy with so many things! Are we allowing ourselves become so busy, we can not take 15 minutes daily to ponder about God? Is God in our daily schedule? Let us ask ourselves daily: Who is God to me?

And like a loving friend and a friend we love, God actually tells us to talk to Him constantly!

2. In response to 1 Thessalonians 5:17, always pray and acknowledge who God is!

3. Unless you are wanting advice, be careful of publicly complaining about your troubles! This doesn’t mean we should not share what we are going through but share because you want to honor God not for self-pity! Going back to point #2, Pray and ask for God’s leading before you share!

4. Do not give advice unless you are asked!

5. When dealing with a loved one suffering, emphatize with them, pray with them, and if asked, direct them to God’s Word not your own wisdom!

Take a moment now to quietly ponder about these things and talk to God about dealing with troubles……….

Benediction: Psalm 46……

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