The Virtuous Mother Series

I surf the radio channels when I’m on a long drive, and over the past few years I’ve noticed there are a lot of “mama songs.” But, I can’t really recall hearing any “daddy songs” on the radio. You see, Mamas are special. Think about it. When you look back at your life and consider who was really involved on a personal level, it was probably mama. Mama is also usually the one who sticks around and raises the children when daddy takes off. Mothers have always been special. That’s why we sing about them; and it’s also the reason why we celebrate Mother’s Day.

Now, I implied that there are some bad men out there; but for the good men, who are the soon-to-be husbands and fathers, there’s some advice on what to look for in a decent woman; specifically a virtuous woman. Proverbs 31, which we’re going to be looking at, contains not just advice on the kind of woman that a man should look for; but it’s also an account of the behavior that a godly mother should aspire to in her life. I’ve entitled our message “The Virtuous Mother,” and we’re going to be looking at this account of the virtuous wife or virtuous woman verse by verse, beginning with verse 10.

Verse 10: Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies.

The King James Version asks, “Who can find a virtuous woman?” Commentator Matthew Henry says that this description here of the virtuous woman consists of twenty-two verses, each beginning with a letter of the Hebrew alphabet. He proposes that the passage may have been arranged this way for ease, as it was possibly taught and repeated among Jewish women as a learning aid, as they committed these traits of the virtuous woman to memory (Henry).(1) Each verse is an acrostic, beginning with a consecutive letter of the Hebrew alphabet. For example, if it were written in English, Proverbs 31:10 would be letter A, Proverbs 31:11 would be letter B, and so forth to the end of the chapter (Clarke).(2) You might call this passage “the ABCs of a godly woman.”

This woman’s general character is that she is a virtuous woman – a woman of power and strength (Clarke). She is invaluable; her price is far above rubies – no quantity of precious stones can be equal to her worth (Clarke). Pope John Paul II said that “although the Bible does give examples of women who led others astray, the predominant image is one of strong individuals who work with and for God,”(3) and no doubt having this verse from Proverbs in mind, the Pope stated, “The ideal woman is a precious treasure.” In finding this precious treasure, and in making this “ideal woman” his wife, the truly blessed husband has found the person who will also become the “ideal mother” of his children. So, let’s see what the rest of this passage has to say about the ideal woman – the virtuous woman.

Verse 11: The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain.

The virtuous woman is an unspotted wife (Clarke). “The heart of her husband safely trusts her,” having peace of mind in knowing he has no need to worry about infidelity. He knows the marriage bed will remain undefiled. How many of us have that kind of confidence in our own spouse? The other thing we read here is that she will make sure that “he – and her children, I might add – will have no lack of gain.” The virtuous woman will make sure that proper provision is made for the household (Clarke). She will always be attentive to where money or supplies might soon be lacking; and when applied today, this could mean she will be ready to run to the grocery store at a moment’s notice.

Verse 12: She does him good and not evil all the days of her life.

Commentator Adam Clarke says, “She has her husband’s happiness in view constantly” (Clarke). How many men can say of their wife that she considers their happiness? Not too long ago my wife told me, “What I want more than anything is for you to be happy and to see your dreams fulfilled.” And I said, “That’s not right! You have dreams too!” But I won’t forget what she said. It was deeply humbling, and I knew she meant it. Men, if your wife ever says something like that, then you know you’ve got a good one!

Verse 13: She seeks wool and flax, and willingly works with her hands.

Here, we read that she worked with her hands. In that time women, even of the highest ranks, among the Greeks, Romans, and Israelites, worked with their hands at every kind of occupation necessary for the support of the family (Clarke). There are so many opinions today concerning women and work. Some people believe that a woman’s place is in the home, working as a homemaker. Others look down on homemakers and feel that a truly strong woman should be out in the public workforce. But, whether at home or in the workforce, hard work is necessary to support a family; and the virtuous woman is one who works hard at whatever job is set before her.