#2 Dig Your Own Well. Codependence

#2 DIG YOUR OWN WELL? BEING CODEPENDENT By Wade Martin Hughes, Sr. Kyfingers@aol.com (Part #2) TEXT: Proverbs 5:15 Drink waters out of thine own cistern, and running waters out of thine own well.

ARISTOTLE’S GOLDEN MEAN. Aristotle taught a concept known as the Golden Mean. He taught life has two extremes. At one end of the balance is EXCESSIVENESS and at the other end was DEFICIENCY. Jesus taught this lesson as MODERATION in all things. (VIRTUE ETHICS)

Philippians 4:5 Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand.

Christianity is not a mere religion. Jesus is about relationships. We need a personal relationship with God and with other people. We are social beings. We function poorly as individuals, we work best as a team. We must make it as clear as you can to other people we are team mates. We pull together. The preacher is not your enemy. Law enforcement are not your enemy. Your teachers are not your enemy. Your spouse is not your enemy. Authority is not an enemy. All that we meet are on our side. We must learn to work with them and not against them. Jesus desires us to be gentle and cooperate together. Help them see that the Master is about to arrive. Jesus is coming will we be ready?

We need to understand that spiritually, mentally and physically we need to find the balance between INDEPENDENT ATTITUDES and CO-DEPENDENT. Dependent people learn to be a team and rely on each other. Codependent individuals tend to feel worthless unless they feel needed by others. Dependent and codependency are learned behaviors. God help us to be balanced…

CODEPENDENT: low self-value, characterized by excessive emotional or psychological reliance of others, one that feels they cannot function by themselves and needs and requires the support of others, a feeling of neediness, no joy or happiness by self. We seldom learn that WE CONTROL OUR PERSONAL MOODS.

CODEPENDENT can become an addiction. This trait often is birthed by personal failure and frustration that promotions an imbalance in relationships. This concept yields to a feeling of great loneliness in that a person can never feel complete without others.

Fear of what is ahead, self-doubt for what is behind, disappointments in others, bitterness from scars of the past, loneliness and where is that hand when I so needed it.

REMEMBER A MAN IN THE BOOK OF ACTS… HE IS CALLED SIMON MAGUS OR THE SORCERER HE LOVED WHAT HE SAW THE PREACHERS DOING… HE HAD A SURFACE RELIGION.

Acts 8:13 Then Simon himself believed also: and when he was baptized, he continued with Philip, and wondered, beholding the miracles and signs which were done.

Simon offers to BUY THE GIFTS AND THE HOLY SPIRIT. HE HAS NO PERSONAL EXPERIENCE. HE IS LOOKING FOR A CIRCUS. YOU PRAY FOR ME? WHY NOT PRAY FOR YOUR SELF? WHY NOT PRAY FOR YOURSELF?

Acts 8:24 Then answered Simon, and said, Pray ye to the Lord for me, that none of these things which ye have spoken come upon me.

DAVID REALIZES HE IS TOTALLY DEPENDENT ON GOD… THE LESSON OF ZIKLAG? Crying until you can’t cry no more... OR TRUSTING GOD… THAT IS THE OPTION.

1 Samuel 30:4 Then David and the people that were WITH HIM lifted up their voice and wept, until they had no more tears.

1 Samuel 30:6 And David was greatly distressed; for the people talked of stoning Him... How did David feel? Is crying enough?

David had been in battle, and even a good battle is bad ... and when David gets home, the enemy had quietly came into their home and did much damage and David loses all hope. Would his men help him?

Can David depend on his men? Naw, they are talking we shall kill David for this? Kill your God leader? Yes, the vision was lost? The hope was gone? The pain was fresh? I can imagine how David felt? Yet, I know, been there and done that...

Where are you God? Couldn’t You protect mine, while I was fighting for You? Sure, God could have! God could have whipped the enemy and let David lay under a shade tree laughing, but God was growing a man... growing a man takes more than emotional highs and lows, ups and downs...

David learned to depend on God. David had already whipped bear, lion and Goliath, that was easy, now comes the hard battle...

While everyone else was talking negative about everyone else, David had to spend time with God.

David learned a RARE SKILL that few ever learn. David had to learn --- how to encourage yourself ... HOW TO ENCOURAGE YOURSELF?

Well, that is everyone else’s job, if I am lonely God must send someone right NOW to correct my problem. NAW, God didn’t want to grow another jellyfish, God was growing His man with His plan.