Communication Skills

COMMUNICATION SKILLS

INTRODUCTION: I’ve read articles that refer to the decline in society today because of the increase in texting. You’ve seen the commercials that have two people sitting right next to each other but they’re texting instead of talking. This has become the norm for today’s generation. As we advance in technology we are digressing socially. We have social media but lack social skills-verbally at least. But it isn’t just the teens and twenty-somethings that have this problem; anyone can be socially lacking in one way or another.

1) The challenge.

• I’m shy.

Some people are more outgoing than others. Some people find it easy to go up to complete strangers and strike up a conversation while others are more reclusive. Some people’s shyness stems from having a speech impediment. This can make it more difficult or embarrassing to want to carry a conversation. Communicating in and of itself can be a challenge let alone when there are obstacles to face. But regardless of our obstacle God will enable us to overcome and be successful.

When God called Moses to speak to Pharaoh about letting the Israelites go, Moses was concerned. He asked God what would happen if the people didn’t listen to him. God tried to assure Moses by showing him that he was going to be able to perform miracles. But Moses was still hesitant.

Exodus 4:10-14, “Moses said to the LORD, “O Lord, I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.” The LORD said to him, “Who gave man his mouth? Who makes him deaf or mute? Who gives him sight or makes him blind? Is it not I, the LORD? Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say.” But Moses said, “O Lord, please send someone else to do it.” Then the LORD'S anger burned against Moses and he said, “What about your brother, Aaron the Levite? I know he can speak well. He is already on his way to meet you, and his heart will be glad when he sees you.”

God was angry with Moses for not trusting him. I’m sure I would’ve been concerned about facing Pharaoh but God would want me to trust in his ability to replace my inability. We may have to face obstacles like having a limited vocabulary or a nervous stutter or something but we can be courageous, knowing God wants to use us; he wants us to trust in his power to enable us to overcome our difficulties and be effective communicators.

• I’m not interested.

Another challenge we face is having regular communication. This is seen mainly in the family unit. Professor H.W. Jurgen, a West German sociologist, claims that married couples chat with one another 70 minutes a day in the first year of their marriage. This drops to 30 minutes a day in the second year and then only to 15 minutes a day in the 4th. His research shows that by the eighth year, a husband and wife, typically, share hardly any small talk and become nearly silent with one another.

This seems hard to believe but the fact is it’s easy to have a lack of communication in the home. We go about our day and when we get home we become involved with various things. It has become less common for families to sit at the table together during meals. This used to be a good opportunity for communication to happen but it doesn’t happen much anymore. We’re either glued to our phone, even at the dinner table, or we’re relatively silent as we eat our meal. With the attachment we have to our electronic devices it’s rare to have a quiet environment where the only sounds are two people engaging in conversation.

Norm Wright said, “Most human relational problems can be traced back to poor communication.” If we want to have healthy relationships we need to want to have healthy communication skills. But we have to be ready to work at it. Good communication involves a commitment to keep it fresh and engaging. We need to dedicate ourselves to having ongoing communication outside of small talk. Don’t just say your day was okay talk about it-give some details. For men it takes coming out of our comfort zone and talking about our feelings. For women it may mean talking less about your feelings!

On Sundays it should be easy for families to have something interesting to talk about when they get home from church. You can spend the afternoon talking about what you got out of the wonderful sermon that day! It may be challenging but if our relationships are going to thrive then developing good communication skills needs to be a priority.