Bad Decisions #1 Series

What to eat, what to wear, who to respond to first, what to prioritize at work — each of us makes hundreds, if not thousands, of decisions each day.

Some of these choices have larger consequences than others. For starters, who we choose to surround ourselves with, where we live, who we worship, what we fear, what we regret doing or not doing. All of which can have a huge impact on our health and happiness.

Nobody is perfect. Just think of that email/text/phone call/letter you wish you’d never sent. Seriously, we all make bad choices. Though there’s no surefire way to never make a mistake, but paying attention to signs that culminate in our bad decisions can help us change course before it’s too late.

As I started to review my life, there are a number of bad decisions I still wince about. However, there is one that stands out. It happened over twenty years ago. The business I started and was growing needed a showroom and more warehouse space. A friend offered a few thousand feet within his larger warehouse but told me the buildout was my responsibility. I thought no problem, I got a guy. After I shared my vision with my guy, he asked if we were getting drawings and permits because that would delay the project and he had another job. I didn’t think of the consequences so I said let’s go ahead. Afterall, there is no way the inspector would come by. A little more than ¾ of the way through a city fire inspector wandered through. He found a lot of issues and in the end, I had to rip it all out. It was a costly mistake that I will never forget. It’s also a reminder that when I am in a hurry, I need to stop, wait and discuss the best alternatives with my wife and my mentor.

The bible is filled with people who have ventured down roads that are not wise by any stretch of the imagination. The first one that jumps to mind is the whole story of Abraham, Sarah and Hagar from the book of Genesis.

Sarah was the wife of Abraham. Hagar was the servant of Sarah. God had promised Abraham many descendants, but, ten years after the promise, Sarah was still unable to have children, and they were both on the verge of becoming too old to have children at all. Sarah chose to give her servant Hagar to Abraham, in accordance with the custom of the day, so that Sarah could have a child through her (Genesis 16:2).

Hagar conceived, and began to despise her mistress. Sarah in turn began to deal harshly with her, so Hagar left. However, the angel of the Lord met in the wilderness, commanding her to return to Abraham and Sarah. The angel also offered a promise from God to Hagar: “I will surely multiply your offspring so that they cannot be numbered for multitude” (Genesis 16:10). The angel would go on to predict Ishmael's character (Genesis 16:11–12) and Hagar would return. It would be fourteen more years before Sarah would give birth to Isaac at the ripe old age of 90.

After a couple more years, when Sarah no longer needed Hagar. Abraham sent Hagar and Ishmael away. It’s always fascinating that when we read this story in a bible study, how many people (women and men) know this plan wasn’t a good idea. If they were about to go swimming on a beach, the red flag warning from the life guard about swimming conditions would be out. Everyone in this baby triangle had to see the red flags of this baby mama drama. This wasn’t going to turn out well.

The story’s lesson for us is simple. When we fail to have faith and trust in the promises of God and take matters into our own hands, there is pain for all involved. Does it sound familiar? There were six red flags in this story we need to be aware of if we want to make better decisions. Let’s go to the text in Genesis 16: 2-6

2 so she said to Abram, “The Lord has kept me from having children. 🏴

Red flag #1 happens as a result of an unmet expectation

Go, sleep with my slave 🏴🏴

Red flag #2 comes to those who rush into a decision

perhaps I can build a family through her.” 🏴🏴🏴

Red flag #3 comes when you assume taking any action will CORRECT a problem. However, when we assume, we have not asked enough questions and do not have enough answers to proceed. Also, in this case assuming anything might mean you're tired and as such not capable of sound decision making. Anyone over 50 will tell you, the basic tasks of life get harder and you tire faster. Imagine being 90, living in a tent and trying to conceive with an older partner.