Connect Four Series

Connect Four

How to Make a “Friend” Connection

11/05/03

I. Introduction

Ever wonder why geese fly in a V formation? Scientists at Cal Tech did. They put their computers and flight simulators to work and discovered the answer—flocks of geese form this pattern because it’s the easiest way to fly.

The formation acts aerodynamically like a single wing; that is, wind drag is distributed equally across all the birds. This in turn reduces drag on each individual bird. Twenty-five geese flying together in a V can travel seventy percent farther than one goose flying alone.

Because the lead goose actually situates itself slightly behind the perfect point position of the V, the geese that follow relieve some of its wind drag. It does not have to work harder than the others.

The benefit of the airflow pattern in the V (because it acts as a single flying wing) goes both ways. While the lead birds pull along those that are behind, the followers’ flight sends relief back up to the front.

From geese we can learn that, although we live in a society that promotes individualism and self-reliance, we function more effectively in community. Like the geese, we were created by God to work together, serve together, and encourage and support each other. When we cooperate and help each other to succeed, we not only accomplish much, but we do it with less stress and difficulty.

It’s not enough for us to know that we should work together and serve together and function in a community, it’s extremely important for us to know HOW! And so tonight I’m going to teach you how to make a connection, be it with someone at school, someone who comes to church, or someone you meet anywhere else.

II. Connections Don’t Just Happen

How many of ya’ll have played Connect Four before?

Well, if you’ve played this game, then you have some understanding of the fact that connections don’t just happen. In order for you to win at Connect Four, you must strategically drop your checkers in a certain place in order to get four in a row, or in order to make the connection.

Well, in the same way, connections with people don’t just happen. Someone has to make the first move in dropping a checker in the slot. So someone has to make the first move of introducing himself, and as the exchange between two people continue, a connection may or may not be formed. You may feel that you’re so close to making that connection, then the other person comes out of nowhere and completely blocks off the connection. And the parallels go on and on with people connections and checker connections. But in order to win in our relationships, we must become better at connecting.

And tonight I want to give you several keys to making a connection, and I believe that if you’ll follow these keys and provided the other person doesn’t block, you’ll be able to connect with anyone.

So, once we realize that connections don’t just happen, we can all step up and be the one to make the first move.

III. It’s Not “Hey, You!”

Chances are that we’ve all felt the awkwardness of forgetting someone’s name or someone else forgetting our name. You know, we walk in the door to youth group and we see that new person that we met last week.

“Hey, what’s up, Bill?”

“No, it’s Jennifer.”

“Oh, yeah, I knew that, I was yelling at Bill behind you.”

“There’s no one behind me.”

Or, we may try to play it safe and not let on that we have completely forgotten their name. You know, they come in and say, “Hey, Pastor Nate, how’s it going?” “Hey there, man, how you doing, bro?” And then they walk away and you’re thinking, “What was his name?”

You know, the best impression you can make on someone is remembering his name. I mean, to you, your name is the most important name you hear, and it makes a world of difference when somebody knows it.

Most people will readily admit that they’re terrible when it comes to remembering names. But we can’t make excuses like that and continue to expect to make a connection. We have to learn how to remember names.

So, here are some tips.

-If you have the time, make up a rhyme.

Let’s say you meet Jim at school tomorrow. Well, Jim is a tall, skinny fella with glasses. Once you meet Jim, you immediately begin making mental notes of his appearance and from then on, in your head, you’re calling him Slim Jim with glass Rims. So the next time you see that tall, skinny guy with glasses, you’ll immediately remember your rhyme and be able to call him by his name and not man, dude, homey or skinny guy.