Contributed by Perry Greene on May 10, 2012
When the movie "The Exorcist" came out, Johnny Carson was the host of the Tonight Show. My very favorite joke he told was about the movie. He asked Ed McMahon, "What happens if you don’t pay your exorcist?" Ed repeated
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Christian/Church Of Christ
based on 2 ratings
| 1,642 views
"An unlettered maid was great in the kitchen and an immaculate housekeeper, but her main strength was that she never ruffled by anything. She was always calm and in control. When asked about her secret, she quoted a verse in the Bible: "It came to pass." When told that this was not the complete
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United Methodist
Contributed by Owen Bourgaize on Mar 5, 2001
based on 174 ratings
| 4,266 views
We need God’s help on a daily basis. I came across a little prayer in a parish magazine, headed: "A Morning Prayer for Help" - note that I said "morning"! "Dear God, so far today I’ve done alright, I haven’t gossiped, lost my temper, been nasty, selfish or over indulgent. But in a few
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Baptist
Contributed by Owen Bourgaize on Jun 22, 2001
based on 104 ratings
| 2,090 views
J B Priestley wrote a powerful play, ’They Came to a City’ in which he portrayed the disillusionment of those who entered it. The city’s splendid buildings dedicated to commerce and the arts celebrate human genius and human glory. They look fine on the glossy pages of books that tourists take
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Baptist
Contributed by Evie Megginson on Aug 7, 2001
based on 78 ratings
| 1,865 views
D. W. Whittle tells of a man who came to Charles Finney and said: "I don’t believe in the existence of a devil." "Don’t you?" said the old man. "Well, you
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Baptist
Contributed by Melvin Newland on Oct 10, 2001
based on 212 ratings
| 1,980 views
ILL. I like the old story about the guy who came to church with his family. As they were driving home afterwards he was complaining about everything. He said, “The music was too loud. The sermon was too long. The announcements were unclear. The building was hot. The people were unfriendly.”
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Melvin Newland on Nov 6, 2001
based on 60 ratings
| 1,941 views
I came across a paragraph by an 85 year old woman that I think is a classic. Here is what she wrote, "If you live to be 75 years old you will live over 657,000 hours." Did you know that? That’s almost 2/3rds of a million hours that you’re going to live. That’s too much to be anxious about all
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Paul Fritz on Nov 25, 2001
based on 17 ratings
| 4,141 views
A boy came home from Sunday school and His Mother said, "What did you discuss at Church?" The boy said, "Marriage"! His Mother said inquisitively, "What did you learn about marriage?" The little boy thought for a moment and
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Dru Ashwell on Dec 16, 2001
based on 70 ratings
| 8,167 views
One day three men were walking along and came upon a raging, violent river. They needed to get to the other side, but had no idea of how to
do it.
The first man prayed to God saying, "Please God, give me the strength to cross this river." Poof! God gave him big arms and strong legs, and
he was
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Don Hawks on May 8, 2002
based on 6 ratings
| 4,085 views
A father came home from work just before supper and was met by his five-year-old daughter on the sidewalk outside his house. The little girl was not smiling. "Is something wrong, honey?" he asked.
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Methodist
based on 4 ratings
| 1,532 views
A few weeks back, a movie came out entitled, "The Hours." Though the underlying theme of homosexuality may surprise you, the critics declare the movie was thought provoking as it dealt with how individuals handle the stresses of life as each tick of the clock reminds each one how quickly time does
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 9, 2003
based on 1 rating
| 1,209 views
It’s like the little boy who came to his mother and said, “Mommy, I’m eight feet tall.”
She said, “You are?”
“Yes,” he insisted, “I am eight feet tall.”
His mother asked what he measured himself with, and he pulled out a six inch
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Contributed by Pat Cook on Aug 4, 2003
based on 8 ratings
| 1,925 views
I came across some definitions of things we use in the church. MAGI: The most famous trio to attend a baby shower. MANGER: 1. Where Mary gave birth to Jesus because Joseph didn’t have private health cover. 2. The Biblical proof that holiday travel has always been rough. BULLETIN: Church
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Baptist
Contributed by Jason Cole on Feb 23, 2004
based on 13 ratings
| 3,958 views
I like the old story about the guy who came to church with his family. As they were driving home afterwards he was complaining about everything. He said, “The music was too loud. The sermon was too long. The announcements were unclear. The building was hot. The people were unfriendly.” He went on &
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
based on 12 ratings
| 7,522 views
just the other day a mild mannered young man came into my office ready for a divorce. He complained that his bride was so bossy that she was driving him off the wall. He wanted things to change, immediately.
I told him that he needed to build his self-esteem and that this would take time. Then I
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Methodist
Contributed by Evie Megginson on Jul 23, 2004
based on 2 ratings
| 3,475 views
A little girl came very early one morning to her mother, saying: "Which is worse, Mamma, to tell a lie or to steal?" The mother replied that both were so sinful she could not tell which was the worse. "Well, Mamma," replied the little one, "I’ve been thinking a good deal about it, and I think it is
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Baptist
Contributed by Shawn Rose on Nov 28, 2004
based on 4 ratings
| 1,368 views
My daughter came home from school one day with tears in her eyes. "Tori said that she won’t be my friend unless I sit with her on the bus." Just like that, a seven year old had placed conditions on a friendship that should have been unconditional. Sometimes we forget that Jesus loves us
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Baptist
Contributed by John Stevenson on Dec 26, 2004
When we first came to Jesus, we might not have understood just how big He is. We came to see a winsome Galilean rabbi, but we found that He is so much more.
C.S. Lewis makes this point in his Chronicles of Narnia when Lucy returns to the magic land and sees Aslan, the Christ figure.
"Aslan," said
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Evangelical Free
based on 4 ratings
| 3,666 views
One day a boy came to his father and said, "Dad, it’s just six weeks before I will be going to college and I was wondering if you were going to give me a going-away present. If you are, I have a suggestion to make." The father smiling answered, ’What is your suggestion, son?" The boy’s eyes
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Pentecostal
Sermon Central