Be Wise About Friendship Series

A. We are in a sermon series on the book of Proverbs called “God’s Wisdom: More Valuable Than Gold.”

1. So far in the series we have focused on how valuable God’s wisdom is and how that the proper reverence and respect for God is the beginning of wisdom.

2. Since today is the Sunday of our youth rally and I had in the back of my mind that I wanted to address a subject that was especially applicable to young people.

3. In chapter 1,after Solomon introduced the statement that “the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom,” can you guess what is the very next subject that Solomon addressed? Friendship…the influence of companions…peer pressure.

4. But guess what? This isn’t a subject that just applies to young people – the wise choice of friends and companions applies to people of all ages and all stages of life.

B. You know I like to start with something on the light side, so let’s do that before we get into the serious application of God’s truth.

1. What do you call a group of friends who love math? Algebros.

2. What do you do if you are walking in the woods with your friend and your friend is bitten by a rattlesnake? You will need to find another friend.

3. How do you define what a friend is?

a. A friend is someone who knows all about you and loves you anyway.

b. A friend is someone who steps in when the world steps out.

c. A friend is someone who never gets in the way, unless you are headed in the wrong direction.

C. One of the resources I am using for this sermon series is a book by my friend Tommy South titled “Don’t Be Dumb! The Wisdom of Proverbs for Today.”

1. Tommy’s chapter on “Don’t be Dumb about Your Friends” was especially helpful in my preparation of this sermon.

D. There’s an old saying that suggests that you can judge a man by the company he keeps.

1. There’s a lot of truth in that, because people do tend to choose as friends people who share their values, interests, and outlook on life.

a. And so, if you know a person’s friends, then you know something about that person.

2. But on the other hand, that saying isn’t an absolute truth, because Matthew 11:19 describes Jesus as “a friend of tax collectors and sinners.”

a. Those words were spoken by Jesus’ enemies, and they weren’t intended as a compliment.

b. Jesus did keep company with some people that most “decent folks” of His day regarded as pretty shady, people not known for their high moral and ethical standards - people who were nothing like himself.

c. Jesus’ reason for befriending people like that was that He knew He could influence them positively and He knew that they would not be able to have a negative effect on Him.

d. Jesus wanted them to know of God’s love for everyone, even the most sinful and despised; and he knew that sometimes it’s the people on the bottom of the morality ladder who are most often open to redemption.

3. But that doesn’t negate the general truthfulness of that old saying.

a. Usually you can judge a person’s character - and especially his or her wisdom - by the folks they spend time with as friends.

b. That saying isn’t found in Proverbs, but I think the wise man, Solomon would have agreed.

c. Solomon had quite a bit to say about friendship and one of the main things he emphasized was that few things in life affect us and shape who we are quite as much as our friends.

d. Therefore, it certainly pays to be wise about friendship.

E. Let’s talk for a minute about what real friendship is.

1. Today’s world is confused about a lot of things, and the meaning of true friendship is certainly one of them.

2. For many, the word “friend” is a polite description of people they hardly know.

a. In this case “friend” has become something of a synonym for “acquaintance.”

b. In the age of Facebook, the word “friend” has become almost meaningless, or at least seriously distorted.

c. Facebook users have turned “friend” into a verb which means something like “I’ve added you to my list of people I hardly know, if at all.”

d. Likewise, to “unfriend” someone simply means they’re no longer on that list.

e. This gives meaning to what clinical psychologist Roger Fransecky has described as “an illusion of closeness in a complex world of continuous partial attention.”

f. Because so many people have adopted this concept of friendship, Facebook now limits members to no more than 5000 “friends.”

g. Without a doubt, the concept of “friendship” needs clarification for our modern world.