Marriage, Divorce, Remarriage & Singleness Series

Marriage, Divorce, Remarriage, & Singleness

Marriage is God’s gift to humankind. It is intended to meet our innermost needs – physically; emotionally; and spiritually. What God intends is not always what people experience. When we live as children of the light it impacts the sacred covenant of marriage

Look Back – Paul’s Passion for God’s People

1 Corinthians 1: The Cross of Jesus

1 Corinthians 2: The Spirit of God

1 Corinthians 3: A Temple of God

1 Corinthians 4: A Spiritual Father

1 Corinthians 5: A High Calling

1 Corinthians 6: Free From Sin

Quick Scan:

About Marriage: 7:1-9

About Divorce: 7:10-14

About Remarriage: 7:15-16

About Singleness: 7:17-40

What does Paul Say about Marriage?

A Good Marriage is in Debt

3 The husband should give his wife all that he owes her as his wife. And the wife should give her husband all that she owes him as her husband.

4 The wife does not have full rights over her own body; her husband shares them. And the husband does not have full rights over his own body; his wife shares them.

In marriage there is a shared ownership of life

It’s not about what you get from being married. It is about what you owe in marriage. It is about the debt you owe the person you have vowed to make your soul mate.

People think that love is two young people stuck together.

That is not love. It is attraction. It can be lust. It is often brief.

A group of small children were asked, "What can men and women do to get along better?" Here are their responses:

(Neil, age 8) "My mom should try ice hockey."

(Chris, age 9) "Girls like to stay clean and healthy and brush their teeth, and boys don’t care."

(Jennifer, age8) "They should just understand that women are more mature than men."

(Julie, age 9) "Men and women shouldn’t talk about money."

(Kate, age 8) "They could understand better if they listened better."

Good marriages come from both partners being focused on the other person.

Almost every marriage begins with hope and high expectations. (There are a few exceptions. Shotgun marriages in the twentieth century and television reality shows in the twenty-first century come to mind)

Marriage is the establishment of a fence of protection called a covenant that surrounds the relationship of a man and a woman built on the bonds of love

The Four Bonds of love are:

Eros – Erotic and physical attraction

Storge – Nurturing care and concern

Pheleo – Friendship and common values

Agape – Sacrificial love

It takes all four to make the bond strong and vibrant. The covenant of marrage protects the bond and gives it the space needed for the relationship to grow and prosper. The vow "til death do us part" is important to the ability of the relationship to breathe and live.

So what does Paul Say about Divorce? Simply put: Don’t Divorce – Remember your Vows.

10 Now I give this command for the married people. (The command is not from me; it is from the Lord.) A wife should not leave her husband. 11 But if she does leave, she must not marry again, or she should make up with her husband. Also the husband should not divorce his wife.

My wife and I are an imperfect example of this. We are celebrating 32 years of marriage on July 31st. The only reason that this is happening is that we have walked, crawled, and drug ourselves through the driest and most barren deserts in our relationship. It has not been easy but it has been worth it. We have so many shared memories of times past. We have a family that is together. We enjoy children and grand children that are the result of our marriage and they are all a blessing to us. It is for a variety of reasons. It is mostly because we made the decision to stick it out.

It reminds me of the reporter that asked a couple in there 90’s who had been married for 70 years if they ever considered divorce. The woman answered, “Divorce? – No. Murder? – Yes.”

If you are married – No matter how bad it is today you can survive it and it can get better tomorrow – but only if you will be committed to your promise.

Remember that God hates divorce – Malachi 2:16 (NCV)

16 The LORD God of Israel says, “I hate divorce. And I hate people who do cruel things as easily as they put on clothes,” says the LORD All-Powerful.

So what does Paul say about Remarriage?

He speaks of the unequally-yoked relationship

12 For all the others I say this (I am saying this, not the Lord): If a Christian man has a wife who is not a believer, and she is happy to live with him, he must not divorce her. 13 And if a Christian woman has a husband who is not a believer, and he is happy to live with her, she must not divorce him. 14 The husband who is not a believer is made holy through his believing wife. And the wife who is not a believer is made holy through her believing husband. If this were not true, your children would not be clean, but now your children are holy.