The Truth About Divorce Series

Dr. Bradford Reaves

Crossway Christian Fellowship

Hagerstown, MD

www.mycrossway.org

I realize that this morning, we are approaching a culturally sensitive topic of divorce. There are some here this morning that have endured the pain of a failed marriage. I grew up in a home without a dad because of divorce. So let me say from the outset that I recognize the sensitivity and complexity of the topic. I recognize and understand the pain associated with this. I realize there are circumstances behind a failed marriage that cannot be divided evenly. No one enters into a marriage with the anticipation of it dissolving.

Nevertheless, we are in the midst of Jesus’ teaching on the subject and so we’re going to approach the topic Scripturally and study Jesus’ words on our relationships with each other. The foundation of the topic of our relationships with each other was the topic of murder and the sanctity of life given to every person. Next, Jesus' foundational relationship in society was marriage, given as a holy institution. Now we examine the bulkhead against that institution.

Let me also say this. If there is any confusion on the subject, it is not because Bible is polysemantic on it. Quite the contrary. It is our society that has trivialized the covenant of marriage & sanctity of sexuality. The confusion on the topic comes when you try to justify the sinfulness of the world with the standard of God. From the very beginning, God has placed a high standard on the marital union as one of the foundational tenants of our relationships and we should do the same.

Now, for those of you here this morning who were divorced in a previous marriage, I want to tell you that God is a God of mercy. He’s a God of second chances. There is redemption and healing in His name. The Bible is clear that divorce is a result of man’s sinfulness. With that, we can be sure that the sin, whatever it was that contributed to your situation, is covered under the Cross of Christ. We all can grow from the words of Jesus here today and rest confidently in the mercies of God for our future.

“Now it was said, ‘WHOEVER SENDS HIS WIFE AWAY, LET HIM GIVE HER A CERTIFICATE OF DIVORCE’; 32 but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery. (Matthew 5:31–32)

The Worldly Standard

The opening words of Jesus' teaching on the topic are similar to the other topics of murder and adultery. “You have heard it said” (Matthew 5:31). It is Jesus’ way of saying, ‘Man’s standards of God’s law don’t reach the bar.’ The teaching Jesus is referring to is Deuteronomy 24:1.

?“If a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out from his house, (Deuteronomy 24:1)

Based on this verse, the Jewish people justified divorce on any grounds. The operant words were “he has found some indecency in her.” Some rabbis took it as any cause of complaint a husband had against his wife, including burning the dinner (France). What was meant to refer to sexual infidelity, was diminished to an instrument of cruelty against a woman. In most instances, only the man could issue a certificate of divorce against his wife, resulting in unimaginable ruin and impoverishment. However just as difficult was the burden and negative consequences left upon the family and society, especially on the children.

According to Dave Schultheis who is the author of the 2002 Children of Divorce Protection Act- A stable, two-parent home has no equal in terms of its benefits to children. Over 80 percent of inmates in Colorado prisons come from homes where one or both parents were not around. Risks of teenage pregnancy, alcohol and drug abuse, incarceration, poor performance in school, and many other indicators are multiples greater for children of divorce than for children of two-parent homes. The data are undeniable. Divorce has a life-long effect on children that, for many, is never overcome. (Sermon Central: Jeffery Anselmi).

Jesus sets the liberal view on divorce by the Pharisees straight. Divorce violates the biblical standard of marriage. This will not be the only time Jesus must address the issue with the Jewish leaders and why Moses included the provision of divorce in the Law. It was not because God was agreeable to the issue. Once again in Matthew 19, Jesus provides a clear stance on the issue:

Now it happened that when Jesus had finished these words, He departed from Galilee and came into the region of Judea beyond the Jordan; 2 and large crowds followed Him, and He healed them there. 3 And some Pharisees came to Jesus, testing Him and saying, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason at all?” 4 And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE, 5 and said, ‘FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH’? 6 “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” 7 They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to GIVE HER A CERTIFICATE OF DIVORCE AND SEND her AWAY?” 8 He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning, it has not been this way. 9 “And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.” (Matthew 19:1–9 LSB)