Forgiving Those Who Hurt You Series

A. We live in a WORLD where it’s so easy to become CALLUSED and INDIFFERENT.

1. We are bombarded daily with news of TRAGEDIES, VIOLENT ACTS, and SUFFERING PEOPLE.

COMMENT:

Living SANELY in such a WORLD often necessitates developing a certain amount of THICK SKIN. Unfortunately, THICK SKIN and a HARD HEART are often confused with one another. And as a result, you can find HARD, UNFORGIVING people everywhere in our SOCIETY. Sadly, their HARDNESS has made them CYNICAL and BITTER.

2. The TRUTH of the MATTER is, however, there are some SITUATIONS that cannot be FIXED.

COMMENT:

You cannot UNSAY a DEMEANING remark. You cannot UNDO the THRASHING that you INFLICTED on the KID that you BULLIED back in SCHOOL. You cannot TAKE BACK the ADULTEROUS RELATIONSHIP with your NEIGHBOR. You cannot make a CHILD walk again

that you PARALYZED while DRIVING under the INFLUENCE.

And we can say “I AM SORRY” until our face turns blue, but that still doesn’t EASE the HURT, UNDO the DEED, or REPAIR the TURMOIL that we caused.

B. This is when those of us who have been DEEPLY HURT by another must make a DECISION.

1. We either decide to FORGIVE the person who committed the OFFENSE against us or HARBOR

BITTERNESS toward the person.

a. How have you been HURT by SOMEONE?

ILLUSTRATION:

It may be that in your MARRIAGE your SPOUSE has WOUNDED you deeply. He or she may have taken ADVANTAGE of you in some way, or has been UNFAITHFUL to you, or PERHAPS has HURT you deeply by other things SAID or DONE against you that you’re having DIFFICULTY

FORGIVING.

Some of you carry the WOUNDS of ABUSIVE parents—PARENTS who through VERBAL or EMOTIONAL or maybe even PHYSICAL abuse, inflicted WOUNDS that to this day you carry around, ADVERSELY affecting all your RELATIONSHIPS. Perhaps even to this day you’re still TRYING to live up to their EXPECTATIONS, striving to PLEASE them, hoping that one day you’ll

be the FAVORED child that you never could be GROWING UP.

Maybe you were HURT by a PASTOR who BETRAYED a CONFIDENCE. A so-called FRIEND might have BERATED you on SOCIAL MEDIA. A CO-WORKER threw you under the BUS that got you FIRED.

b. Deep WOUNDS come from many places. We have all been HURT by somebody.

2. And although it is not EASY, we are commanded to FORGIVE.

a. Ephesians 4:32 (READ and COMMENT)

b. Colossians 3:13 (READ and COMMENT)

c. Matthew 6:14-15 (READ and COMMENT)

COMMENT:

God takes FORGIVENESS seriously, and so should we. Our own forgiveness depends on it.

MESSAGE:

COMMENT:

Philemon is the shortest book that the Apostle Paul wrote. This short letter, along with Philippians, Ephesians and Colossians are known as the Prison Letters, written while Paul was in

CHAINS under house-arrest in Rome.

It is a personal LETTER written to a man named Philemon because he had been WRONGED by his servant named Onesimus whom had, it is widely believed, STOLEN MONEY from him and then RAN AWAY to Rome.

I. THE URGING OF FORGIVENESS- Philemon (READ)

A. Although the word “FORGIVE” is not used even once in this letter, this little book is all about finding

FREEDOM THROUGH FORGIVENESS.

1. Paul introduced himself in this letter as a “prisoner of Christ Jesus…”- v. 1.

a. This is during the same period he wrote the book of Philippians, that we had been studying for

the past 6-weeks.

b. Paul is a PRISONER of Rome under house-arrest, chained to two Roman guards around the

clock. Nothing is different.

c. He is able to have visitors, so Timothy, among others, is or has been with him at this time. He mentions Timothy because he, too, is known by Philemon.

2. We also learn in v. 1 that “Philemon is a dear friend and fellow worker” of Paul’s.

a. He lived in the small town of Colossae, with a population of about 25-30,000 people.

b. “The church of Colossae met in his house”- v. 2.

COMMENT:

Since Paul also sends greeting to the CHURCH, we assume that even though this LETTER is personally addressed to Philemon, the apostle wanted it READ to the church. This letter

contained lessons about acceptance and forgiveness that he wanted the entire church to HEAR

c. We learn in v. 19 that “Paul personally led Philemon to the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ.”

COMMENT:

No doubt there was a special bond between Philemon and Paul forged not only by their FRIENDSHIP, but by the fact that Philemon was INDEBTED to Paul for SHARING with him the

GOOD NEWS of Christ.

d. Obviously, Philemon was a man of some MEANS.

-He had a HOME large enough for the Colossian church to meet. (Not a large church!)

-He was also a SLAVE-OWNER. (Not everyone could afford a slave.)