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In Sermon Illustrations: "Pastor Humor"

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  • How Much Is A Body Worth?

    Contributed by Rodelio Mallari on Nov 20, 2010
     | 3,238 views

    HOW MUCH IS A BODY WORTH? When biochemist Harold J. Morowitz of Yale University received a humorous birthday card from his daughter that read: "According to biochemists, the materials that make up the human body are worth only ninety-eight cents," he reached for a catalog of a supply company ...read more

  • Ruby Bridges On Doing What's Right  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Mar 27, 2011
    based on 3 ratings
     | 3,493 views

    RUBY BRIDGES ON DOING WHAT'S RIGHT "A federal judge had ordered New Orleans to open its public schools to African-American children, and the white parents decided that if they had to let black children in, they would keep their children out. They let it be known that any black children who came to ...read more

  • A Parable On Tithing  PRO

    Contributed by Scott Bradford on Apr 25, 2012
    based on 4 ratings
     | 13,516 views

    A PARABLE ON TITHING Over the last two years I was scanning in old files so that I didn’t have three file drawers full of sermons and documents. I had some old files of my dad and in them I discovered some great old stories. One was a parable on tithing. I found it humorous, I can only hope that ...read more

  • Persecution In Uganda, Story Of Kefa ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Nov 2, 2009
     | 8,359 views

    Persecution in Uganda, Story of Kefa Sempangi Kefa Sempangi (whose story is told in the book A Distant Grief, Regal Books) was a national pastor in Africa and barely escaped with his family from brutal oppression and terror in his home country of Uganda. They made their way to Philadelphia, where ...read more

  • Ipod ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Nov 14, 2009
     | 3,445 views

    iPod Religion This is right up there with what 10-year-old Joshua wrote to his pastor: “Dear Pastor, My father says I should learn the 10 Commandments. But I don’t think I want to because we have enough rules already in our house.” That’s not as bad as what 11-year-old Ralph wrote: “Dear Pastor, I ...read more

  • The Most Important Job  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 24, 2002
    based on 13 ratings
     | 1,825 views

    THE MOST IMPORTANT JOB One pastor, Thomas Elliff, decided to spend his entire morning in prayer – no coffee break, no telephone, no meetings – just prayer. He writes, “At noon I opened the door to my study. I discovered a stranger waiting to visit for just a moment. “Pastor,” he said, “You ...read more

  • When You Go To A Doctor For Your Annual Check-Up, ...  PRO

    Contributed by Paul Fritz on Oct 18, 2000
    based on 36 ratings
     | 1,449 views

    When you go to a doctor for your annual check-up, he or she will often begin to poke, prod, and press various places, all the while asking, "Does this hurt? How about this?" If you cry out in pain, one of two things has happened. Either the doctor has pushed too hard, without the right sensitivity. ...read more

  • Calm The Storm, Calm Your Heart  PRO

    Contributed by Christian Cheong on Mar 15, 2005
    based on 2 ratings
     | 9,544 views

    CALM THE STORM, CALM YOUR HEART One pastor’s wife was very afraid to take flights. Husband asks her to pray. Fear was controlling her. "Let Him know you’re afraid of flying, and God will help you." Over time, she overcame the fear. One day, she was flying with her friend through a violent ...read more

  • In 1858, Francis Ridley Havegal Visited Germany ...  PRO

    Contributed by Lou Nicholes on Apr 12, 2005
    based on 3 ratings
     | 3,358 views

    In 1858, Francis Ridley Havegal visited Germany with her father, who was being treated for an eye problem. While in a pastor’s home, she saw a painting of the crucifixion with words under it that said:"I did this for thee. What has thou done for me?" Quickly she took a piece of paper and wrote a ...read more

  • Barna Research Group Reports That 31% Of U.s. ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jan 6, 2006
     | 1,600 views

    Barna Research Group reports that 31% of U.S. adults (10 million people) have not attended a Christian church service in the past 6 months. This is up from only 17% just 18 months earlier. The jump is attributed to growing numbers of Baby busters, men and non-white adults not attending church. This ...read more

  • Biblical Illiteracy: A New Gallup Poll Finds ...  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jan 27, 2006
    based on 3 ratings
     | 2,589 views

    Biblical Illiteracy: A new Gallup Poll finds fewer than half of youths know that Jesus turned water into wine at the Cana wedding, and nearly two-thirds couldn’t identify a quote from Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount. About one in 10 thought Moses was one of the 12 apostles. Results from a comprehensive ...read more

  • The Sleep Son  PRO

    Contributed by Daniel Harman on Aug 28, 2006
    based on 4 ratings
     | 3,484 views

    THE SLEEP SON A mother watched her son begin to drain of energy as the week went on. By the end of the week he’d lost his desire to get out of bed. She heard the alarm go off through his bedroom door. Apparently he just kept punching the little snooze button on the top. Finally, after 3 or 4 extra ...read more

  • A Women Who's Husband Had Died Years Earlier ...

    Contributed by Gerald Albers on Feb 24, 2007
     | 1,387 views

    ; A women who’s husband had died years earlier had stopped by her Pastors office one day. She had been crying inside for 2 long painful years. As she talked, she related everything that had happened up to the time of her husband’s death --- everything! She knew every detail. Finally she opened ...read more

  • A Story Is Told Of A Small Group Study That Was ...

    Contributed by John Browning on Aug 6, 2007
     | 2,883 views

    A story is told of a small group study that was done each week a church. Each week it would be held in a different member’s home and the host would provide snacks and the opening prayer. One young lady always provided the best food, had the cleanest home, etc. But she could never say the prayer; ...read more

  • As I Listened To Dr Ron Hawkins On The ...

    Contributed by Paul Wallace on Sep 4, 2007
    based on 1 rating
     | 2,035 views

    As I listened to Dr Ron Hawkins on the Counseling Ministry DVD’s he said his dad who was a pastor told him after he had retired, “If I had it to do over I would preach more messages of comfort. People have so much pain in their lives.” It reminded me of the many times God would bring this text to ...read more

  • Kids Follow Parent Models 91% Of Kids Want To ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 7, 2008
     | 1,821 views

    Kids Follow Parent Models 91% of kids want to help others, says a new Kid, Inc. study of 6- to 14- year olds. 58% chose volunteering over playing video games; 38% would rather see money for their gifts go to a worthy cause instead of receiving a present. More than half responded that they have the ...read more

  • In '97, 30% Of Adults Claimed To Be Pentecostal ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 15, 2008
     | 2,662 views

    In ’97, 30% of adults claimed to be Pentecostal Christians compared to 36% in ’07. While just 8% of the U.S. population is evangelical, 49% of evangelical adults fit the charismatic definition. 51% of all born-agains are charismatic as are 46% of all adults who attend a Protestant church. 23% of ...read more

  • People Neglect Their Opportunities In Life. I ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 2,384 views

    People neglect their opportunities in life. I received a pastor’s letter in the mail last week. In the 1940s, IBM considered commercializing the new computer operation they had with the US Government. But after due consideration, Thomas J Watson, chairman of IBM, issued this statement, ...read more

  • Church Raided, Literature Confiscated In ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 1,355 views

    Church raided, literature confiscated in Uzbekistan posted March 5, 2007 The Voice of the Martyrs has received photographs of police officers interrogating believers in and around a church in Qarshi (“Karshy”), Uzbekistan. According to VOM sources police burst into the service on February 25, ...read more

  • Equal Rights, Same ...

    Contributed by Christian Cheong on Feb 23, 2010
     | 2,892 views

    EQUAL RIGHTS, SAME PRIVILEGES A pilot frequently flew his small private plane in and out of Toronto International Airport. A pastor friend asked him if he ever encountered problems taking off and landing a small craft at an airport that was dominated by so many large jets. He said, "My plane may ...read more