A Spirit-Filled Marriage

A Spirit-filled Marriage

Ephesians 5: 22-33

Through our study in recent weeks, we have discovered much about our walk with the Lord and among the world. We have been challenged to walk in love, righteousness, light, and awareness. In our text, Paul continues to deal with the walk of believers, but his focus has shifted somewhat. He now deals with the marriage relationship and challenges believers to pursue a spirit-filled marriage.

A Spirit-filled marriage is a profound representation of Christ's love, requiring mutual submission that leads to deep connection and growth, transforming struggles into opportunities for grace and unity. Christians are admonished to cultivate Spirit-filled marriages that reflect Christ's love, fostering unity and understanding amidst struggles and weaknesses, while offering a model of sacrificial love that can heal and restore relationships.

As we discuss the admonitions within the text, I want to consider: A Spirit-filled Marriage. Marriages developed on mutual submission to one another and the Lord reflect the relationship between Christ and His church.

I. The Humility of the Wife (5:22-24) – In these verses, Paul speaks of the role of the wife. Notice I referred to her role as the humility of the wife, not the humiliation of the wife. Her biblical role is often misunderstood and even misguided at times. We must clearly understand the Lord’s intention regarding the wife. Consider:

A. The Instruction (22) – Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. The Lord desires the wife to submit herself unto her husband. This is difficult for some to embrace, even though it is clearly revealed in Scripture. I believe many have a difficult time with this because some men have distorted this truth, and even abused it. Submission on the part of the wife never implies she is inferior to her husband. The woman is not a second-rate citizen or of lesser value within the home. She has an important and valuable role to play. In fact, most homes are held together spiritually by godly wives.

Submission in the text means “to place in order; to place under in an orderly fashion.” This doesn’t speak of spiritual character, but of physical, positional, and functional order. A godly wife doesn’t feel threatened by this because it is ordained of God. Her submission is never a problem when the husband knows his place and meets his expectations in the relationship.

B. The Motivation (22-23) – Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. [23] For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Paul speaks of the motivation involved in the wife’s submission. She submits to her husband as unto the Lord. She knows God has ordained the husband to be the head of the home. She understands that marriage is the most beautiful picture of the relationship believers have with Christ. As she submits to her husband, she does so knowing she is following the instruction of the Lord and honoring Him with the life she lives. (There are cases where the husband doesn’t behave in such a way to earn her submission, but she continues because it honors the Lord.)

C. The Representation (24) – Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Although it is difficult at times, a submissive wife knows the value of her position and the testimony she bears through submission to the God ordained order. As she submits to the leadership of her home, she bears witness to her submission to Christ the Lord. Her life stands as a public example of the church’s submission to Christ.

My spiritual life has been greatly impacted by godly women who chose to follow the direction of the Lord rather than embrace public sentiment and rebel against her husband. I would never advocate or support spousal abuse; and this passage doesn’t either, but a woman who willingly submits to her husband bears witness to the saving grace of God and her relationship to Christ. It is revealed in a tangible way that cannot be ignored or denied by those around her.

II. The Responsibility of the Husband (5:23-29) – Here Paul reveals the responsibility of husbands. Men relish the thoughts of submission from the wife, but often fail to fulfill their God given responsibilities. He is more accountable for the home than the wife. We discover:

A. He is to Lead (5:23) –For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. The Bible is clear that the man is to be the head of the wife and the home. The husband is expected to provide leadership within the home. Most men relish the thought of being head of the home. This is ordained of God, but many have a distorted view of what God has said. Being the head of the home is not being a dictator in the home. We are not called to lord over our wives, but to lead them.