Contributed by Lynn Malone on May 18, 2005
based on 12 ratings
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A pastor in a small church was greatly annoyed by one of his elderly members who fell asleep during his sermons every Sunday. After the service one day, the pastor said to the old man’s grandson who always sat with his grandfather, “If you can keep the old man awake, I’ll pay you a dollar a week.”
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Methodist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jan 27, 2006
based on 3 ratings
| 7,612 views
Church Tech: 9 out of 10 Protestant pastors have Internet access, and about half of all Protestant churches maintain a church Web site, according to a recent Ellison Research study. While 90% of ministers are online, only a third of those use a content filter on their church office computer. 88%
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Contributed by Jim Kilson on Mar 3, 2006
based on 3 ratings
| 4,638 views
Suffering the Rats: A missionary was assigned to some remote islands in the Pacific. After three months, he sent a fax to mission headquarters: "I’m being plagued by rats. What shall I do?" Soon a crate arrived, filled with rattraps. However, hardly a month later the missionary sent a second fax
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 17, 2006
based on 1 rating
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In Discipleship Journal, Don McCullough wrote: "John Killinger tells about the manager of a minor league baseball team who was so disgusted with his center fielder’s performance that he ordered him to the dugout and assumed the position himself. The first ball that came into center field took a bad
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 26, 2007
Oscar Cervantes is a dramatic example of Christ’s power to transform lives. As a child, Oscar began to get into trouble. Then as he got older, he was jailed 17 times for brutal crimes. Prison psychiatrists said he was beyond help. But they were wrong! During a brief interval of freedom, Oscar met
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 1 rating
| 2,599 views
I am sure all of us had our fair share of being disrupted, disparaged or discouraged by rude behavior such as insults, curses, or gossip.
Three pastors went to the pastor’s convention and were all sharing one room. The first pastor said, “Let’s confess our secret vices one to another. I’ll start
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 2 ratings
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Martin Luther had a dream where he was being attacked by the devil. The devil unrolled a long scroll containing a list of Luther’s sins, and held it before him. On reaching the end of the scroll Luther asked the devil, “Is that all?” The devil said, “No,” and a second scroll was placed in front of
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 2 ratings
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Talking is easy, isn’t it? Some people have no problems with talking to you about almost any subject you can think of. They can ramble on and on and say thousands of words, and not really say anything of importance.
Three boys were bragging to one another about their fathers. One of them said, “My
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Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Sep 24, 2007
based on 1 rating
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A “lame duck” President met with his successor in the Oval Office. Near the end of the orientation, he presented the incoming leader three numbered envelopes, with specific instructions to open them, in order, when great difficulties arose.
After the new President completed his “honeymoon” period
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Independent/Bible
Contributed by Lonnie Erwin on Oct 5, 2007
based on 3 ratings
| 1,561 views
Illustration: A young camel asked his mother “mother why do we have very large feet with three large toes?’ The mother camel answered “in order to walk on the sands of the desert!” The young camel again asked his mother “mother why do we have very long legs?” again the mother camel replied in
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Denomination:
Baptist
CONSISTENT LIFE
I recently heard of four scholars who were arguing over Bible translations. One said he preferred the King James Version because of its beautiful, eloquent old English. Another said he preferred the American Standard Bible for its literalism, the way it moves the reader from
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Apr 21, 2008
based on 1 rating
| 1,671 views
"According to the Rabbis, the Books of Numbers and Deuteronomy are complementary to each other (comp. Tithe, Biblical Data); consequently there can be no contradiction between them. Thus there were three kinds of tithes: (1) that given to the Levites as stated in Num. xviii. 21 et seq., and termed
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Independent/Bible
Contributed by Rick Bezanson on Jul 31, 2008
There were six people trapped in a dark, cold cave. They each had a stick of wood. The fire in the middle of the cave was starting to go out. The first woman refused to put her wood in the fire because there was someone she didn’t like in the circle. The next man held onto his stick of wood
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Lutheran
Contributed by Jesse Bennett on Oct 4, 2008
In 1786, Thomas Jefferson and John Adams went to negotiate with Tripoli’s envoy to London, Ambassador Sidi Haji Abdrahaman or (Sidi Haji Abdul Rahman Adja). Upon inquiring "concerning the ground of the pretensions to make war upon nations who had done them no injury", the ambassador replied:
"It
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Baptist
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