Contributed by Sermon Central on Mar 18, 2006
based on 6 ratings
| 2,197 views
Maybe you heard about the fellow who was told by his physician, “Yes indeed, you do have rabies.” Upon hearing this, the patient immediately pulled out a pad and pencil and began to write.
Thinking the man was making out his will, the doctor said, “Listen, this doesn’t mean you’re going to die.
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Contributed by Mark Schaeufele on Mar 25, 2010
based on 1 rating
| 6,001 views
A MENTOR'S ENCOURAGEMENT
In my office hangs a tie and a pair of suspenders enclosed in a glass and wood case. Those mementos belonged to my academic advisor, mentor and friend from my days in seminary - the late Dr. Gary McGee. About half way through my program, I stood in his office tired, burned
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Denomination:
Methodist
Contributed by Melissa Pratt on Sep 25, 2008
We went to Kroger as a family tonight. When we got to the juice aisle, our six-year-old, Joshua said, "Mom, can we get some grape juice?" I was surpised as I have never purchased grape juice for the kids to drink, only apple and orange. I said, "Josh, do you even like grape juice?" He replied,
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Dave Kinney on Nov 1, 2008
based on 1 rating
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A fisherman who was out of fellowship with the Lord was at sea with his heathen buddies when a huge storm came out of nowhere and was close to destroying their small ship. His friends begged him to do anything, even pray, but he said to his buddies, “It’s been a long time since I’ve done that or
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Danny Presswood on Jan 26, 2009
based on 1 rating
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A friend found Socrates eyeing merchandise in the marketplace. The friend asked why he was looking, since he never bought anything. Socrates said: "Because I am always amazed to see how many things there are that I don't need."
At Christmas, Christians need to develop a new discipline. As our
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Dru Ashwell on Dec 16, 2001
based on 19 ratings
| 2,459 views
Actual answering machine answers recorded and verified by the
world-famous International Institute of Answering Machine Answers.
~~~~~
Hi. Now you say something.
~~~~~
Hi, I’m not home right now but my answering machine is, so you
can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep.
~~~~~
Hello. I am David’s
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Mark Opperman on Jan 3, 2008
-[Illustration] Some of you are aware that Robin and I are in the middle of a house hunt. We would like to buy a house, and live there for quite awhile, if the Lord is willing. We have wanted to buy a home all along, but I just always assumed that we did not really have the buying power to purchase
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Denomination:
Assembly Of God
Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 16, 2001
based on 151 ratings
| 1,142 views
One man challenged another to an all-day wood chopping contest.
The challenger worked with all his might, stopping only for a brief lunch break. The other man had a leisurely lunch and took several breaks throughout the day. At the end of the day, the challenger was surprised and somewhat
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When Martin Luther became a priest and celebrated his first Mass, in 1507, he trembled so much he nearly dropped the bread and cup. He became so terrified of the presence of Christ that he wanted to run from the altar. Yet that same fear of the holy, led him to be obedient to Christ and His Word
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 1 rating
| 1,885 views
A man with a nagging secret was unable to keep it any longer and he went to the priest to confess his sin. He admitted that for years he had been stealing building supplies from the lumberyard where he worked.
“How much lumber did you take?” the priest asked.
“I took enough to build my home and
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Contributed by Archie Luper on Jul 7, 2007
based on 2 ratings
| 4,158 views
Charlie Brown is seen at bat. "STRIKE THREE!" He has struck out again and slumps down on the players’ bench. He say, "Rats! I’ll never be a big league player. I just don’t have it! All my life I’ve dreamed of playing in the big leagues, but I know I’ll never make it." Lucy turns to console him.
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
One man challenged another to an all-day wood chopping contest.
The challenger worked with all his might, stopping only for a brief lunch break. The other man had a leisurely lunch and took several breaks throughout the day. At the end of the day, the challenger was surprised and somewhat annoyed
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Denomination:
Nazarene
Contributed by Et Tapper on Feb 9, 2009
Ex – A MAN WITH A NAGGING SECRET WAS UNABLE TO KEEP IT ANY LONGER.
HE WENT TO CONFESSIONAL AND ADMITTED THAT FOR YEARS HE HAD BEEN STEALING BUILDING SUPPLIES FROM THE LUMBERYARD WHERE HE WORKED.
“HOW MUCH LUMBER DID YOU TAK?” THE PRIEST ASKED.
“I TOOK ENOUGH TO BUILD MY HOME NAD ENOUGH FOR MY
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 16, 2001
based on 9 ratings
| 2,875 views
HAM, HENEK, MET
While I was serving in Paraguay, a Maka Indian named Rafael
came to sit on my porch. I was eating and went out to see what
he wanted. He responded, "Ham, henek met." Again I asked what
I could do for him, but the answer was the same. I understood
what he was saying but not its
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Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Sep 24, 2019
based on 1 rating
| 6,006 views
. A pastor was trying to teach a children’s class about how to be saved.
.”If I sold everything I have and gave it to the church, would I go to heaven?”
The children answered, “No.”
The pastor said, “Very good. That’s right. And if I worked hard at keeping the 10 commandments, would that get me
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Denomination:
Independent/Bible
Contributed by Andy Grossman on Jan 6, 2009
WHO OWNS THE CHURCH?
My grandson Nate and I went to the Church New Year's day to clean up after our wonderful New Year's Eve party. On the way there he asked, "Granpa, do you own the church?"
I said, "No. I just manage it." He says, "Well, who owns it?"
I tried to tell him that the
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Denomination:
Holiness
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