A Oneness Marriage

INTRODUCTION

Opening: The pastor was visiting the fourth-grade Sunday School class to talk about marriage as part of the lesson. He asked the class, "What does God say about marriage?" Immediately one boy replied, "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do." Did you know what you were doing when you got married? So many of us went into it blindly, rather clueless.

Question: Why did you get married? For sex, romance, companionship, security, children? God has woven into the DNA of the human heart a craving for oneness – soul hunger. I’m reminded of a television advertisement that underscores this. A boyfriend is doing everything just to please his girlfriend. He does yoga with her. He purchases feminine products for her. He does laundry with her. Finally, while they are relaxing on the couch, she reaches for his Dr. Pepper. And the next thing we see, he’s up off the couch and running down the street with his Dr. Pepper and his girl-friend has this puzzled look on her face.

Observation: It’s a privilege to become one with another human being. It’s also painful because to become one, we have to give up a part of ourselves. Instead of building oneness, so many bail on oneness, not giving love a chance.

Quotation: “Weddings are easy; marriages are difficult. The couple wants to plan a wedding; I want to plan a marriage. They want to know where the bridesmaids will stand; I want to develop a plan for forgiveness… I can do a wedding in twenty minutes with my eyes shut. A marriage takes year after year after year of alert, wide-eyed attention (Peterson, God’s Message, 178).” Marriage is what you create after the wedding is over.

Illustration: I think when life gets tough, though, we come to understand the value of that oneness that we have worked so hard to achieve. Dennis Rainey shares how that this horrible year began when he got his fifth job and made his sixth move in five years. He was on the road for six weeks with his 2 year old daughter and 8 month old son. Someone stole Barbara’s purse and Dennis’ wallet. They ended up camping out in Colorado and got a deluge of rain. They finally made it home and had to leave again for 3 weeks because his Dad died. They arrived back in Little Rock and began to receive partial pay-checks because he worked for Campus Crusade for Christ. At the same time, he needed $2,000 of dental work done. A short time later, his brother had a heart attack in the dead of winter and had to go run the family propane business. He arrived back home to discover that his son needed major abdominal surgery. The spring seasons passed quietly. But in June, his wife was rushed to the hospital with heart complications. Later, she was found to be pregnant! Dennis said all they could do was just hang on. Life seemed so out of control. Dennis says the temptation to withdraw from one another is greatest in a time of crisis. You must learn to tackle your problems together. You lose perspective if you don’t.

Transition: Not only does God want you to experience oneness with a soul-mate; you need oneness to weather the storms of life.

Quotation: I think that it’s appropriate to go to the Book of Beginnings for some marriage insights. You can have a oneness marriage if you’ll give love a chance. One writer wrote: “Love isn’t an act, it is a whole life. It’s staying with her now because she needs you. It’s knowing you and she will still care about each other when sex and daydreams, fights and futures are all on the shelf and done with. Love, well, I’ll tell you what love is. It’s when you’re 75 and she’s 71, each of you listening for the other’s footsteps in the next room, each afraid that sudden silence, a sudden cry could mean a lifetime’s talk is over (Rainey, 34).”

Title: Marriage Mystery – A Oneness Marriage

Text/Key Word: In Genesis 2:23-25, we find FOUR ONE-WORD PRINCIPLES, RIVETS that apply to the marriage relationship in every age or culture.

Illustration: Do you know what a rivet is? Some are as small as your pinky finger and some are as large as a man’s arm, and when they fasten two pieces of steel together, skyscrapers can stand for a hundred years due to their strength.

Context: In Genesis, when man fell, it wasn’t as if something was added to his nature. Rather, something was lost that forever altered his nature. Man lost a relationship of intimacy with God and one another. Our nature became isolated and sinful as a result of this loss. It infects our relationships.