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In Sermon Illustrations: "Songs For The Nursery"

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  • Corny Valentine's Puns

    Contributed by Dr. Larry Petton on Jan 4, 2021
     | 2,453 views

    Q: What did the cucumber say to the pickle on Valentine's Day?" A: "You mean a great DILL to me." Q: What Valentine card did the light bulb say to the other light bulb? A: I love you a WATT! Q: What is a ram's favorite song on February 14th? A: I only have ...read more

  • Dieting An Old Tradition

    Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Mar 9, 2022
     | 1,118 views

    How long have Americans been obsessed with dieting? I cannot answer that question, but I do have a CD of Eddie Cantor singing, “My Wife is On A Diet” from 1929. It features lyrics like, “No more gravy and potatoes, only lettuce and tomatoes! Where are the pies I adore?” And then there is my 1932 ...read more

  • Jingle Bells  PRO

    Contributed by Peter Loughman on Dec 23, 2006
    based on 10 ratings
     | 3,091 views

    JINGLE BELLS The two of them were best friends in seminary, studying together, helping each other financially when one or the other got in a pinch, they stood by each other through thick and thin. When they graduated from seminary both coincidentally received a church call within the same state: ...read more

  • Do We Know The Pessimist's Creed?

    Contributed by Wade Martin Hughes, Sr on Feb 9, 2007
    based on 1 rating
     | 3,053 views

    DO WE KNOW THE PESSIMIST’S CREED? THINK, IF THE PESSIMIST HAD A CREED WHAT WOULD IT BE? ALL BUT ME AND THEE! THE PESSIMIST CREED! By Wade Martin Hughes, Sr. Why rejoice in sunshine? It will just turn to dark clouds and much rain! Besides that, the sunshine can hurt your eyes, More than that it ...read more

  • On Trial For Sharing The Gospel  PRO

    Contributed by Roger Nelmes on Jan 30, 2008
    based on 4 ratings
     | 4,014 views

    On Trial for Sharing the Gospel 17 and 18 years old, Pakistan, 1997 (p27-28) Anila met Perveen at school. As their friendship grew, Anila gave Perveen a Bible and taught her Christian songs. Perveen quickly learned Christian songs and began to teach them to her younger sister when her parents ...read more

  • Dearest Jesus, Holy Child  PRO

    Contributed by David Dewitt on Dec 4, 2001
    based on 13 ratings
     | 3,777 views

    DEAREST JESUS, HOLY CHILD Ah, dearest Jesus, holy Child, Make thee a bed, soft, undefiled, Within my heart, that it may be A quiet chamber kept for Thee. My heart for very joy doth leap, My lips no more can silence keep, I too must sing, with joyful tongue, That sweetest ancient cradle ...read more

  • My Wife And I And Our Oldest And Youngest ...  PRO

    Contributed by Johann Neethling on Aug 27, 2003
    based on 2 ratings
     | 2,218 views

    My wife and I and our oldest and youngest daughters are still "Resident Aliens" – just so as not to scare anyone, we had our head antenna and body scales surgically removed so as to look like you all • We still carry our Resident Alien cards. • I remind you, my dear friends – as Christians – you ...read more

  • Max Lucado Tells A Story In A Book Called "It's ...  PRO

    Contributed by Jeff Simms on Aug 2, 2004
    based on 7 ratings
     | 10,203 views

    Max Lucado tells a story in a book called “It’s Not About Me” about a friend of his who had cancer. Some well intentioned Christians had told him ‘If you have faith, then you will be healed”. But, no healing came, only a crisis in faith in that man’s life. Max suggested another answer to him, ...read more

  • Many Do Not Recognize The Fact As They Ought, ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 8, 2006
     | 1,748 views

    "Many do not recognize the fact as they ought, that Satan has got men fast asleep in sin and that it is his great device to keep them so. He does not care what we do if he can do that. We may sing songs about the sweet by and by, preach sermons and say prayers until doomsday, and he will never ...read more

  • True Riches  PRO

    Contributed by Asiri Perera on Sep 6, 2006
    based on 4 ratings
     | 4,317 views

    True Riches A tax officer asked an old man to declare his wealth. The Old man declared his riches like this: o A mansion in heaven o Everlasting life o Peace that passes all understanding o Joy unspeakable o Devine love that never fails o A crown of life o A faithful wife o Healthy, Happy & ...read more

  • Three Boys In The School Yard Were Bragging About ...  PRO

    Contributed by Dale Johnsen on Dec 28, 2000
    based on 125 ratings
     | 12,753 views

    Three boys in the school yard were bragging about who had the better father. The first boy says, "My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, and they give him $100." The second boy says, "That’s nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a ...read more

  • Jack Hayford And His Wife Anna Were Vacationing ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
    based on 1 rating
     | 3,727 views

    Jack Hayford and his wife Anna were vacationing in Britain during the 25th anniversary of the coronation of Queen Elizabeth II. While there the Hayfords saw constant reminders of royalty. That, along with visits to several castles, caused Hayford to sense what it might be like to be "raised as a ...read more

  • Joy On The Road

    Contributed by Charles Wallis on Sep 25, 2008
     | 5,939 views

    Joy on the Road Honda made a "Musical Road" for a commercial in Lancaster, CA, that played the William Tell Overture when you drove on it. At first, it wasn't too exciting. But as you picked up speed, you could actually hear a song played by the tires hitting the grooves in the road at just the ...read more

  • But In God's Scheme Of Things, A Person's A ...

    Contributed by Mark Eberly on Dec 3, 2008
     | 2,461 views

    But in God's scheme of things, a person's a person no matter how small. In fact in God's scheme, the least are the most important. The poor and marginalized and abuse and downtrodden are given God's favor over the important, or wealthy, or famous. Chris Tomlin wrote a worship song that I love ...read more

  • When We Try To Figure Everything Out Instead Of ...

    Contributed by Charles Wallis on Feb 8, 2009
     | 1,449 views

    When we try to figure everything out instead of trusting God, we get cynical and miss out on miracles. "The Logical Song" by Supertramp: "When I was young, it seemed that life was so wonderful, a miracle, oh it was beautiful, magical. And all the birds in the trees, well they’d be singing so ...read more

  • You Know You're Getting Old When...

    Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Aug 15, 2011
     | 1,654 views

    YOU KNOW YOU'RE GETTING OLD WHEN... • You hear your favorite song on an elevator. • You watch the Weather Channel. • You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore. • You try to straighten out the wrinkles in your socks and discover you aren't wearing any. • When you say something to your ...read more

  • Sin Separates. Sin Divides. Sin Brings Death To ...  PRO

    Contributed by Clark Tanner on Sep 23, 2004
    based on 3 ratings
     | 9,778 views

    Sin separates. Sin divides. Sin brings death to relationships and destroys fellowship. God unites. God brings oneness and unity. On the day of Pentecost, God reversed the Babel process, and with one language from heaven, He demonstrated that all in Him will be sharers of one divine ...read more

  • God Is

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 28, 2008
     | 6,280 views

    GOD IS Ann Kimball had a marvelous way of talking about Jesus. She was the dean of women at Eastern Nazarene College in Boston, and she would speak all over the country. She was flying from Boston to San Francisco to speak, and she said she was just so tired from the week that she sat down in her ...read more

  • Church Asks Non-Participants To Leave

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Mar 21, 2011
     | 3,926 views

    CHURCH ASKS NON-PARTICIPANTS TO LEAVE Just a few years ago, Larknews.com carried the following fictional piece of satire on its website. In the form of a news release, it reported: Julie and Bob Clark were stunned to receive a letter from their church in July asking them to "participate in the ...read more

  • United We Stand

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 16, 2014
     | 6,239 views

    Let me read one of Aesop’s Greek fables; In the forest, there lived four oxen. They were very good friends and always went together to graze in the fields. However, every time they went, a hungry lion tried to attack them. The lion longed for their meat. But they withstood his attack by fighting ...read more