Children And Parents (Ephesians 6:1-4) Series

Today, we get to continue our Ephesians study by reading about what Paul has to say to one additional pairing in the typical Roman household. Paul addresses children, and parents.

The last two weeks, we focused on husbands and wives. We saw that when Paul addressed husbands and wives, he did so by addressing the weaker, less important member of a marriage according to normal Roman standards. He started with the wife, and then moved on to the husband. Paul actually had a lot more to say to husbands than wives, but he started with the wife. And this pattern, of starting with the weaker, less important Roman member of the household, continues this week. When you look at the translation, you'll see children are addressed in verse 1, and then parents in verse 4. Next week, we'll see that slaves are addressed in verse 5, and then masters in verse 9. Other famous philosophers like Aristotle also had their own version of these household rules, and they took a very different approach. They only address the men. So we should understand that Paul lists the members often thought of as weak and insignificant first, in order to give them a higher status. Wives, and children, and slaves, matter to God. They're able to make good decisions that please God, and how they live matters to God. Everyone around them may look down on them, and think they are lesser humans, or not worth much, but God sees them differently. God doesn't show the same type of partiality toward certain groups of people that we do (Mark 10:13-16). So when Paul addresses children first, it might seem like a little thing, but it means something. God values children, who tend to model better than anyone what it means to have faith in their Heavenly Father. My wife has a three old girl who she does daycare for, and this girl loves God. When she prays at mealtime, she wants to pray three times, talking to God. It's impossible not to smile, when you hear her talking to God. But even while you're smiling, take very seriously that God loves her. God loves her prayers. God takes her and her prayers seriously. Children matter to God.

So Paul turns from addressing husbands in chapter 5, to addressing children in Ephesians 6:1-3. Let's start with just the first line of verse 1:

(1) Children/kids, obey your parents in the Lord.

Let's start by asking, "Who does Paul refer to by the Greek word here for "children?" There's a general consensus here that there's an age-range here in mind. The edges are blurry, but when a child is old enough to hear Paul's words, and understand them, and do to them, they're old enough to be called "children." They've moved from being "babies," to "children." At the other end of the age range, as long as the child is under his/her parents' roof, they are probably still supposed to hear this command as addressed to them. So call it, age 2 or 3?, to young adults. Somewhere in there. This isn't the kind of thing I have any interest in debating, even though as a dad with young adults, I'm very aware of how relationships start to shift at a certain point. I parent a 19 year old differently than an 11 year old, and 19 year olds relate to me differently than an 11 year old.

At any rate, young people, do you all have a pretty good sense of whether or not you fit into this category? You know if Paul is talking to you, right? If this is you, Paul commands you to obey your parents. That's the first thing he says to you. Obey.

Now, probably, you sometimes feel as though your parents are constantly telling you what to do. To paraphrase/slightly misuse Ecclesiastes, your parents think there is a time to eat, and a time to be done eating. A time to do homework and chores, and a time to play. There's a time to get off your phone, and go outside and get some sunshine and fresh air. There's a time to get a job, a time to research what's a good job for when you leave the house, and what schooling or training you need to accomplish that. There's a time to go to bed, and a time to wake up. There's a time to practice piano, and a time to be done. If you goofed off while you practiced piano, there's a time to spend more time on the piano. Your parents also tell you, there's a time to apologize, and a time to forgive. There's a time to get serious about following Jesus. For some things, that time is always right now.

Now, we all know that some parents are more demanding, with higher expectations, than others. Kids, you can compare your parents, with your friends' parents, and see that in some ways, you get off easy, or that you have it hard. With some parents, it seems like it's always time for working, and studying, and chores, and practicing instruments. I had a friend in high school who had to vacuum his whole basement every day, and his mom checked that he had done so, every single day.