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Modern Family - Pt. 3 - Arranged Marriages Series
Contributed by Steve Ely on Oct 23, 2012 (message contributor)
Summary: We are a long ways from the days of "Leave it to Beaver"and "The Brady Bunch"! What does God have to say to the "Modern Family"?
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Modern Family Pt. 3 – Arranged Marriages
The Partridge Family ain’t singing no more. Family Affairs has a whole new meaning now that Mr. French would have never imagined. We will never be able to go back to yesterday. We must learn to deal with today and tomorrow. However, even though we are in the modern age I believe there is still some old truths that modern family's need today.
So I have told you:
Marriage matters to God and more specifically your marriage matters to Him. Not only did He institute the first marriage He was and is involved in yours right now.
Happily ever after doesn't have to be a fairy tale but does require hard and consistent work. You don't stumble into a perfect marriage. A bad marriage only becomes a good marriage with work. A good marriage only becomes a great marriage with work!
If we are not careful we give our marriages away.
God can give us our marriage back! A damaged marriage doesn't have to equate to a doomed marriage. God still has the ability to bind up the broken and turn hopeless situations
We are treasure hunters. We all have a treasure inside of us but to find the treasure you have to be willing to dig through the dirt.
You unearth the treasure with honor.
So today I want to talk to you about arranged marriages. In modern times we don’t hear about arranged marriages like we used to. There are many examples of arranged marriages in the Word. However, in those passages an arranged marriage is a marriage in which the bride/groom is selected by the parents and the marriage is established without any input from the ones who are being married. That is not what I want to talk to you about when I talk about arranged marriage. The word “arrange” means to set in order. Another word that would fit is the word “planned”. We think that preparation isn’t needed. We think that our commitment will trump lack of preparation. That isn’t true! A promise is no good unless you are prepared to fulfill the promise! If you are at the place of making a promise to one another you better stop long enough to make preparation to fulfill that promise!
We hear about planned parenthood but very little about planned marriage! We know that without planning we will fail at work. We will fail at school. We will fail at athletics. We know we will fail in every area without planning except it seems in marriage. We spend months and perhaps years planning every detail of the wedding ceremony and even the honeymoon and then the planning ceases! We plan the wedding and fail to plan the marriage! Some of our weddings came off perfect but our marriage is a hot mess because we have no plan, no order, no shared dreams, and no shared vision of where we are headed. And without a vision the marriage perishes!
It’s funny that we plead with God to arrange our wedding . . . at least I did. Maybe you just took the first thing that came along but I sought God to help me find the right one. But then how many of us ask God to help us pick the right one but fail to ever seek His assistance in ordering our marriage once we find that one?
In Ephesians 5:1 we are told:
“Watch what God does, and then you do it, like children who learn proper behavior from their parents.”
The pattern of arranging or planning is something we should learn and practice.
Why should we arrange our marriage? Because we follow the example of our God. He has been planning for a marriage since the beginning of time. He has planned the wedding supper (the wedding) but He has also planned where will live and how we will spend our time! He has worked to plan eternity! He is a God of order. He is a God of planning!
Text: Genesis 2:24
Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
The word “Cleave” literally means “glued together” or they are compatible and in agreement on the major issues of life.
In other words, their marriage is arranged!
Here are 4 key areas you had better arrange which you can only do if you are willing to talk, confront, and prayerfully work through the details:
1. Time. You must make time for one another. Your job will demand your time. Your kids will demand time. Your education will demand time. Your house will demand time. Our society will demand your time! And as busy as it is I want to remind you that should demand time for one another. One day it will just be you two again and if you don’t take time for one another now you won’t know one another later. If you are not diligent you can end up with not only an empty nest but an empty life and heart! Sharing your home with a stranger! We reveal our level of selflessness by how we give our time!