In Sermon Illustrations: "Respect Her"

Wasteful Americans

Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 3, 2009

"WASTEFUL" AMERICANS A woman fell out of a second-floor window and landed in a slow-moving garbage truck. Half-buried in the litter, she tried without success to get the truck-driver’s attention. A foreign diplomat standing on the sidewalk saw her and quipped, "Another example of how wasteful ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 103:1-5

Tags: Culture

According To The Jewish Encyclopedia,

Contributed by Ed Vasicek on May 11, 2010

According to the Jewish Encyclopedia, "It is… in the Book of Proverbs that the high place which the mother occupied in the Hebrew's estimation is specially indicated. Her teachings are constantly enjoined as being of equal weight with those of the father. The first verse after the introduction to ...read more

Tags: Mother's Day

Denomination: Independent/Bible

Friendly ...

Contributed by Donnie Martin on Jun 12, 2010

Friendly Employees Mamie Adams always went to a branch post office in her town because the postal employees there were friendly. She went there to buy stamps just before Christmas one year and the lines were particularly long. Someone pointed out that there was no need to wait on line because ...read more

Tags: Kindness

Denomination: Baptist

Garbage In Your Salad

Contributed by Derrick Tuper on Jul 12, 2010

GARBAGE IN YOUR SALAD There was a mother peeling vegetables for a salad when her daughter, home from college, casually mentioned she was going to a questionable movie that evening. The mother suddenly picked up a handful of garbage and threw it in the salad. "Mother!" said the shocked girl. "Why ...read more

Tags: Discipleship

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

Missing Husband

Contributed by Sermon Central on May 8, 2012

MISSING HUSBAND A woman went to the police station to report her husband as missing. She described him as "29 years old, six foot three, athletic, and handsome." The sergeant shook his head. "Wait a minute, lady. I know your husband. He’s 50, short, and overweight." The woman said, ...read more

Scripture: Colossians 3:19

Tags: Marriage Struggle

Beautiful And Stupid At The Same Time  PRO

Contributed by Garris Hudson on Feb 2, 2014

BEAUTIFUL AND STUPID AT THE SAME TIME A husband and wife were having an argument. Finally, out of sheer frustration, the husband blurted out, "Honey, I don’t know why God made you so beautiful...and, yet, so stupid, at the same time!" The woman stared at her husband and said, ...read more

Scripture: Ephesians 5:18-25

Tags: Marriage, Husband, Wife

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

Love Or Achievement

Contributed by Dr. Fred W. Penney on Dec 9, 2019

I once heard a woman give a remarkable account of achievement. An early feminist, she gained renown in the male-dominated field of endocrinology. She brushes shoulders with Nobel laureates and world leaders, and has lived as full and rich a life as any I have known. At the end of her story she ...read more

Scripture: John 3:16, 1 John 4:7-8

Tags: Love, Success, Meaning Of Life

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

Stubborn

Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Sep 19, 2021

.A customer walked into my clothing shop and asked to see the pants that were advertised in the paper that day. “We don’t have an ad in the paper today,” I told her. She insisted I was wrong, so I got a copy of the paper, and we went through it, eventually landing on an ad for pants from another ...read more

Scripture: Romans 12:3

Tags: Ego, Stubborn, Admit, Nerve, Self Centered, Truth, Wrong, Pride, Confess, Arrogance  (view more)  (view less)

Denomination: Independent/Bible

Gift Of Complaining?

Contributed by Wade Martin Hughes, Sr on Sep 3, 2025

DO WE COMPLAIN TOO MUCH? Did you hear about the lady that prayed and asked God to bless her garden? Then she complained about having to hoe out the weeds. Then she complained about how hot it was? Then she complained about having to pick the tomatoes and the beans? Then she complained she had to ...read more

Scripture: Galatians 6:2, 1 Timothy 6:9-10

Tags: Thanks, Complaining

Denomination: Assembly Of God

There’s Something About A Lazy Summer Afternoon

Contributed by James Snyder on Jun 13, 2020

The past week was an unusually quiet week around the parsonage. It enabled me to do something that I have wanted to do all summer long. Nothing. I am not bragging or anything, but I can do nothing right up there with the best of them. The week, as all weeks do, started on Monday. For me, there is ...read more

Scripture: Mark 6:31

Tags: Humor, Relationship

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

The Alleged Warrant For My Arrest

Contributed by James Snyder on Oct 24, 2020

This past week was one of the best weeks I've had in a long time. I got everything completed, as well as some overdue projects. There’s no feeling quite like the feeling of having accomplished your goals for the week. As far as I was concerned, this called for an Apple fritter celebration. ...read more

Scripture: 1 John 4:18

Tags: Fear, Humor

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

It Was A Shoofly Pie Moment

Contributed by James Snyder on Dec 5, 2020

During holiday seasons, I enjoy indulging in special food. My favorite during this time of year is the Shoofly Pie. Nothing hits the spot quite like this. Although the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage restricts this kind of culinary activity during the rest of the year, I tried to get a pass ...read more

Scripture: 2 Corinthians 6:17

Tags: Politician, Holiday, Shoofly

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Who Doesn’t Like A Girl Scout Cookie?

Contributed by James Snyder on May 8, 2021

This week the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage made a little slip. To her, it was a little slip, but to me, it was a big mistake. It is not always that she makes mistakes that I can profit on. I don't make this public, especially within her earshot, but there are times that she makes a ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 37:4

Tags: Diet, Girl Scouts

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Hallelujah… She’s Baaaaack

Contributed by James Snyder on Sep 4, 2021

I have learned that you don't miss something until it is gone. Unfortunately, sometimes, it's too late. Over six weeks ago, or was it nine months, I took my truck in for a regular checkup. I was going away for the week, so I thought I would drop the truck off and let them work on it when ...read more

Scripture: 2 John 1:8

Tags: Stress, Humor

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Doctors Are Always Right

Contributed by James Snyder on May 21, 2022

Last year I suffered what is referred to as a heart attack. I got to the hospital in time, so there was no any major damage. I had one artery known as the "Widow Maker" that was 90% blocked, which seemed to be a very serious thing. Who knew I even had a heart, but doctors are always ...read more

Scripture: Galatians 6:9

Tags: Medical, Doctors

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

An Apple Fritter On My Mind

Contributed by James Snyder on Jul 2, 2022

The last few weeks have been rather hectic, and I’ve struggled to keep up with everything. If it weren’t for The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage, I probably would not have gotten where I am today. I don’t know anybody who can plan out a day, week, or month better than her. She has everything ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 25:21

Tags: Stress, Humor

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

To Ask Or Not Ask Is No Option

Contributed by James Snyder on Jul 23, 2022

You would think I would have learned all I needed to learn at my age. However, each day I learn something I did not know the day before. So much of my new learning is still connected to being married to The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. I know, for example, that she is not soliciting ...read more

Scripture: 1 John 5:14

Tags: Harmony, Questions

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Do I Need To Repeat That?

Contributed by James Snyder on Jul 30, 2022

Of all the holidays during the year that I like, my birthday is at the bottom of the list. Now that I'm at my current age, I prefer not to be reminded that I'm getting older. All a birthday does for me is tell me I'm just getting older. Who wants to be reminded of that? Then, the worst ...read more

Scripture: Romans 10:17

Tags: Unity, Hearing

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Who’s The Clown Now?

Contributed by James Snyder on Nov 5, 2022

As a young person, I was fascinated with clowns. My first encounter was at a circus I attended with my family. The main character in the circus was the clown. When I first saw those clowns, I was scared almost to death. I've never seen anything as scary as those circus clowns. That began my ...read more

Scripture: James 1:19-20

Tags: Humor, Clowns, Circus

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

How Much Is Laughter Really Worth?

Contributed by James Snyder on Sep 30, 2023

Of all the things I prioritize in my life, laughter is at the top of the list. I appreciate laughter more than any other thing. Some people get paid for their jokes, while others pay mightily. I am in the latter category. I like to make people laugh, but sometimes it costs me. Whenever I see ...read more

Scripture: Proverbs 17:22

Tags: Laughter, Medicine

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance