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Summary: The modern view of marriage is the idea that you are going to find “the one” who is going to fulfill all your dreams. Nothing could be further from the truth.

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Dr. Bradford Reaves

Crossway Christian Fellowship

Hagerstown, MD

www.mycrossway.org

https://mycrossway.churchcenter.com/episodes/140695

According to Pew Research, the number of people who have never been married is rising. In 1960 the number of adults not married was 1 in 10. Today that number has doubled. Millennials are the highest in this category, with 4 in 10 not living with a family of their own. They are also more likely to test-drive marriage. Research shows that more millennials cohabitate before marriage than previous generations. Men are more likely to remain single and women are more likely to get married later in life because of careers.

We are living in a time when way too many people are single and the honor of marriage is nearly gone. We are watching the death of marriage for many reasons: because of divorce, because of homosexuality, and because of abortion. It is the death of the family because we live in a highly self-center society that is more focused on our own wants, goals, and needs than God’s plan for man and woman.

Some of this is because of the idealistic illusions portrayed in marriage. The modern view of marriage is the idea that you are going to find “the one” who is going to fulfill all your dreams. It is an idealistic romanticism that places your spouse on a pedestal as this perfect person and you just have to find that perfect person.

Nothing could be further from the truth. You can find your ideal mate. The one who looks, talks, and acts just the way you think is perfect. They may dress the way you want them and share your interests. You could marry that person and that person can feel just as giddy about you. But unless you walk in the Spirit, that marriage will have massive problems.

That’s where we are today. We’ve traveled through Ephesians looking at Paul’s letter giving us the understanding of how God predestined us to his Kingdom and bestowed on us every spiritual blessing in Christ, sealing us with the Holy Spirit (Ephesians 1:1-14). We look at how the Christian walk is vastly different than all others. And we saw the blessing of the Holy Spirit, filling us to move us into action and abundance in life. Now, sandwiched between godly living and spiritual warfare is Paul’s treatise on marriage and this is not by accident.

22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. 25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. (Ephesians 5:22–33)

1. The Biblical Distinctive

I think it is vital that we approach and understand marriage from the biblical context. Marriage was instituted and is upheld by God and God’s design. It is not a government institution. When the Supreme Court in 2015 redefined marriage, it stepped over its God-given authority. We talked about the origin of marriage last Fall in our creation series.

So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. 28 And God blessed them. And God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.” (Genesis 1:27–28)

Marriage really is designed by God for four things:

1. To Procreate Children - “Be fruitful and multiply” (Gen 1:28)

2. To eliminate solitude - “It is not good for man to be alone” (Gen 2:18)

3. To prevent sexual immorality - (1 Cor 7:2)

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