Healing Heart Wounds - Part 2 Series

2 Corinthians 1:3-11

DEFINITIONS: (WEBSTER’S)

GRIEF - The pain of mind produced by loss, misfortune, injury or evils of any kind; sorrow; regret. We experience grief when we lose a friend, when we incur loss, when we consider ourselves injured, and by sympathy, we feel grief at the misfortunes of others.

SOR’ROW - The uneasiness or pain of mind which is produced by the loss of any good or of frustrated hopes of good, or expected loss of happiness; to grieve; to be sad.

INTRODUCTION

• Tell Richie’s Story

• Grief and the “Spirit of Grief” are not the same. - Explain

• Grief helps you, the “Spirit of Grief” incapacitates you.

• Preach a quick exposition of the text

• Loss brings grief. Some losses that cause grief are (the death of a loved one, loss of a job or standard of living, loss of health, loss of a limb, divorce, abandonment by family, betrayal, desertion, bankruptcy, foreclosure and/or repossessions, etc)

I. BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF GRIEF

A. Joseph grieved when his father died. Genesis 50:1-3

1. Joseph fell on his father’s face and kissed him.

2. They spent 40 days in the embalming process.

3. Joseph and the Egyptians mourned Jacob for a total of 70 days.

B. Jesus grieved.

1. Jesus grieved over His friend Lazarus in the shortest verse of the Bible. John 11:35 says, “Jesus wept.”

2. Jesus wept over Jerusalem - Luke 13:34 - O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, which killest the prophets, and stonest them that are sent unto thee; how often would I have gathered thy children together, as a hen doth gather her brood under her wings, and ye would not!

II. 5 STAGES OF GRIEF

• There can be more than five stages of grief and they do not all function chronologically.

• The Elisabeth Kübler-Ross model, along with CS Lewis’s musings on these five stages of grief.

A. Denial: Most of the time a persons first reaction to a loss is a refusal to believe that what has happened really happened. This is natural. I think God designed us this way to buffer the pain a little so we can begin to recover. Some go into momentary shock!

1. CS Lewis - No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.

2. Proverbs 17:17 - “A friend loves at all times…” - During the denial phase we can physically feel the reality of this passage.

B. Anger: Anger is a natural, emotional reaction for someone dealing with loss. Everyone processes differently. God’s Word gives us instruction concerning anger.

1. CS Lewis describes - Go to Him when your need is desperate, when all other help is vain, and what do you find? A door slammed in your face, and a sound of bolting and double bolting on the inside. After that, silence.

2. Ephesians 4:26 - “Be angry and sin not…” (God’s Word doesn’t tell us to not be angry… It says don’t sin when we are angry.)

C. Bargaining: There is a natural tendency for us to try and bargain with God. We know better but we do it anyway. There are just some things that happen in life that we don’t have the answer for. We need to resist the temptation to blame God and trust Him instead. Trusting Him also means trusting the process…

1. CS Lewis - I have gradually been coming to feel that the door is no longer shut and bolted. Was it my own frantic need that slammed it in my face? The time when there is nothing at all in your soul except a cry for help may be just the time when God can’t give it: you are like the drowning man who can’t be helped because he clutches and grabs. Perhaps your own reiterated cries deafen you to the voice you hoped to hear.

2. 1 Peter 5:6-7 Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time: 7 Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.

D. Depression: Depression and feelings of despair are very real. When the reality of the loss sets in, many times depression will follow. There will be a numbness. Simple tasks will seem large. You’ll be to exhausted to fight because fighting takes to much energy and who cares anyway? You will be tempted to withdraw because (no one will understand). Its important to remember… Don’t try to go it alone!

1. CS Lewis - Not that I am (I think) in much danger of ceasing to believe in God. The real danger is of coming to believe such dreadful things about Him. The conclusion I dread is not ‘So there’s no God after all,’ but ‘So this is what God’s really like.

2. Hebrews 4:16 Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.