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Building Blocks For A Better Marriage Series
Contributed by James Kelley on Jul 24, 2001 (message contributor)
Summary: Here are ten practical steps to strenghten your marriage.
Building strong families gets tougher every day.
Children spend less than 30 minutes per week in meaningful conversation with their mothers and less than 15 minutes per week with their fathers.
Households headed by unmarried people living together have quadrupled since 1970.
According to a recent Gallup poll, 73% of Americans, under age 45, believe that life spent with the same partner is both unusual and unnecessary.
Six out of ten children live in a single parent household.
The cost of the average divorce is $19,365.00.
In the average divorce, women and children suffer a 73% decline in their standard of living.
The death rate for divorced men 35-60 years of age is 130% higher than their happily married counterparts.
In a Gallup poll, 89% of people, currently going through a divorce, sited a family history of divorce as being a contributing factor to the ending of their marriage.
In America every 24 hours:
3,000 children see their parents divorced.
1,629 children are put in adult jail.
3,228 children run away from home.
1,512 children drop out of school.
7,742 teens become sexually active.
Teenagers, on average, experience sexual intercourse for the first time at age 15.
When sexual intimacy is cheapened, so it the general view of marriage.
When commitment breaks down, so do marriages.
Here are 10 steps to a better marriage:
1. Make commitment not feeling the foundation of your marriage.
Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. Hebrews 13:4
1 out of 3 marriages end in divorce.
1 out of 50 marriages end in divorce if the couple had a church wedding.
1 out of 105 marriages end in divorce if the couple attends church regularly.
1 out of 1,155 marriages end in divorce if the couple attends church regularly and has family devotions.
2. Learn to draw a very large circle of love.
And you husbands must love your wives with the same love Christ showed the church. He gave up his life for her. Ephesians 5:25
He drew a circle that shut me out,
Heretic, rebel, a thing to flout,
But love and I had the wit to win,
We drew a circle that took him in.
3. Humble yourself before your spouse.
And further, you will submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Ephesians 5:21
4. Continually say positive things to your spouse.
Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. Ephesians 4:29
5. Never go to bed angry with your spouse.
And "don’t sin by letting anger gain control over you." Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry. Ephesians 4:26
6. Forgive your spouse.
If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins. Matt 6:14-15
7. Consider what God wants in your situation not what you want.
Don’t repay evil for evil. Don’t retaliate when people say unkind things about you. Instead, pay them back with a blessing. That is what God wants you to do, and he will bless you for it. 1 Pet 3:9
8. Visualize what your life can be together.
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jer 29:11
9. Pray together regularly.
Pray at all times and on every occasion in the power of the Holy Spirit. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all Christians everywhere. Eph 6:18
10. Do not give up.
So don’t get tired of doing what is good. Don’t get discouraged and give up, for we will reap a harvest of blessing at the appropriate time. Gal 6:9